Slashdot Mirror
ApacheCon 2002 Update
groundhog00 writes "The ApacheCon US 2002 Conference has been announced and all submissions have been turned in for speakers. A final session speaker list should be available in late June/early July.
Total, there have been over 150 abstracts submitted for the Las Vegas conference, and should include some very popular speakers.
I've attended the last couple (US 2001 in San Jose, CA and the European 2000 in London, UK), and been a bit overwhelmed with the quality of material covered.
The European 2000 conference sessions can be found here and the US 2001 San Jose session listings can be found here.
Take a look at what has been offered, because there is a considerable amount of GREAT projects that have been featured in the past. Overall, the investment in those two conferences will last me a lifetime.
"
CmdrTaco: You sit here, dear.
CowboiKneel: All right.
CmdrTaco (to Waitress): Morning!
Waitress: Morning!
CmdrTaco: Well, what've you got?
Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg, sausage and bacon; egg and snot; egg, bacon and snot; egg, bacon, sausage, and snot; snot, bacon, sausage, and snot; snot, egg, snot, snot, bacon, and snot; snot, sausage, snot, snot, bacon, snot, tomato, and snot;
Slashdot Crew (starting to chant): Snot, snot, snot, snot...
Waitress:
Slashdot Crew (singing):...Snot! Lovely snot! Lovely snot!
Waitress:
CowboiKneel: Have you got anything without snot?
Waitress: Well, there's snot, egg, sausage, and snot, that's not got much snot in it.
CowboiKneel: I don't want any snot!
CmdrTaco: Why can't he have egg, bacon, snot, and sausage?
CowboiKneel: That's got snot in it!
CmdrTaco: Hasn't got as much snot in it as snot, egg, sausage, and snot, has it?
Slashdot Crew: Snot, snot, snot, snot! (crescendo through next few lines)
CowboiKneel: Could you do the egg, bacon, snot, and sausage without the snot then?
Waitress: Urgghh!
CowboiKneel: What do you mean "Urgghh!"? I don't like snot!
Slashdot Crew: Lovely snot! Wonderful snot!
Waitress: Shut up!
Slashdot Crew: Lovely snot! Wonderful snot!
Waitress: Shut up! (Slashdot Crew stops) Bloody Slashdot fags! You can't have egg, bacon, snot and sausage without the snot.
CowboiKneel (shrieks): I don't like snot!
CmdrTaco: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your snot. I love it. I'm having snot, snot, snot, snot, snot, snot, snot, beaked beans, snot, snot, snot, and snot!
Slashdot Crew (singing): Snot, snot, snot, snot. Lovely snot! Wonderful snot!
Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.
CmdrTaco: Well could I have his snot instead of the baked beans then?
Waitress: You mean snot, snot, snot, snot, snot, snot...
Slashdot Crew (singing elaborately): Snot, snot, snot, snot. Lovely snot! Wonderful snot! Snot, sno-o-o-o-o-ot, snot, sno-o-o-o-o-ot snot. Lovely snot! Lovely snot! Lovely snot! Lovely snot! Lovely snot! Snot, snot, snot, snot!
Nobody really gives a crap, so this will be the last post.
One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered *Con community when IDC confirmed that *Con market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all servers. Coming on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that *Con has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. *Con is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last [samag.com] [samag.com] in the recent Sys Admin comprehensive networking test.
You don't need to be a Kreskin [amdest.com] [amdest.com] to predict *Con's future. The hand writing is on the wall: *Con faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for *Con because *Con is dying. Things are looking very bad for *Con. As many of us are already aware, *Con continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood.
ApacheCon is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its core attendees. The sudden and unpleasant departures of long time *Con developers Jordan "The Bad One" Hibbard and MacDaddy Smith only serve to underscore the point more clearly. There can no longer be any doubt: ApacheCon is dying.
Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.
ApacheCon leader ThreePeo states that there are 7000 attendees of ApacheCon. How many attendees of BiMonSciFiCon are there? Let's see. The number of ApacheCon versus BiMonSciFiCon posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 BiMonSciFiCon attendees. Con/OS posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of BiMonSciFiCon posts. Therefore there are about 700 attendees of Con/OS. A recent article put ApacheCon at about 80 percent of the *Con market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 ApacheCon attendees. This is consistent with the number of ApacheCon hooker sales.
Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, ApacheCon went out of business and was taken over by IISCon who sell another troubled server. Now BiMonSciFiCon is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.
All major surveys show that *Con has steadily declined in market share. *Con is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If *Con is to survive at all it will be among Con dilettante attendees. *Con continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, ApacheCon is dead.
Fact: *Con is dying
I hope high gas prices are depriving your children, you fucking dumbass.
This story has been up for 5 days and so far, only 5 posts (if you include this one.) And there all TROLLS.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
Losers. (Myself included)
I hope high gas prices are depriving your children, you fucking dumbass.
That's all I have to say about that.
done like dinner.
L to the AST
P to the OST
G to the OATSE
Ladies Professional Golf?
llllllast
How long until posting is disabled on this story?