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Town Wants To Hire Witch

Posted by samzenpus on from the must-have-own-broomstick dept.

Somerset needs to hire a witch, and not just any witch will do. The town needs one who is willing to live in the Wookey Hole Caves, a local tourist attraction. The job pays £50,000 a year. Applicants "must be able to cackle," and "must not be allergic to cats." The job is open to men, women, and even trans-gender witches, to comply with sexual discrimination laws. "Wookey Hole wants the appointee to go about her everyday business as a hag, so that people passing through the caves can get a sense of what the place was like in the Dark Ages. This was when an old woman lived in the caves with some goats and a dog causing a variety of social ills including crop failures and disease. So the job is straightforward: live in the cave, be a witch, and do the things witches do," said Daniel Medley, from Wookey Hole Caves.

7 comments

  1. Job requirement by Arthur+B. · · Score: 2, Funny

    She must float.

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    1. Re:Job requirement by haifastudent · · Score: 0

      You know what I like about her? See sleeps above the covers... Three feet above the covers.

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  2. Trojan Moose by macdaddy · · Score: 1

    I hear that Sarah Palin is in need of a good job.

    1. Re:Trojan Moose by RockDoctor · · Score: 1

      Probably wouldn't be acceptable - she'll need to live on Planet Earth and be intelligible to Brits, not be some loopy-fruit lunatic from a strange universe. Plus, while Palin does her try best with her 50-style clothes, screeching voice (she's witch-qualified there) and the cackling insanity (similarly well qualified), frankly I could imagine putting my dick inside her for fun, and that simply isn't haggish enough!
      (Of course, you might wish to claim that Palin really is haggish - but I'd want to measure her legs to check that they're different lengths. Sorry, Scottish joke.)

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    2. Re:Trojan Moose by Jane+Q.+Public · · Score: 1

      ... and she'd have to weigh less than a duck.

  3. Hiding in dark places, doing strange rituals? by downix · · Score: 2, Funny

    My goodness, sounds like the normal life of the/. reader!

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  4. Damn. I'm allergic to cats. by Jane+Q.+Public · · Score: 1

    Otherwise, I would be happy to "cackle" for visitors for 50,000 GBP. My current job pays more, but this sounds a lot less stressful.