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World's Oldest Sex Toy Was a Real Fire Starter
Researchers have discovered that the world's oldest sex toy, found in a cave in Germany, was used to heat things up in places other than the bedroom. They say the 30,000-year-old siltstone phallus doubled as a tool to ignite fires. From the article: "The prehistoric phallus, which has marks where it was obviously used for striking against flints, also features carved rings around one polished end. Researchers say it's easy to see what it was used for. The scientists pieced together the multitasking tool from more than a dozen fragments found in a cave complex linked with the activities not of the Neanderthals, but of modern humans."
It was obvious used to start a fire to set the mood for things to come.
This kind of thing is hottttt. (sorry)
For every problem, there is at least one solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
Finish this sentence: "And one time, at fire-making camp, I..."
Stressed? Me? Of course not. Stress is what a rubber band feels before it breaks, silly.
While the object being used as a fire striker is a fairly safe assumption, I see no logical reason for archeologists to always assume that any object that remotely resembles a phallus was actually used as a dildo. When archeologists 1000 years from now find a dong-shaped beer bong, I wonder what their conclusions as to it's use will be...
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
so the world's oldest sex toy was a woman's?