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Al-Qaeda Launches "Jihad Cosmo" Magazine

Posted by samzenpus on from the better-homes-and-martyrs dept.

Al-Shamikha magazine looks to give fashion and beauty advice to the widows of suicide bombers as well as tips on getting your children to blow themselves up too. From the article: "A woman called Umm Muhanad hails her husband for his bravery after his suicide bombing in Afghanistan. And another article urges readers to give their lives for the Islamist cause. It advises: 'From martyrdom, the believer will gain security, safety and happiness.' More traditional content for a women's magazine includes features on the merits of honey facemasks, etiquette, first aid and why readers should avoid 'towelling too forcibly.'"

7 comments

  1. Good fashion advice by Drakkenmensch · · Score: 1

    Plastic explosives are so last season.

  2. Let's talk headgear by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Mail slot or arrow slit?

    Personally I cannot stand those slags thast show off their face.

  3. Wait... What? by Jonah+Hex · · Score: 1

    What are the effects of "towelling too forcibly"? Is it so horrible we can't even be told?

    HEX

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    Horror & SciFi Erotic Nudes
    1. Re:Wait... What? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Toweling too forcibly may result in a towlie-ban. No? Toweling too forcibly may result in your inability to be one of the 72 virgins while simultaneously causing an unwanted smile upon your face.

  4. Hoax? by GNUALMAFUERTE · · Score: 1

    Sounds like Satire to me. Reads like an awesome, very elaborate Hoax.

    Either that or I'm really out of touch with them invisible-friend-in-the-sky people.

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    WTF am I doing replying to an AC at 5 A.M on a Friday night?
    1. Re:Hoax? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This article is from The Daily Mail. That tabloid is like the Onion, except that they actually believe the nonsense they publish.

  5. I wonder if they'll... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Start selling IED parts per issue or if you subscribe for at least a year, they'll send you a whole bomb?