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User: Jesus+Christ

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  1. News from the Linux frontlines on Ebay May Bid For Sotheby's · · Score: 5
    Torvalds begins work on Linux 2.3.48.9.2.7.43, possibly
    Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday February 27, @10:36AM
    from the rob-sucks-tarballs dept

    Linus Torvalds, creator of Linux, accidentally hit his keyboard with his elbow today. We have yet to receive confirmation that the resulting code will be be included in the next development kernel, but we can never be too sure. Here is the code in full:
    kjnlkmf ,m58u45knm ,9804
    8v793oy5n9*(&V(*N&

    This won't compile under GCC, so we can only assume the code is pretty experimental. Look for the tarballs to be released this evening.

    Torvalds comments, "What? Oh, yeah, I accidentally hit my keyboard with my elbow when I reached to get my tea. What? Is it part of the new kernel? You're kidding, right?"

    We'll update the article as soon as we get more information. The Linux world hasn't been in such frenzied anticipation since the release of kernel 2.3.48.9.2.7.42, which was about ten minutes ago.


    Interview: Alan Cox farted
    Posted by Hemos on Sunday February 27, @10:34AM
    from the whats-that-smell dept

    Linux guru and hacker-extrodinaire Alan Cox farted earlier today. What do you think this says about the future of Linux development? Alan's ass will respond to the highest moderated posts later this week.


    ESR and JonKatz to participate in "Zealot Deathmatch"
    Posted by Roblimo on Sunday February 27, @10:33AM
    from the die-bitch-die dept

    Open source proponent Eric S. Raymond and Slashdot nutcase JonKatz are reportedly organizing a "Zealot Arena Deathmatch" to raise money for the Apache Software Foundation. The fight is expected to be a tough one, because while Katz is genuinely insane, ESR has the power of girly, elfish looks. A spokesman from Apache says that, "while we don't encourage violence, we'll do anything for money."


    VA Linux aquired by Klingons, Rob bows down to new alien masters
    Posted by emmett on Sunday February 27, @10:32AM
    from the star-shit-enterprise dept

    VA Linux Systems, owner of Andover.net, owner of Slashdot.org, owner of Rob's ass, was officially aquired by the Klingon Empire earlier this morning. The Klingons, who have recently taken over Kellogs, GM, and Disney, are looking forward to absorbing more major corporations in the near future. The US Government is discussing investigating the Klingons for holding a monopoly over "every aspect of our lives", to which the Klingons responded, "Puny human scum! I will crush you like a bug and feast upon your steaming entrails." Finally, some competition for Microsoft!


    Red Hat and VA stock at all time high!
    Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday February 27, @10:31AM
    from the i-am-so-rich dept

    Dude, have you heard the market reports today? I am so fucking rich! If this keeps up, I'll be able to stop doing this Slashdot crap! Hell yeah!

    I am the Lord.

  2. Re:linux vs. pussy on Linux 2.3.48 Released · · Score: 1

    WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN FUCKING ??? WALRUSSES? RHINOS?

    Too bad I couldn't have been around in the Old Testament, huh? (w/Noah's Ark)

    I am the Lord.

  3. News from the Linux frontlines on Linux 2.3.48 Released · · Score: 5
    Torvalds begins work on Linux 2.3.48.9.2.7.43, possibly
    Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday February 27, @10:36AM
    from the rob-sucks-tarballs dept

    Linus Torvalds, creator of Linux, accidentally hit his keyboard with his elbow today. We have yet to receive confirmation that the resulting code will be be included in the next development kernel, but we can never be too sure. Here is the code in full:
    kjnlkmf ,m58u45knm ,9804
    8v793oy5n9*(&V(*N&

    This won't compile under GCC, so we can only assume the code is pretty experimental. Look for the tarballs to be released this evening.

    Torvalds comments, "What? Oh, yeah, I accidentally hit my keyboard with my elbow when I reached to get my tea. What? Is it part of the new kernel? You're kidding, right?"

    We'll update the article as soon as we get more information. The Linux world hasn't been in such frenzied anticipation since the release of kernel 2.3.48.9.2.7.42, which was about ten minutes ago.


    Interview: Alan Cox farted
    Posted by Hemos on Sunday February 27, @10:34AM
    from the whats-that-smell dept

    Linux guru and hacker-extrodinaire Alan Cox farted earlier today. What do you think this says about the future of Linux development? Alan's ass will respond to the highest moderated posts later this week.


    ESR and JonKatz to participate in "Zealot Deathmatch"
    Posted by Roblimo on Sunday February 27, @10:33AM
    from the die-bitch-die dept

    Open source proponent Eric S. Raymond and Slashdot nutcase JonKatz are reportedly organizing a "Zealot Arena Deathmatch" to raise money for the Apache Software Foundation. The fight is expected to be a tough one, because while Katz is genuinely insane, ESR has the power of girly, elfish looks. A spokesman from Apache says that, "while we don't encourage violence, we'll do anything for money."


    VA Linux aquired by Klingons, Rob bows down to new alien masters
    Posted by emmett on Sunday February 27, @10:32AM
    from the star-shit-enterprise dept

    VA Linux Systems, owner of Andover.net, owner of Slashdot.org, owner of Rob's ass, was officially aquired by the Klingon Empire earlier this morning. The Klingons, who have recently taken over Kellogs, GM, and Disney, are looking forward to absorbing more major corporations in the near future. The US Government is discussing investigating the Klingons for holding a monopoly over "every aspect of our lives", to which the Klingons responded, "Puny human scum! I will crush you like a bug and feast upon your steaming entrails." Finally, some competition for Microsoft!


    Red Hat and VA stock at all time high!
    Posted by CmdrTaco on Sunday February 27, @10:31AM
    from the i-am-so-rich dept

    Dude, have you heard the market reports today? I am so fucking rich! If this keeps up, I'll be able to stop doing this Slashdot crap! Hell yeah!

    I am the Lord.

  4. Re:linux vs. pussy on Linux 2.3.48 Released · · Score: 0
    Heh, that's not a pussy, that's a man, baby!

    Just because it's pink, warm, and tight, that doesn't make it a pussy!

    I am the Lord.

  5. Re:You think you're safe? on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 1
    I got moderated down for insulting a whining AC. What is /. coming to?

    (My guess is that the AC had mod points.)

    I am the Lord.

  6. balls of fire (courtesy of quantum) on ABIT BP6 Motherboard explicitly supports FreeBSD · · Score: 1

    I got a good deal on a couple of 13.6GB Quantum Fireballs a while back, so I've been using those. Haven't had any performance problems, but they do seem do get warm. Well, they're called Fireballs, so should I be surprised?

    Whenever I get off my ass and switch to SCSI, I'm sure I'll have a good chuckle at them.

    I'd appreciate any other Quantum Fireball info. I don't know if the company even makes decent hardware. When I bought them, I was looking at it this way: they're the right size, the right price, they're ATA/66, and the company isn't a total unknown to me. Cash or charge? ;-) So it's possible that I am missing out on performance, and I just don't know it yet.

    I am the Lord.

  7. Re:ABIT BP6, SMP, and OS on ABIT BP6 Motherboard explicitly supports FreeBSD · · Score: 1

    Solaris would cough up a page fault on one of the processors.

    I have installed Solaris 7 on my BP6 box numerous times with no trouble. I've done it with the processors running at rated speed (400MHz), and overclocked (6x83 = 500MHz).

    My well matched, pre-tested celerons were meant to run TOGETHER, so Solaris was shelved.
    I guess I've been lucky, because my Celerons are retail, off-the-shelf from Buy.com. ;-)

    My one beef, which applies to Solaris, BSD, and Linux, is that they will neither detect, nor install to, anything on the UltraATA/66 bus. Maybe I just wasn't trying hard enough.

    I am the Lord.

  8. register.com on Who is the Best Registrar? · · Score: 1
    I've used register.com to register two domains. I don't think they are the cheapest, but I haven't had any problems.

    I am the Lord.

  9. abit bp6 is wonderful on ABIT BP6 Motherboard explicitly supports FreeBSD · · Score: 1
    I have been running FreeBSD on a BP6 a while now, and I think it's great. Even if you aren't interested in SMP, it's a great Celeron mainboard.

    Good things about the BP6:

    • Ultra ATA/66 support. In addition to the two "regular" IDEs. That means you can hook up six IDE devices instead of four.
    • One AGP slot, five dedicated PCI slots, and two dedicated ISA slots.
    • An **excellent** BIOS, complete with independant CPU temperature monitoring. The Celeron is very overclockable, and the BP6 BIOS is wonderful for this. You get a lot of MHz options, not just 66 and 100. I'm currently using Celeron 400s, both O/C to 500MHz at 6x83MHz. Very sweet.
    • 768MB max RAM!!

    I've been soooooooooo happy with this system.

    Yes, it is true that the FreeBSD SMP kernel isn't as "fast" as Linux's. However, IMHO it is more stable. And even if it weren't, I'd rather run it with one processor than switch to Linux. But that's just my deal.

    One downside: cooling. If you are planning on building a system with this board, get a full tower. Two O/C Celerons will get rather hot, and if you toss in a 7200rpm HDD or two, you will be cooking. You'll need the extra space in the full tower just for cooling supples. Run over to CoolerGuys and stock up now. Here is my personal experience cooling with this mainboard:

    • Those Celerons will get hot even running at rated speed. The stock Intel fan/heatsink combo is not suffient for an SMP system. I recommend the Alpha NovaTech PAL6035. A less expensive option is the Global Win VFP32
    • 7200rpm HDDs need cooling. Try a Baycooler or an Istorm.
    • Also nice are the slot coolers. I use the Vantec. PC Power & Cooling makes a funky looking one which I can't recommend.
    • If you aren't careful or have a small case, the IDE cables can block the CPU1 fan. This will cause a 1 - 4 degree farenheit rise in that CPUs temperature.

    Note: I am not affialiated with Cooler Guys, but I buy all of my crap from them, so those were the links I had handy.

    I have gotten the CPUs up past 112F without lockups in this mainboard, but I'd recommend keeping things below 95. This isn't easy but your HDDs will last longer if you keep things cool.

    Enough ranting for now. I just love that BP6!!

    I am the Lord.

  10. Re:You think you're safe? on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 0

    What about those 2 or 3 internet users out there who can't read code? What are they to do?

    I imagine they'll post AC, and whine a lot. Hey, that's just like you! Wow!

    I am the Lord.

  11. Re:Moderator is trolling on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 1

    the moderator is an ass. He couldn't recognize sarcasm if it bit him in the ass.

    While that's probably true, I wasn't being sarcastic. ;-)

    No, it's true! I have no idea what sarcasm even is! Really!

    Oh, I also don't know what what irony means.

    I am the Lord.

  12. this is mine on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 1
    Didn't mean to post this AC. But, I did. By accident.

    Sorry.

    I am the Lord.

  13. Re:Interesting? How? on Linux 2.3.48 Released · · Score: 1

    Heaven forbid they *revolve* the stories and just show the 10 most recent....

    They do, crackhead. If more stories are posted in a day than are meant to fit on the front page, they go over in the "Older Stuff" Slashbox. Duh.

    The rest of your post was fine, though. Stock watching indeed.

    I am the Lord.

  14. Re:cookies on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 2

    Well, since you're posting on slashdot as a logged in user, you're obviously hypocritical on this one.

    Actually, you don't need cookies to post under a registered name. You can type in your name and password and hit "Submit". Without cookies. (If you hit "Preview", you'll have to type them in again before you post.)

    You only need cookies on Slashdot if:

    • you want /. to remember who you are from post to post (for convenience) OR
    • you want your comments.pl and front page to be customized

    Why not instead tell them to run something like junkbusters that'll actually let them control what cookies they want instead of just blindly and across-the-board killing them all?

    Because I'd rather turn cookies on when I really do need them, instead of keeping them on all the time and having some third-party app prompt me every two seconds.

    I only turn cookies on when I'm using a shopping cart. Cookies on, buy goods, cookies off. Very quick and easy. . .

    . . .in Netscape, obviously. MSIE users have a tougher time, becasue IE5 hides the cookie settings in a slow "Security level" dialog. Sometimes I think that MS made that dialog slow just to discourage people that switch their settings a lot. <flamebait>But then I remember that all M$ software sucks, so I should stop being paranoid.</flamebait>

    (Just kidding. Not all MS softare sucks. Notepad is pretty nice. ;-)

    I am impressed, however, that Junkbusters offers the source.

    I am the Lord.

  15. Re:Goku? Gohan? on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 1

    Nice. ;-) (I was the Gendou at Otakon 99.)

    (...well, there were a couple others. But they were only there on Saturday morning. So I win.)

    I'll be there again this summer. Unfortunately, the number of Reis is diminishing, so I'll have to start molesting Lains. Lain is the theme this year, so I'm sure to have better luck.

    I am the Lord.

  16. moderate this, asshole on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 1
    See? I told ya. They couldn't resist the temptation to moderate down my flamebait. That's the kind of maturity that comes with Dragonball territory.

    Hey. did I say almost as bad as Pokemon? Actually, the animation is worse. ;-)

    I am the Lord.

  17. Re:Goku? Gohan? on GoHip.com ActiveX Wreaks Havoc · · Score: 0

    I don't want to spend the rest of my life in front of the TV watching a bad Japanese cartoon!!!

    I agree. I am a certifiable Otaku and anime fan, and I can't stand Dragonball. It's at the low end of a great genre, almost as bad as Pokemon. At the conventions, the Dragonballers are usually either eight-year-olds, or really sad frat-boy types. The animation is worse than even some American cartoons. (Ouch!)

    Like Internet Exploder is an "OS enhancement" to Losedows, right?

    "Losedows?" That's really bad, man. I was with you for a minute there, but... uh...

    I am the Lord.

  18. Re:sign up now! - jon katz anal gangbang! on Looking at UltraSPARC III · · Score: 1

    Forgotten to logout or tick "Post Anonymously", he?

    Absolutely not. That link is used, in fact, by several elite trolls in this forum. The Chide Molesta is one of them, if I am not mistaken. But no, I did not intend to post that anonymously. I, Jesus Christ, would not stoop so low.

    People who live in Anonymous houses shouldn't throw stones, Mr. AC.

    Or something.

    I am the Lord.

  19. Re:Imagine the possibilities... on Looking at UltraSPARC III · · Score: 1
    Apparently you missed the irony. Since some of us are slow, let me explain:
    • The "solution" I proposed, in jest, would expend a few hundred thousand simoleons that Rob doesn't have.
    • The "solution" I proposed, in jest, suggested abandoning Linux. Which, for Slashdot, is not at all likely.
    • The "solution" I proposed, in jest, noted use an OC-48, which would be nigh impossible for Slashdot to aquire access to, even if Rob did have the cash.
    • The "solution", blah blah, noted use of servlets, which Rob has previously addressed. I won't bother to restate his conclusions.

    I apologize for the confusion, "fabjep". Next time, I'll make sure to put little smilies, so everyone gets it.

    PS - That T1 is wasted on you. Why can't you download your pr0n via cable modem like everyone else?

    I am the Lord.

  20. Re:Written using emacs on Looking at UltraSPARC III · · Score: 1

    I used emacs to write the whole article in HTML . . . Written on a FreeBSD box too

    Soul brotha! I do all my coding in Emacs and XEmacs, currently on FreeBSD 3.3. (and hopefully on 4.0 by mid-March! Rock!)

    I love coding straight HTML. I put out pages that are smaller (in KB), faster, more efficient, and better looking. As a bonus, I know exactly where to go and what to do when something breaks or I need to update. (Another bonus is getting to act elitist around the Win32 Frontpage lusers)

    Actually, I use Emacs for coding pretty much everything. C, Java, Perl, HTML, JavaScript... Emacs is there for me. The only thing an IDE comes in handy for, IMHO, is when you have to port something to Windows. M$ never intended anyone to code their little widgets by hand, and it shows.

    My only question is... why did you feel the need to post and tell everyone that? Did someone accuse you of being a Frontpage weenie?

    I am the Lord.

  21. Re:Imagine the possibilities... on Looking at UltraSPARC III · · Score: 1
    So how would we speed up Slashdot? Here's my plan:
    1. Rewrite Slash to use Java servlets. Use Allaire JRun for the servlet engine.
    2. Replace Apache with Netscape Enterprise.
    3. Get rid of whatever crappy Linux boxes they're running now, and replace them with a half-dozen Sun E450s.
    4. Put two of the E450s in California, two in New York, one in Michigan, and one in Texas. Rob updates the server in Michigan, which in turn updates the others across the country.
    5. Two hardcore IBM AIX servers (locations TBD) receive HTTP requests over OC-48 and distribute the load to the six Suns.
    6. Rejoice.
    Eventually this will become necessary. Andover's shitty Linux boxes, and the Internet as a whole, can't take Slashdot's traffic. Hey Rob: now that VA owns your ass, when are you going to ask for some decent hardware?

    I am the Lord.

  22. Re:no pic? on Looking at UltraSPARC III · · Score: 1

    I hate to agree with you, but I do. Why do we geeks love seeing pics of CPUs? I mean, it's the performance that counts, right? And once it's in the box you never see it unless you're dusting or plugging in more RAM.

    I guess it's because guys are very "visual". Women don't get pr0n. CPU pics are geek pr0n.

    I am the Lord.

  23. fuck off, luser on SSH v. SRP · · Score: 1

    As you can see, the slashdot environment can be very hostile, so I have no reason to publish the source codes.

    You just don't get it, do you? You expect Slashdotters to download your binaries off a Geocities site, when you can't even give a decent explanation of what your program does. Then several people with obviously a much greater quantity of brains than you go on to show how your "algorithm" (and I use the term very loosely) is not only logically flawed, but is completely irrelevant, due to the fact that much better programs already exist.

    The enviroment isn't "hostile" at all. We tried to have a very rational discussion with you. You lack the mathematical knowledge to clearly explain your "algorithm", so you call us hostile? What gives? A previous poster had a good point: with all of the genius mathematicians and computer scientists that spend their lives studying number theory and cryptoanalysis, an self-proclaimed "IT engineer" (who could be little more than a haughty MSCE) had better be prepared to explain himself when he claims to have discovered an algorithm which can "find primes fast" (bold yours).

    "Fast" is relative. "Fast" implies that it's fast compared to modern existing programs. Your examples were piss-poor. Signed 16- and 32-bit numbers are hardly crytographically relevant anymore. Then, you say that you gave the best times out of a few trials. Wow, how scientific of you.

    You "have no reason to publish the source codes?" No-one wants them! The only reason someone asked you to post the loops is because you couldn't explain your own concept.

    "Hey, guys, I have this really fast algorithm I came up with! You can try my l337 Linux binaries, 'cause I'm so generous! What does it do and how does it work? Well, I can't really explain it... and I don't want to let you see the code, because when top university scientists from around the world discover what a genius I am, I want to be able to talk all the credit. Hey, stop using big words and intelligent sentences, you meanies! Forget it, I'm taking my amazing program and it's amazing source elsewhere!" What a fucking dipshit.

    I am the Lord.

  24. Re:USe OpenSSH on SSH v. SRP · · Score: 1
    WTF? Why was this moderated as "Troll"? AC is not only providing valid information and a good link, but he's right: US crypto is BY POLICY under the big black boot of the NSA. As long as crytography is classified as a munition by the US Gov't (a holdover from the days before computers and e-commerce, when the only practical uses for even *weak* cryptography were during wartime), it will continue to be regulated by the Gov't. The solution is to use open security products, often provided by internationals (if people stop buying US cryto, the Gov't will be under even more pressure from the industry to relax).

    The concept of stronger security through Open Source is strange to some, but in time we will be vindicated. Closed-source security stagnates. That's why M$ will *still* be releasing security patches for NT4 long after Linux security problems will have become almost a nonissue (on the OS side).

    Jesus says, "If a thousand monkey coders hacked for a thousand years, the monkey coder community would produce a Secure OS. This is the power of Open-Source."

    I'm going to stop ranting now. I'm starting to sound like ESR on [more] crack.

    I am the Lord.

  25. Re: Kerberos on SSH v. SRP · · Score: 1

    Kerberos is also available for both Red Hat and Debian.

    . . . and almost every other UNIX or UNIX-like OS, not to mentioned Win32. It's not a system for the undedicated, but if you really need (or think you need) that much security, IMHO it's one of the best solutions.

    Debian has at least three implementations - two European implementations are on non-US

    Yes, unfortunately most Kerberos uses DES, which will continue to be cumbersome unless the US relaxes their cryto policy. We keep hearing about how this is being discussed (or at least I do; I'm in DC), but we've yet to see any concrete results. Alas...

    OpenSSH is still an excellent choice, but not because it alone supports Kerberos.

    I never meant to imply that that is why OpenSSH is Good Thing(TM). I mentioned the fact that OpenBSD is packaged with this software because I think that is one reason it's a good OS for learning about "paranoid" (read: good) UNIX security. Of course, you can set up most any *BSD to perform similarly, but OpenBSD prides itself on being secure "out-of-the-box". I am not affiliated with the OpenBSD project, but I do use their OS and value the same things they appear to: free UNIX, strong cryto, and the right to privacy.

    Speaking of rights, FREE KEVIN! (What?! He did...? When? Why wasn't I notified? Dammit.) Did I say Free Kevin? I meant... FREE WILLY!

    I am the Lord.