I think people should mind their own bloody business personally. It's not like he's poisoning his body with drugs or alcohol or hurting other people with his "addiction".
How to help a friend? Leave them the hell alone to live their life how they want and stop being so bloody pretentious in thinking this person needs to be "saved".
I'm pretty much on board with this perspective. At some point he's an adult and takes responsibilities for his own actions. He might look back years later and lament the lost time (and quite possibly a delayed education), but that will have been his choice. The potential to be doing other things doesn't mean that he'd be happier not doing what he is now.
If he was spending all his time shut away in his room reading books, this wouldn't be post-worthy, it'd just be someone with a reclusive personality. If he was out getting smashed at parties and getting laid all the time, it wouldn't be post-worthy either. Still, it's just as easy to look back with regret on a year of partying as it is a year of playing an MMO.
You're not saying the same thing that the guy you cite in your text, read what he writes more carefully. Besides some poeple (a lot of them) don't get out of an addiction, you know it yourself since you said : "he might".
What if he never come out of it ? Can you then be okay that you never helped him because he was "an adult". Would you not regret to not have even have try to help a relative when you could ?
I think the way you think too individualist in my opinion, you should take some height and you'll see that alone, a human being don't do much. Our entire existence is defined by what we call people.
Would you be smart if nobody was there ? Would you be strong if nobody was there ? Does the actions you take even if you're the only responsible, cannot influence your environement ? Why is there never any movies about a guy living completely alone on a desert island and being sane ?
Now the little sentence about happiness is quite funny. I mean everybody have his conception of hapiness, just remember that pedophile too have their own. My point ? Some opinion are just bullshit, sometimes it is hard to put it in word, it's more of a gut feeling, but yet it's bullshit. That doesn't mean that you have to say it or do something about it. However in this case spending that much time on a game cannot make you happy, you can feel good, you can like it but you're not happy.
That being said, I agree totally with the second part of what you said. Except the end, seriously man, who do you think lost more of his life, feels deep regrets and is more prepare to deal with the consequences : the one who got laid or the MMO player ? I'm not saying that there are better addiction that other, just that there are more easier one to live than other.
That's not even smart. Seriously man read the original post and then read your own.
Why didn't you just mind your OWN business instead of coming here to say stuff like that. The guy ask for help, if you don't want to help, don't force yourself to comment lol.
Hi,
Obviously your experience marked you deeply, loosing a brother to a game (or anything else) must be painful.
However he's not gone, he's still breathing.You're way too pessimistic, you didn't let go of your friend without trying, you should not say to this guy to just give up. Giving up he's never a solution it's what people do when they don't bother anymore, I don't blame you after all you got a life to.
Coming from a place filled with junkies (thanks god I'm out of there) and knowing some still today, there is one thing I can tell you for sure and true for all of them, you can always get out of it, if you've got enough resolve, but if you do get out of it you'll have to pay the consequences. Don't think that you can spend time in a cave, not taking care of yourself for god knows how long and get out one day being "fine".
Resolve can't be forced, you either get it by your own or people help you get there. It's easier when you've got helps, it requires less mental strength. You're friend was weak somehow, normal people don't stay in a filthy room playing a game because they like the game, like any addiction, MMO addiction don't start because the game is good, it starts because people are weak and feel like something is missing in their life (or they looking for something).
Anyway, sammydee if you really wants to help your friend, there are no miracle solutions, or unique one, but I've got certain made up rules that help me deal with situation like that in the past:
-Know your limits. Don't do let the guy rot in a cave, force him into specialist care, if you can. Don't force yourself beyond certain limits, if you can't, just let it go, you got a life too.
-You have to REALLY want to do it, if you have hesitations give up now.
-You have to be tough, you don't always cure people by being nice and understanding. Don't let him disrespect you FOR any reasons, you're invading he's privacy, even if it his for his own good, it's still not your business so don't expect him to welcome you with open arm (otherwise no problems lol). Most people don't like when you mess with their privacy. If you are afraid of some punches just let him go.
-You have to be a logical, stop feeling and do what needs to be done.
Just before people start commenting on my "rules" these are rules that I used myself to help friends and family from certain situations. It's not a miracle solution but it helped in some cases.
Good luck.
Slashdot Mirror
I think people should mind their own bloody business personally. It's not like he's poisoning his body with drugs or alcohol or hurting other people with his "addiction".
How to help a friend? Leave them the hell alone to live their life how they want and stop being so bloody pretentious in thinking this person needs to be "saved".
I'm pretty much on board with this perspective. At some point he's an adult and takes responsibilities for his own actions. He might look back years later and lament the lost time (and quite possibly a delayed education), but that will have been his choice. The potential to be doing other things doesn't mean that he'd be happier not doing what he is now.
If he was spending all his time shut away in his room reading books, this wouldn't be post-worthy, it'd just be someone with a reclusive personality. If he was out getting smashed at parties and getting laid all the time, it wouldn't be post-worthy either. Still, it's just as easy to look back with regret on a year of partying as it is a year of playing an MMO.
You're not saying the same thing that the guy you cite in your text, read what he writes more carefully.
Besides some poeple (a lot of them) don't get out of an addiction, you know it yourself since you said : "he might".
What if he never come out of it ?
Can you then be okay that you never helped him because he was "an adult".
Would you not regret to not have even have try to help a relative when you could ?
I think the way you think too individualist in my opinion, you should take some height and you'll see that alone, a human being don't do much. Our entire existence is defined by what we call people.
Would you be smart if nobody was there ?
Would you be strong if nobody was there ?
Does the actions you take even if you're the only responsible, cannot influence your environement ?
Why is there never any movies about a guy living completely alone on a desert island and being sane ?
Now the little sentence about happiness is quite funny. I mean everybody have his conception of hapiness, just remember that pedophile too have their own. My point ? Some opinion are just bullshit, sometimes it is hard to put it in word, it's more of a gut feeling, but yet it's bullshit. That doesn't mean that you have to say it or do something about it. However in this case spending that much time on a game cannot make you happy, you can feel good, you can like it but you're not happy.
That being said, I agree totally with the second part of what you said. Except the end, seriously man, who do you think lost more of his life, feels deep regrets and is more prepare to deal with the consequences : the one who got laid or the MMO player ?
I'm not saying that there are better addiction that other, just that there are more easier one to live than other.
That's not even smart. Seriously man read the original post and then read your own. Why didn't you just mind your OWN business instead of coming here to say stuff like that. The guy ask for help, if you don't want to help, don't force yourself to comment lol.
Hi, Obviously your experience marked you deeply, loosing a brother to a game (or anything else) must be painful. However he's not gone, he's still breathing.You're way too pessimistic, you didn't let go of your friend without trying, you should not say to this guy to just give up. Giving up he's never a solution it's what people do when they don't bother anymore, I don't blame you after all you got a life to. Coming from a place filled with junkies (thanks god I'm out of there) and knowing some still today, there is one thing I can tell you for sure and true for all of them, you can always get out of it, if you've got enough resolve, but if you do get out of it you'll have to pay the consequences. Don't think that you can spend time in a cave, not taking care of yourself for god knows how long and get out one day being "fine". Resolve can't be forced, you either get it by your own or people help you get there. It's easier when you've got helps, it requires less mental strength. You're friend was weak somehow, normal people don't stay in a filthy room playing a game because they like the game, like any addiction, MMO addiction don't start because the game is good, it starts because people are weak and feel like something is missing in their life (or they looking for something). Anyway, sammydee if you really wants to help your friend, there are no miracle solutions, or unique one, but I've got certain made up rules that help me deal with situation like that in the past: -Know your limits. Don't do let the guy rot in a cave, force him into specialist care, if you can. Don't force yourself beyond certain limits, if you can't, just let it go, you got a life too. -You have to REALLY want to do it, if you have hesitations give up now. -You have to be tough, you don't always cure people by being nice and understanding. Don't let him disrespect you FOR any reasons, you're invading he's privacy, even if it his for his own good, it's still not your business so don't expect him to welcome you with open arm (otherwise no problems lol). Most people don't like when you mess with their privacy. If you are afraid of some punches just let him go. -You have to be a logical, stop feeling and do what needs to be done. Just before people start commenting on my "rules" these are rules that I used myself to help friends and family from certain situations. It's not a miracle solution but it helped in some cases. Good luck.