What's harming Jabber is not lack of users. Userbases have to be built up from somewhere, and zero is as good a place to start as any.
No, what's harming Jabber is lack of sexual content.
Let's face it: sex sells. Sexuality pervades the modern marketplace, glistening as it dribbles down the sides of billboards selling cars and radiating off the neon shine of liquor displays. If Jabber is to succeed, it must get in at the ground level with sex now, before the secret of successs gets out and everyone's doing it.
Jabber must be integrated with the state of the art in neural network sexual-tension-recognition software to bring the latest in sexual stimulation to sex-starved clients. Whereas AIM is content to convert emoticons such as ":-)" into smiley faces, Jabber must display full-frontal graphic and explicit nudity. If someone ends an IM with }:-), then there had better be goatsex on his partner's screen. We deserve no less.
Only once Jabber has colonized the citizenry's noosphere can it be declared an unabashed success. We shall have six-year-olds snickering "jab her" and making rude pelvic thrusts within our time! Russia shall not be the first to land an IM client on Uranus.
That is the path Jabber's development team should take. Whether they shall see the light is a different matter, alas.
This is the most coherent, intelligent, well-written review I've ever seen Katz post. Perhaps in the future I will read his other submissions more thoroughly as well.
Compared to his usual drivel, this is like striking it rich! Congratulations, I take my hat o...
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What's harming Jabber is not lack of users. Userbases have to be built up from somewhere, and zero is as good a place to start as any.
No, what's harming Jabber is lack of sexual content.
Let's face it: sex sells. Sexuality pervades the modern marketplace, glistening as it dribbles down the sides of billboards selling cars and radiating off the neon shine of liquor displays. If Jabber is to succeed, it must get in at the ground level with sex now, before the secret of successs gets out and everyone's doing it.
Jabber must be integrated with the state of the art in neural network sexual-tension-recognition software to bring the latest in sexual stimulation to sex-starved clients. Whereas AIM is content to convert emoticons such as ":-)" into smiley faces, Jabber must display full-frontal graphic and explicit nudity. If someone ends an IM with }:-), then there had better be goatsex on his partner's screen. We deserve no less.
Only once Jabber has colonized the citizenry's noosphere can it be declared an unabashed success. We shall have six-year-olds snickering "jab her" and making rude pelvic thrusts within our time! Russia shall not be the first to land an IM client on Uranus.
That is the path Jabber's development team should take. Whether they shall see the light is a different matter, alas.
This is the most coherent, intelligent, well-written review I've ever seen Katz post. Perhaps in the future I will read his other submissions more thoroughly as well.
Compared to his usual drivel, this is like striking it rich! Congratulations, I take my hat o...
oh wait. I HATE April Fool's Day!