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User: DarthGumby

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  1. What a Piece of CRAP! on Forum:Blair Witch Project · · Score: 1



    I can get into the shakey camera work...

    I can get into the student documentary look...

    I liked it for about the first 30-40 minutes,
    but...

    WHERE IS THE REALLY SCAREY STUFF ???

    No, I'm not talking about cheese-ball FX, but
    rather something that does a head-job on your
    emotions.

    BOY THOSE HANGING TWIGS WERE SCAREY!!!

    or

    THE KILLER PILES OF ROCKS!!!

    I honestly thought that the filmakers took about
    half an hour to tie up some twigs and then hang
    them, because they were originally making a
    student film with no time or money to spend on
    creating better ominous looking props.

    It was obvious near the end that they were
    running out of ideas, and figured they could
    end their magnum opus in an abandoned house
    that happened to be around.

    OK, so how what would I do to make it scarier ?

    First have the whole thing happen in one long
    unending night, where the main characters are
    pleading for daylight to end their suffering.

    Next, drive both the characters and the audience
    mad with the screams of their missing friend
    being ruthlessly tortured without mercy...
    (This might be a bit much for the audience,
    but it would make the film more unnerving)

    Next, have the main characters panic and run
    about in the dark, terror stricken, not knowing
    wheather they were running to or away from the
    unseen menace. This would hasten the eventual
    full breakdown of the main characters.

    The filmakers really blew the opportunity to
    shoot some fly by the seat of your ass menacing
    chase scenes, where the characters are too
    afraid to stop running.

    Next, change the little twig-bundle "present"
    from a piece of scalp, to a bunch of bloody
    teeth. (i.e. The Witch likes to do a little
    freelance dentistry on the side.)

    Next, have their bloody, beaten, toothless
    (You might have to find an actor with false
    teeth to do this on the cheap!) friend return
    to their camp, and tell the others in mumbly
    words that they're all fucked, and that the
    night is young and that more fun is in store.

    ...Anyways, I could go on, but these are the
    kind of scenes that would have me cringing in
    my seat if they were pulled off in a realistic
    way.

    Personally, I felt that I was sucked in by all
    the hype, and was hoping to be scared shitless
    by some new enfant terribles of the cinema.

    As far a a recommendation for a better scarey
    movie, here's two that did it for me in the
    past:

    "Cries and Whispers" by Ingmar Bergman

    "Eraser Head" by David Lynch
    (Also made on a peanut budget at the time)

    Also, some of the old "Night Gallery" TV
    shows were pretty freaky little numbers.

    - DG