1) Make it complex
2) Cram in every buzzword, expensive license, and
strategic partnership you can.
3) You're gonna be the next Microsoft.
4) Do no releases. Software thats released gives
too much away. Your ideas are too lofty to be
nailed down like that!
5) Comply with irrelevant standards
For example:
"SuperZyzergy.com enabling a new way of doing
business on the web! Oracle, Solaris,
W3C compliant business solutions, enhancing
the synergy of your XML framework!"
Company had 40 employees, gold plated everything,
a gigabit network back when that cost $$$. The
lone technical member of the staff was suffering
delusions regarding the wonderful possibilities
of an XML enabled world, "even your car will
run on XML instead of gas!". He'd recently gotten
to parse a small XML file after several
months of work, at a salary of $200K/year. Of
course most of his time was spent synergizing
about business strategy and alliances. Where
Oracle would come in he didn't know yet, but
he'd already spent $1M on a license deal.
The company IPO party cost $5M, and his stock
was soon worth $100M on paper. The stockholders
saw the value of the XML enabled world, even if
the customers still couldn't figure out what they
where selling, or even how to buy some of it.
[CRASH]
As much as the crash and recession sucked, it
is kind of nice that technical skill matters
again. For a while programming was irrelevant
as long as you could sling around long strings
of buzzwords with some 'synergies' and 'enablings'
thrown in.
Slashdot Mirror
1) Make it complex 2) Cram in every buzzword, expensive license, and strategic partnership you can. 3) You're gonna be the next Microsoft. 4) Do no releases. Software thats released gives too much away. Your ideas are too lofty to be nailed down like that! 5) Comply with irrelevant standards For example: "SuperZyzergy.com enabling a new way of doing business on the web! Oracle, Solaris, W3C compliant business solutions, enhancing the synergy of your XML framework!" Company had 40 employees, gold plated everything, a gigabit network back when that cost $$$. The lone technical member of the staff was suffering delusions regarding the wonderful possibilities of an XML enabled world, "even your car will run on XML instead of gas!". He'd recently gotten to parse a small XML file after several months of work, at a salary of $200K/year. Of course most of his time was spent synergizing about business strategy and alliances. Where Oracle would come in he didn't know yet, but he'd already spent $1M on a license deal. The company IPO party cost $5M, and his stock was soon worth $100M on paper. The stockholders saw the value of the XML enabled world, even if the customers still couldn't figure out what they where selling, or even how to buy some of it. [CRASH] As much as the crash and recession sucked, it is kind of nice that technical skill matters again. For a while programming was irrelevant as long as you could sling around long strings of buzzwords with some 'synergies' and 'enablings' thrown in.