E-Mail Patent Roundup From The NYT

griffjon writes: "This NYT article details a new patent on getting spam to offline e-mail readers with popup ads and banners more annoying than your average spam. Fantastic. Also contains a funny patent about e-mailing stolen computers to retrieve them." I love the system that would let a predetermined e-mail subject line "initiate a predetermined security response, either locking the display screen so nothing would appear, showing only the name and contact information of the owner or erasing the laptop's hard drive." That one sounds foolproof, eh? (freeregistrationrequiredofcourse.)

Comments

You need to FIND the stolen computer first.

[itarget]

I'd love to know how they'd expect us to find a stolen machine in order to issue the "kill" email to it.

It's going to be on the net with a completely different ISP (if at all), and the new owner is not likely to access your email account even if the password is available; most ISPs I know of block POP3/IMAP connections that aren't coming from their own subnets.

Unknown IP address, no email connection, no points of contact... so how's this kill email supposed to be anything but a timebomb waiting to go off on the legitimate owner?

I'm just glad I don't have such an embarassing patent under my name. =)
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Where can the word be found, where can the word resound? Not here, there is not enough silence.

Not as bad as it sounds

[po_boy]

The patent doesn't describe a way to email people ads, it describes a way providers (like Juno) can make you see ads when you're using their email client, but don't have connectivity. It pretty much grabs a tarball of ads when it can and them shows them to you whenever their client is running.

I understand that many people consider that spam as well, but that kind of spam is at least controlled more easily.

Here's the abstract of the patent:

A system for providing scheduled messages to a remote user in a batch oriented system. In a preferred embodiment of the present invention, a user creates and/or reads electronic mail locally. While the user creates the electronic mail, a message is displayed to the user on a portion of the local monitor, the message preferably changing in accordance with a local display schedule and stored on a local storage device. The message is preferably targeted to the particular user. When the user is ready to transmit the e-mail created and/or receive e-mail addressed to him, the user's local client establishes a connection via a modem with a remote e-mail server system. The remote e-mail server system not only receives the e-mail transmitted by the user and/or transmits e-mail addressed to the user, but also updates the user's local messages in accordance with a distribution schedule. After the e-mail and message updates are transmitted, the user's local client computer is disconnected from the remote e-mail server system.

By the way, I wonder why they included via a modem in there. It seems like an unnecessary limitation.

Re:Not as bad as it sounds

[stevens]

A system for providing scheduled messages to a remote user in a batch oriented system.

Can't we at least find prior art for this bit? usr/bin/fortune ring a bell? :-)

Actually, this seems too obvious to be properly awarded. Consider if you were given the following requirements:

• must display ads, and cycle every x seconds
• must not rely on persistent network connection

Under such circumstances, would not any reasonably competent programmer be able to suggest downloading several ads while online and cycling them via a timer in the local program? How flipping obvious do these have to get before they're not considered 'inventions'?

This stuff gets my goat because it makes a mockery out of true inventors.

Steve

Web cam...

[chowda]

If it had a Built In Webcam (tm) you could tak3 pictures and send 7hem to y0u.

or what ab0ut a fing3rprin7 l0ck? so identific4ti0n c0uld be sent to the p0lic3 when the attempt to 0pen 1t h4pp3n5.

What if it had lazerz and 5m0ke b0mbs!! wouldn7 that be c0ol? I c4n get s0me p4r7z 4nd h4x0r 0n3 70g37h3r 0u7 0f 5p4r3 m07h3rb04rdz 4nd 9unp0wd3r!!!!!!! 7H47 WUD B3 1337!!!!

wow... I should go...

Re:No end to spam

[phantomlord]

If you want freedom of speech online, and advertising is speech, then what the hell are you thinking? How can you think that Spammers should all be attacked, and made illegal, when you think that DeCSS should be free, because it is speech?

I'm no lawyer but the difference is that people(Americans anyway) have the right to free speech as protected by the First Amendment because it is vital part of individual freedom to allow them to speak their mind about any topic they wish. Businesses are a created entity allowed under law and have no inherent rights - only what the government grants them. The question is then, does government grant the same freedom of speech to businesses that it does to individuals and furthermore, why should/shouldn't it? Someone will probably argue that it is a person working for the business which is actually speaking BUT the key is they are speaking for the business, not for themself.

Re:No end to spam

[Frymaster]

people(Americans anyway) have the right to free speech as protected by the First Amendment

I can see how that relates to Spam... wasn't it Jackson who said "Give me Liberty or Give Me All Teen XXX Babes Live!!!!!"?

I hope the patent stands!

[stevens]

I hope many, many means of spamming are discovered and patented! Then there will be:

• a disincentive for others to use that way of spamming, and
• organizations (spammers themselves) suing other spammers to stop spamming in certain, infringing ways!

I say, let the spammers make it as hard as they can for each other. No skin off our nose, and it may actually reduce the amount of spam out there.

Steve

Wow! What a useful feature

[anticypher]

The ability to send an email to a computer, have it erase its hard drive, send out additional emails so you know it was successful, and then stop the machine from working.

Oh, wait! We already have that :-)

Its called M$ Outlook.

I understand Pitr is working on a linux port this week :-)

the AC