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Star Trek's Next Series
Moogle writes "Trektoday has got photographs of the Series V cast up. They also explain about Paramount's announcement that the new series will be called "Enterprise" and have Scott Bakula in the lead role. for the full shebang" Every episode the captain and his crew will beam (surrounded by a blue light) to a new time and space where they will encounter strange new intelligence and fight them. Oh wait, that would be cool. They'll probably have touchy feely pseudo-philosophy crap and hardly any explosions.
Okay, I just have to do it: "Cap'n, our servers canna take much more o' this" Damn Slashdot effect.
Scott Bakula's character will "possess" the body of a different Star Trek captain each week, trying to right some of the wrongs that have happened over the years.
First episode, he possesses Kirk's body and prevents him from obtaining an inappropriate hair weave.
Next episode has him entering Jean-Luc Picard's body and basically has a non-stop banging session with Beverly Crusher and Tasha Yar (pre-mortem of course).
There is a "very special" episode planned for when he becomes Janeway, but I'm not sure of the details. Possibly something to do with menstruation, but it could be anything.
Praying for the end of your wide-awake nightmare.
to have one shot careers, to get bad hair pieces and expose our large guts by wearing tight spandex uniforms, to spend our retirement selling airplane tickets and selling autographs to the socially-starved pantheon of the great unwashed, and to promote a niave political punch of social commentary worthy of the Love Boat and yet firmly laced with the accademic socialist tripe that appeals to the unemployed, and finaly to boldy go were we've been for the past 30 years.
Someone you trust is one of us.
Okay... Give me a second to put all thoughts of 'Quantum Leap' and 'Unecessary Roughness' out of my head. Now I'm putting all thoughts of 'Voyager' out of my head. Okay...
Okay...
Bakula is a good TV actor, one that I'm afraid will never really manage the leap to the silver screen because he keeps taking CRAP roles. This could be a very good move for him. That said, from what I've heard, this has the potential to be tons better than Voyager.
What would be really cool would be if Paramount got their heads out of their asses and realized that they were writing science fiction rather than political commentary.
Yeah, there is room for the former in the latter, but I'd *really* like to see a non-PC Trek universe when the Prime Directive was more of a guideline, female starship personell all wore skirts that showed their asses, and starship captains weren't afraid to throw down and open up the occasional can of phaser-powered whupass.
I want to see racism. I want to see sexism. I want to see the captain of the show bag all the cute alien hotties. I want facepaint rather than creative nose ridges.
And... like a previous poster put it, I want explosions. Lots of explosions. This is supposed to be the Star Trek equivalent of the old west, so lets get some kick-ass space dogfights going on.
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Did you just bitch about too many time travel episodes on Voyager and lack of a Dr. Who revival in the same message, and get modded up as insightful?
:-)
remember this series' time is before even Kirk's era
Does that mean they'll go back to the old-style Klingons?
awe, c'mon. WHen you deduct all the episodes that "never happned", it was only 3 years . . .
hawk
Oh lordy! Somebody mod this guy up, please...
Of course, it begs the following speculation: If prime numbered trek series are good, and divisible treks are bad...
Trek 7: 'The Spacefight Club' - This series will be composed almost entirely of starship dogfights in space, with some minor plot thrown in to appease the critics. Alien hottie flesh will be in abudance.
Trek 9: 'What Starship Captains Want' - Female and 'sensitive' male starfleet officers will particpate in a romantic comedy set entirely inside Starfleet headquarters. There will occasionally be futuristic matte paintings in the background depicting a futuristic earth, but there won't be any action or fight scenes.
Trek 13: 'Starfleet Tactics' - Series written by Tom Clancy. This one will be a little more 'intellectual' than previous Treks, but will focus on political machinations, espionage, technical and scientific detail, and large-scale starship battles. Action will not be plentiful, but it will be frequent, and well written. Critics will hail it as a 'sleeper hit'.
Treks 14-16: Will nearly bankrupt Paramount due to the casting of David Spade, Tom Green, and Britney Spears as starship captains.
Trek 17: Will be filmed using a combination of live action, full-scale starship models that really explode, and state-of-the-art quantum computer-based animation. The series will depict a life-or-death struggle in space and on Earth for the future of humanity, with generous dashes of action, sex, comedy, and gratuitous explosions. Due to the damages incurred wiping out the City of San-Francisco with a neutron explosion for the grand finale of the series, Paramount will go bankrupt.
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I wouldn't mind a decent show in the Star Trek universe, but why is everyone so stuck on having the main characters in Starfleet? Even the guy up above who had a great idea about doing a short-story style of Star Trek ala Outer Limits limited his idea to "changing to different Federation bridges".
Screw Starfleet! I wanna merchant/smuggler/criminal Klingon/Romulan/whatever vessel, or even just a bunch of people who hitch rides all over the Star Trek universe. Maybe they'll have a mad-on for Starfleet due to bad experiences (or because they ARE criminals), and do their best to screw over Starfleet any chance they get.
The cast could be majorly disfunctional, unlike the goody-two-shoes Starfleet members, and major stories could be written about them getting themselves out of messes that they got themselves into. Instead of figuring out a good solution, their first response is to run like hell - and if they're cornered, they maim & destroy with lots of viciousness.
I have a mental image of a female Klingon "captain" who's drunk most of the time & regards the male members of the crew (of any race) as her personal harem (as they maneuver to avoid being left alone with her). (Maybe that's too much of a comedy...)
Prime Directive? When there's money to be made & peaceful civilizations to exploit? It is to laugh...
Personally, I'm really interested in watching at least the first episode of this show. Yes, it's a Rick Berman series, so by precedent, it's going to suck. Or will it? I don't know, I'm sure Rick Berman surfs the Web, and you don't have to do much deep digging to learn that most would-be Trekkies think Voyager is total crap. Also, I like how Bakula will be adding creative input to the script. From what I've seen on Quantum Leap, he's really quite a talented actor, and knows how to get a character across, give him depth, and draw you into the character's own world for a while. So while there's a chance that it may suck royally, I really do want to see what they've got in store for us.
:)
That being said, what I really want to know is how they're going to explain how technology suddenly takes a nosedive somewhere during the 21st century. There's WWIII, true, so maybe they'll play that up. ST:FC did make mention of a large chunk of the population being killed off. Still, though, if you think back to ST:TOS, their technology was pretty cheesy... They actually used an analog rollback odometer counter as one of their displays, their computer had AI capabilities to recognize and process human speech, but couldn't seem to generate a voice that wasn't a monotone Flash-Gordon/Dr.-Who-era drone. Also, the sets were boxy as hell, and had more pastel colors than the depth of suburban hell in the 1950s. I'm really curious to know how they're going to explain what happened to technology and what happened between now and ST:TOS to make space travel as campy as it was
But of course, that's just my $0.02
/* Steve */
"Every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part that wonders what the part that isn't thinking isn't thinking of"-TMBG