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Game-development on Compaq iPaq
kilaasi writes "Some hard-core game-developers from Finland is making super-optimized games for the iPaq and similar devices, tweaking and tuning every bit of piece there is. These are old Commodore and Amiga-programmers that know the virtues of small-is-beautifull."
Some hard-core game-developers from Finland is making
I'm also an English speaking American who realizes that proper grammar is beautiful too.
Rob Malda wasn't exactly an old pro at masturbation (mortified to do it at home ever since his mom found his jitrag and almost had a heart attack) but was working his way up the amateur ranks out at college with not much else to do, having once again failed his saving throw vs. pathetic geekdom.
Even the embarassment that was getting his diminuitive penis lodged in an olive-oil filled beaker was a mere prelude to the incident that would give him his nickname forever. Perusing alt.sex.masturbation after he'd mauled himself one afternoon while his roommate was still out, he came upon a life-changing post: the most realistic sex sensation, ever, guaranteed. Dozens of replies verifying that this was indeed the best thing since sliced bread assuaged his fears that this would turn into another Beaker Incident. So for the first time ever, Rob set out to the hardware store, and then to the supermarket for some liver.
When he burst back into his room, visibly excited, his roommate began to cruelly inquire about why he had some piping and liver. Malda blurted out some half-assed explaination about "Maxwell's Demon" and "passive heating". He laughed and headed on out to "throw some brews back and nail some broads". Malda waited until he was convinced that he was gone, then snuck down to the microwave to heat up the liver. Sprinting with the foul organ in tow back to his room, he stuffed the liver into the PVC pipe and then stuffed his foul organ inside of it. The sensation of his homebrewed artificial vagina was so aazing that he did it four more times that evening, finally passing out with the semen-laced liver-stuffed pipe leaking all manner of horrible fluids leaking onto his sheets. With a start, he woke in the middle of the night, scrambling furiously to hide the pipe, dispose of the seed-covered liver, and then wash his sheets. His roommate and stumbled in while he was washing the sheets, and cruelly inquired if he'd shat the bed or what. He responded that he'd had a bit too much to drink and had puked on it. He shoved him aside and passed out.
So Malda's love affair with a pipe and some liver continued unabated, and things were going well: in one of his art classes, he'd even managed to tell a girl that he was a comp sci major and an art minor. After the 15 second talk, he returned to his room high on life and ready for a few rounds with the liverpipe, and so thought nothing of it when his roommate invited him over to dinner at his friend's place. He accepted, did his pipe, cleaned up and then took a shower before heading out.
He showed up at six prompt, and they began by cracking open a few Coronas and watching some TV. It was Mexican night, they informed him. Nachos and tacos: what would he like? Tacos, he responded.
At the dinner table (OK, huddled around the TV), Malda was talking with excitement in his voice about how he'd unearthed some of his old disks with shareware classics like Duke Nuke 'Em, Jumpman, Tapper and Commander Keen on them and had been playing them all afternoon. One of the guys snickered and he asked if they weren't into old games.
"*snicker* Hey, uh. Guys. Do these tacos taste a little funky to you?"
"*snicker* Yeah, a little bit."
Rob looked around, not quite getting the gist of it and responded "These taste fine. Why?"
As his roommate burst out laughing, one of the guys said "Yeah. I sort of... ran out of meat and I had to make your tacos with this piece of meat I found in the garbage near your roommate's room. But don't worry. It was all wrapped up and so it wasn't dirty... COMMANDER TACO!!"
It was then, with a sinking feeling in his stomach, that he realized that he'd been fed a piece of liver that he'd been intimate with only hours before. He ran out of the apartment crying and failed his classes for the rest of the semester, eventually finding the he managed to graduate in 4 1/2 years.
Now you reporters know, so quit asking, and move on to questions about VA Li^H^H Software already.
Easy does it!
This comment has been submitted already, 276865 hours , 59 minutes ago. No need to try again.
I just heard some sad news on talk radio - Horror/Sci Fi writer Stephen King was found dead in his Maine home this morning. There weren't any more details. I'm sure everyone in the Slashdot community will miss him - even if you didn't enjoy his work, there's no denying his contributions to popular culture. Truly an American icon.
Yay, Finnish programmers are open sourcing there assembly code. l00ny_bastard has a point to make about, uhhhh, ummmm, uhh how Finntrolls are teaming up with the NSA,Microsoft,bin Laden, and Linus to overtake the open source PDA community with their proprietary "demos". l00ny_bastard is a genius who is our only hope against these EVIL finns.
Use these tips and you will certainly join the ranks of the highly-moderated, +2 auto-posters. And we all know just how important it is to be a member of that group, don't we? ;)
Right, troll. I don't anything better to do than troll slashdot.
Just because it was an early comment doesn't make it a troll, and just because you don't find it funny doesn't mean it's offtopic.
Why don't you go moderate my ass instead of wasting my Karma on your petty spite?
*THAT* was a Troll.