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Ultimate Stem Cell Discovered
bofh31337 writes "Newscientist is reporting that the University of Minnesota has discovered a new stem cell in adults. It is thought this stem cell will be able to turn into any single tissue in the body." The article is kinda breathy, especially for New Scientist - but if this is true, which needs to be studied more, this will dramatically alter the landscape for stem cell research.
This could put a whole new twist on toys in the genre of Sea Monkeys and Chia pets. Can I grow my boss or my professor in a petri dish and then torture them without any legal ramifications?
The perfect new meme: Please don't clone the trolls..
REUTERS, MARCH 5 The University of Minnesota has been granted a patent for what it calls 'The Ultimate [human] Stem Cell'.
It is now illegal for humans to generate this cell, or invoke its capabilities to develop into any human tissue, without a license from the University of Minnesota.
Expectant mothers and fathers, upon confirmation of pregnancy, will be asked to sign a Universal Stem Cell End User License Agreement, and pay an annual license fee.
Healing of disease, and repair of damaged body tissues, will incur special levies.
Any use of Universal Stem Cells in any bodily function will result in substantial fines, possible jail terms, and compulsory MRI scans and biopsies for the forced removal of offending cells from the bodies of perpetrators.
You have been warned!
-- In the beginning was the WORD, and the WORD was UNSIGNED, and the main(){} was without form and void...
One other very promising source of stem cells is from liposuction
This is GREAT NEWS!!!
I know of a great many people with plentiful supplies of fat cells that would be raring to go, donating them to science, or to helping to replicate a new liver. Heh, especially after the liver got so trashed in conjunction with the accumulation of a massive beer belly (see, it all fits together).
"Provided by the management for your protection."
Hey, you've got extra need for stem cells, come on here, we make a deal. If you buy 2 pounds, you get the third pound half price. Good deal, eh?
Oh no! Microsoft has released a new product! It's a conspiracy, they want to dominate the world, it has security holes and crashes a lot. Microsoft sucks, Linux rules! Linux is great, and everyone should use it! Free software forever!
There are many types of fundamentalism my friend.
This article is more proof that the liberals decrying the goverment's reasonable restrictions on ESC's are morons. If this research proves true (and that's an IF) ECS would be unnecessary.
Any biologists out there care to explain what aging looks like on the cellular level?
Their cillia starts to fall out in the front, or in a circular patch over their oral pore. They get a lot more moody, and thinner, and they tend to say lots of things like "Eh, my endoplasmic reticulum isn't what it used to be!", and "In my day, they didn't teach Mitosis in school, you just learned about it the hard way!" If the cells can afford it, they try to move south for their last days, which explains the appearance of some higher mammals...
Yeah, here's your embryo. MURDER! MURDER! I can see a face in that right cell!
I can have a second penis. Thank you science!
"What is the sound of one belly slapping?"
Stupid Fundies.
But, damn; stem cells from adults? We murdered all those unborn people for nothing? Well, there's always Planned Parenthood...