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Genetically Modified Mouthwashing Bacteria

Posted by timothy on from the wash-your-mouth-out-with-bugs dept.

Moxen writes: "The BBC is running an article about a genetically modified bacterium that is intended to replace the existing lactic-acid-producing variety currently residing in your mouth. Once the new bacteria have replaced the old, you can apparently expect the elimination of 'most tooth decay.' Rather clever, if you don't mind playing host to a colony of GMOs."

6 of 47 comments (clear)

  1. At last! by dhopton · · Score: 2, Funny

    This is somethign that all computer people need. Anything that lessens the time that a computer person has to spend away from their keyboard, the better. I for one welcome this, since brushing of the teeth is something that I have to try very hard to remember.

  2. Re:What do you get instead of lactic acid? by linuxator · · Score: 3, Funny

    Alcohol ;) :P

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    * Origin: XBase BBS (2:490/4100) Well the good old days may not return and rocks might melt and sea may burn.
  3. just wait... by doooras · · Score: 3, Funny

    until it mutates from mouthwashing bacteria to brainwashing bacteria. (which will then be patented by AOL Time Warner, of course)

  4. Re:This will never work :( by moncyb · · Score: 2, Funny

    Aaahhh...but you forget there will be errors (accidental or deliberate) in their genetic code. Just think--they'll be a notice to all those version 1.0 "users" that says "warning: there is a serious problem with v1.0 of our product. Please purchase v1.1, or your teeth will fall out, and you'll die within the year."

    After a decade or two, there will be a monopoly called Genetisoft led by a guy named Gill Bates. The justice department will be investigating why people who have the Genetisoft(TM) Mouthwash(TM) bacteria are only able to eat Genetisoft(TM) food, and use Genetisoft(TM) medical products.

    The courts will find that indeed Genetisoft(TM) is a monopoly, and as their punisment, they will find that Genetisoft(TM) must give free samples of their bacteria to all school children. The children will not be given a choice, of course, because the fight against tooth decay is a national initiative.

  5. Re:What do you get instead of lactic acid? by loydcc · · Score: 2, Funny
    I wish we had symbiotic bacteria that would live in me and feed me with all sorts of cool drugs. Immagine if athletes foot fungus could produce psilocibin and put it directly into the blood stream. Or if the flu got you high. It would be like a man having big breasts. I'd never leave the house.

    It would also make antidrug laws a moot point. No honest officer I swear I got high by accident. I picked up this jock itch that causes ergotamine poisoning. Look at all the colors.

  6. Good, now can they make this? by PD · · Score: 3, Funny

    How about a variety of bacteria that doesn't produce scatane when it digests food? That would be wonderful. I would suggest that it could make some nice ketones instead, so our farts could smell like bananas or something.

    --
    If tits were wings it'd be flying around.