Amazon & Barnes and Noble Settle One-Click Dispute
rtphokie writes: "C|Net is reporting that Amazon.com and Barnes&Noble.com have settled the over 2 year old lawsuit over the expedited ordering process known as '1-Click' ordering on Amazon's site and 'Express Checkout' on Barnes and Noble's. Details of the settlement are (of course) unavailable."
I guess the half-click people are somewhat slow. It's hard to get things done when you're busy holding the mouse button down with one hand.
Amazon's Top Lawyer: Look, we know you guys want to do the whole 'One-Click' thing. But we got a patent on it. We have to protect it. How would we look to other companies if we didn't? Like big wussies, that's how we'd look.
B&N's Top Lawyer: But your patent is too broad and ill-defined. You knew you were taking advantage of the patent office's ignorance toward technology. And we're pissed off enough about it to get it over-turned. And if you think inactivity would make you look like wussies, over-turning your patents is going to make you look like money-grubbing vampires.
ATL: We don't have to go through this, you know. You could just pay a nominal license fee...
BNTL: Yeah, and you could lick my #expletive#.
ATL: Oh come on, is that really necessary? It wouldn't hurt your bottom line in the least.
BNTL: It's the principal of the thing.
ATL: Ok, then. What's your idea of a compromise?
BNTL: Ideally, all of you out of a job. But since it's not an ideal world, how about this: We don't pay a license fee and do the 'One-Click' thing anyway.
ATL: Alright, alright. But only if you sign an agreement to never co-operate with, testify for or help any other company we come down on to protect this patent.
BNTL: Only if Bezos goes public and says he's in favor of patent reform.
Bezos: What?!?
ATL: You've GOT to be kidding.
BNTL: Nope. And say it like you mean it.
<Some general grumbling on the Amazon side of the table>
ATL: Deal. But don't ever have the same book of the month as we do!
BNTL: We've got no problem with that.
<End scene>
My sigs always suck.