Slashdot Mirror
Gum Chewing Found to Boost Brainpower, Memory
rohis writes: "Reuters health has a story about effect of Chewing Gum on thinking, memory and other subjects
here based on the research by University of Northumbria and the Cognitive Research Unit.The experiments involved 75 people split into groups of non-chewers, real chewers and "sham" chewers. Short term memory was tested and found to improve for real chewers."
check the time difference between when this story was posted by timothy and when the last story was posted, and you know exactly how much editors research before posting...
Are we really expected to pay any attention to a test involving only 3 groups of 25 test subjects? The odds of this being anyway accurate must be minute. A simple survey generally requires a little over 1000 people to get a 95/5 accuracy and yet these fools publish data where they claim from a group of 75 people that chewing gum makes you smarter. Could someone please teach these people about conducting proper scientific research (as if their premice wasnt ridiculous anyway).
Slashdot: Proof that a million monkeys at a million typewriters can create a masterpiece
The fact that insulin helps memory is old news, so is the fact that exercise help memory. (these are the two tentative conclusions of the article.)
Nicotine, as a stimulant, is also known to do these things. So, perhaps frantically chewing Nicorettes during a test ought to help even more. (Unless you're a non-smoker, in which case you're likely to simultaneously vomit and keel over, thus gaining a medical reason for which to take a test over. Either way, you win!)
My only question is who the hell gave them a grant to do this, and what silly assed professor approved?Importantly, this is another Useless Fact (tm) that can be bandied about when one needs to convince an imbecile of that which is common sense.
As for why the group wasn't bigger, more scientific, "pretend gum", etc., well, I'm sure the reason was that the study, being an exercise in proving common sense, wasn't going to attract the biggest grants, corporate sponsorships, etc.
No worry. It has served its purpose. I have printed out the article and shall leave it on the desk of a co-worker who always complains about my minty-fresh breath.
So, from like four feet away: "Jeeeee-zuz! Were you gargling pure methyl salicylate again?"
Fine. My breath smells like laboratory-grade oil of wintergreen. I'm nice enough not to tell him that his smells remarkably similar to the inside of sewage treatment plant's slurry pump.
Fire and Meat. Yummy.
Not long ago I found myself working two jobs. I had to get out of bed rather earlier than I was used to and tended to start the day pretty groggy. I don't drink coffee (upsets my stomach) so I needed another solution to perk me up in the AM. I found that chewing gum worked incredibly well. After chewing on a piece for about ten minutes I felt far more awake and alert, and the effect seemed to last long after the stuff went in the trash.
;-)
So I started thinking. I'm a horse person, I have half a dozen of the beasts. Horses are programmed to chew. It's believed that the muscles involved in the chewing process actually help pump the blood through all the vessels in their head. Without the chewing action during grazing blood would tend to pool in the horse's head. After my gum chewing revelation I wondered if a similar principle might apply in humans. It seems logical that increased blood flow could lead to an increased feeling of alertness.
Or maybe I was just high on minty freshness!
In a breakthrough today, scientists working for MacDonalds revealed that eating two Big Macs a day makes the human male appear "sexy" and "charming" to females of that species. While preliminary testing points to the special sauce as the active ingredient, some scientists still insist that it's the love put into each sandwich by a dedicated MacDonalds employee that transforms a regular man into a "hunk of burning love."