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Microsoft's $40 Billion On Hand

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the now-thats-an-eye-opener dept.

eMilkshake writes "CNN/Money magazine report here that Microsoft has more liquid reserves than 'Ford, ExxonMobil and Wal-Mart have combined' and 'enough to buy the entire airline industry -- twice. Or all the gold in Fort Knox, four times over. It is enough to buy 23 space shuttles or every major professional baseball, basketball, football and hockey team in America.' This is thanks to (according to WinInfo Update) the fact that 'Microsoft handles its investments with an inhouse software application called--seriously--the Catastrophe Hedging Program 2.5.' I wonder what I would do with $40 billion?"

15 of 789 comments (clear)

  1. frost pist by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    And boy oh boy does it hurt. I mean, seriously...

    1. Re:frost pist by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      Props to all AC fp'ers...

    2. Re:frost pist by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      SUCK MY ASS JUICE

  2. All the gold in fort Knox. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    You can't have sex with all the gold in Fort Knox, but you can have sex with a mare

  3. Yes, but... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    can you imagine a beowulf cluster of these?

    I just put that out there to show you how LAME it is whenever you say that about new computers, etc. Just stop it, for the sake of the children. Jackass.

  4. LUNIX SUCKS!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    LUNIX SUCKS!!!

  5. Re:Breaking News!!!! Extra Extra!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Susie Plunkit

  6. Point of order... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    This story really should have been saved for troll Tuesday.


    That being said, my theory is that Bill's white cat really wants a litterbox on Mars.

  7. Wait a second.... by iamcadaver · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    How the hell does Congress justify a corporate welfare bailout of the airline industry to the tune of twice the value of the entire industry??

    --
    Before I part with'em: two pennies weigh ~4.996+/-0.014g, have a zinc core, and the face of Lincoln. You can keep 'em.
  8. Re:Wow by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    no, they have a 10th of a penny

  9. "I wonder what I would do with $40 billion?" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Buy a damn beowulf cluster of something...

  10. Re:What to do with $40e9? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    nah, mars is cooler than feeding rice to some skinny negros with aids.

  11. nice smiley by tps12 · · Score: 1, Offtopic
    =]

    Your tasteful noseless smiley belies your poor character as indicated by your plebeian taste in liquor.

    For those who are wondering, the answer is "yes".

    The question is, "will one ever be able to obtain an easy to use and open source tool for removing excess noses from smileys?" Stay tuned for more info. Such a thing does exist, and will hopefully be publicly released soon, though beta versions have been floating around slashdot for a few days now.

    --

    Karma: Good (despite my invention of the Karma: sig)
  12. *does a double take* by Akardam · · Score: 1, Offtopic

    Was I the only one who read that as "Microsoft's $40B Hard On"?

    Damn. It's too early. *goes to get his coffee*

  13. Re:What to do with 40 billion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    nah, just shoot the kiwis. you can buy better slaves.

    a kiwi will get no work done while eyeing off the wild sheep.