Soda Machines for Geeks?

PhaseBurn writes "In all my findings, I've yet to see things like Bawls or Jolt in a soda machine. Even bottled water is hard to come by... Working in a call center for an ISP, we don't have to worry too much about what's popular with the rest of the world, and so, I'm tasked with finding a vending machine replete for geeks. While Jolt can come out of any normal soda machine that supports plastic bottles, the glass Bawls bottles woultn't fare so well. Do they make a soda machine that would work for this? What's around your office... And what's popular among the geeks today, as I want it to appeal to the vast majority of our staff?" Why use a vending machine when a community cooler would work just as well. With that aside, what kind of beverages would you like to see more of in vending machines?

Comments

Special Geek Beverages

[recursiv]

I'm a geek, but I don't need to have my special geek beverages just to prove it. And as far as water goes, the water fountain (bubbler if you prefer) suits me fine.

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[TheRedHorse]

I agree. I don't think any true geek needs a special drink or sticker or t-shirt or anything to prove that he or she is a geek.

But if you want drinks like Bawls here's what you need to do:

1. Buy a large fridge

2. Buy Bawls online at thinkgeek

3. Set up repeat shipments using Scheduled Delivery

4. Plug Fridge into power outlet somewhere near work area, keep stocked with Bawls.

That's it, you can choose when to start your shipments, how often to send shipments, etc. Everything will work as long as you keep you shipping and billing info current.

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[pheonix]

Excellent point... I'm getting sick of the stupidity that plagues the ask slashdot questions recently... I mean, what beverages are geeky enough for geeks? Which pets are geeky enough? Which laptops are geeky enough? Even how do you be geeky enough with a SO? Come on people, if you don't have a real question, don't bother sending it. If you need to know how to handle your girlfriend, ask Ann Landers. If you want to know what car to buy, go to Car and Driver. Oh well... maybe it's just me being tired, but it seems a bit ridiculous that so many people are suddenly asking themselves, AM I GEEKY ENOUGH? Buy an identity...

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[RevAaron]

I don't know about you man, but I'd be pissed if everyone got their Bawls for free in a company paid-for fridge. I mean, get some variety at least. Coke. Mt. Dew. Jolt. Beamish Stout. Dr. Slice. Those seem to be other "geek" drinks. That's probably because "geeks" drink the same stuff everyone else does.

Even better, skip the Bawls. It's over-priced. Keep a bunch of lemon-lime soda, grenadine, and freebase caffeine powder [1] on hand, perhaps even mix it for everyone in a pitcher. Throw in a couple sliced oranges for a zesty citrus surprise. Hell, you could have various levels of caffeine per 12-oz glass, 0 mg to 100. Why not?

At work, we have a water fountain and it works great. You know, one of those 5 gallon glug-glug-gluggers of purified water in a bottle, connected upside down to a fountain that dispenses very cool and hot-enough-for-tea water. Can't lose with one of those.

[1] Pure caffeine can be easily isolated from caffeine tablets or ordered from chemical suppliers. Damn cheap.

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[RevAaron]

Indeed. Pretty much everyone likes to feel like they belong. Some of us are lame enough to work towards being a part of a very inclusive group like the "geeks" that they have to make sure to get "geeky" shit. Whatever, whatever splits your bananna.

It's called High School Clique syndrome. You know, the punks, goths, and raver kids that champion individuality, make fun of all the "preps" who "try so hard to fit it" and at the same time, put so much effort into fitting in with their little club.

Not saying it's bad, it's just what humans do, I suppose.

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[RevAaron]

Heh. I was going to make some of that for my girlfriend, who was starting to drink a SoBe Energy Drink (caffeinated 5-Alive) every morning.

There are a lot of places that provide "research" chemicals online. A lot typically provide to businesses, but can be kajoled into selling to an individual. Also, there are a handful of companies which sell smaller quantities directly to curious consumers. Caffeine is among various Tryptamines, DXM HBr, and others.

Just make sure to get Food or Technical Grade Caffeine powder, which implies a certain (almost 100%) percentage of purity.

As per the tablets, more than just smashing them up. However, that would work, you would just be drinking 3 grams of cornstarch or binder. If it dissolves and doesn't tastebad, I suppose it's not a big deal. Otherwise, if it doesn't dissolve in water, you could extract via water, perhaps 1 tablet per oz- then strain out the binders. You then could take this liquid and add it to a big 20 oz OJ. :) It would be a lot better on your teeth and stomache than coffee or even tea.

There are much better methods, I've seen plenty of extraction procedures in HS/Intro College chemistry. Google around for "caffeine isolation" or something. Probably find info on isolating it from soda and tea as well.

Re:Special Geek Beverages

[Wakko Warner]

I'm getting sick of every single fucking Ask Slashdot question having more replies of "Dur, this is a stoopid question!" and "What are j00, some kind of moron?" rather than an actual exchange of information.

Have you ever stopped to consider that perhaps the reason that no meaningful exchange of information occurs in this section of slashdot is because the questions being asked here of late are completely inane?

Ask slashdot used to be good. The questions used to be intriguing and required a little more thought thank simply linking to a fucking Google search. Nowadays, they're just Slashdot-Retarded, thoughtless ponderances with as much conversation potential as a pile of dogshit. "What kind of electric dork cars are there?" USE GOOGLE. "What kind of laptops have good linux driver support?" USE GOOGLE. "Where can I get good geek shit for my right hand^W^Wgirlfriend?" SHUT UP, ASK A REAL FUCKING QUESTION, AND USE GOOGLE!

It's hard to engender any sort of worthwhile conversation when the only answers you can really give are pointers to websites. There hasn't been a thought-provoking question on Ask Slashdot in months.

- A.P.

Mmmm... tea

[Copperhead]

One of the more popular traditions I've started at my office is the 3:30 teatime. A nice cup of Earl Grey with fellow programmers about non-work related subjects (strictly enforced!) is perfect for breaking up the boring afternoon.

The obvous programmer drink...

[ralian]

Beer. Lots of it.

What there should be in there

[Anonymous Coward]

Condoms - for scoring the new helpdesk chick before she realises you are a geek.

Whisky - for dealing with people who have no idea about using a computer.

Caffeine Pills - for running the helldesk late at night.

Bananas - In case a management type fella visits the area.

Deodourant - because geeks always forget that sort of thing.

Post It (tm) Notes - for attaching to the machine when it breaks down.

CD-Rs of mp3s - for those boring times in between.

AK47 - for those stress related shootings.

Mold - to make a geek feel right at home.

Pizza - Dead cold and with extra cheese.

H2O!!!

[EvlG]

I don't know why more people don't go for the old standby, water.

I used to be a heavy soda drinker, consuming at least 5 every work day. One day, I didn't have enough change to buy sodas, and I drank water all day.

I can not adequately describe how much better I felt, and how much more productive I was. I felt like my whole body was just flushed out, especially my brain.

Ever since, I have only gone for a soda when I need a really quick rush of sugar or calories. This is usually true in the last hour or two before I head home to eat dinner.

Try drinking nothing but water for an entire week at work, and see if you find yourself feeling better and thinking better as I did.

Re:H2O!!!

[iankerickson]

And tea is a good middle-ground between soda and water. No jitters or stomach problems like people get with soda or coffee. Ironically, it's cheaper than either, as long as you don't buy the overpriced yuppie-oriented brands like you see in coffee shops. You're talking about bottled water, right? People drink everything but tap water because most tap water is disgusting (whether or not it's any different than what you get in a bottle). If you live where the tap water is clear, clean, and free of clorine, you're pretty lucky.

If you're addicted to caffienated soda or coffee, you can wean yourself off of it without the withdrawal symptoms (bad headache, being disoriented, mood swings) by switching to tea. Two tea bags, 1/3 cups of sugar, some lemon or lime juice (very little), and a quart of boiling water in thermos makes something as powerfull as Mountain Dew. The sugar thickens the mix to get a similar consistency to uncarbonated soda. I used to make tea so strong that it scared my co-wokers who tried it. If you learn how to do it right, there's nothing weak or bitter about good tea. I've backed off on it to a more conservative recipe, but it's something that's cheap to experiment with. It's true you can make a tea that's as bad for you as soda or coffee, but there's nothing stopping you from adjusting the strength of it over time, which you can't really do with coffee or soda.

Don't leave the tea bags in more than three to five minutes (it varies with how hot the water is and the container) or it will be too bitter. Or get an iced tea recipe off the web. Or just pour the tea (after it's brewed for 5 minutes) into a metal or glass pitcher and leave it in the fridge overnight. (Rubber or plastic pitchers leave an aftertaste in the tea). For cold tea, you can make huge batches in advance on the weekend with little extra effort (making tea is a procedure that "scales up"). Adjust the ingredients until you find a mix you like, as the proportions make a big difference in the final product.

You can save a lot of money over time this way. I think I was losing an easy $2 a day on soda. I did the math on what it costs to buy tea, lemon juice, and sugar, now that I've bought the thermos, it's less than 25 cents a day. I don't know if you can get bottled water that cheaply (because I hate the plastic taste in bottled water). I don't find tea as addictive as soda either, so it's not like you're trading one craving for another.

For your vending machine, think about making a hot water tap available for people to use, and maybe an ice machine too. That way they can make hot or cold tea at work, if they don't want to or forget to make it at home. Some places go so far as to supply the tea bags and sugar, but it doesn't sound like you can do that.

Obligatory Simpsons quote

[phillymjs]

Tea (get one of those sets with all sorts of flavors)

Krabappel: "What kind of little boy has a tea set?"
Skinner: "I think we both know the answer to that. A LUCKY boy!"