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Linuxbierwanderung Among The Heather
yalla writes: "After being in Pottenstein, Coniston and Bouillon, the Linuxbierwanderung is taking Place in Doolin, Ireland. As every year, we're holding lectures, take a lot of hikes and obvisiously enjoy the local beer. This time we even got our own beer: The 'Black Tux' (Stout), 'Reddish Brown Beer' (Red Ale) and the 'Holy Penguin Pee' (which is a Lager). The beer was sponsored by the Irish Linux User Group. Our network setup is sort of weird, like last year; we connected the camping-site via wireless LAN and directional antennas with 'The Hall,' the local community center, which is the central gathering place for all activities."
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... BE VERY CAREFUL. Flash photography may be seen as an act of agression, and could even have harmful effects on the aliens. The use of a tripod might also be confused with a dangerous weapon.
Useful Advice:
1. Do not touch or attempt to touch a UFO that has landed. Passing through the Earth's atmosphere the skin of the craft will be hot. There is also a possibility of radiation. There is also a chance of steam being produced from the heated hull at the landing site.
2. Do not stand under a hovering UFO at low altitude. There is a possibility of radiation danger.
3. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO CONTACT ALIENS if they appear, any movement on your part may constitute an act of aggression. If possible, back away VERY slowly. Make no gestures what so ever.
4. Note the shape and size of the craft, use nearby objects for a size comparison.
5. If you can take some photographs but
6. Do not touch any artifact from an alien spacecraft, the artifact may be dangerous, leave this to the authorites.
7. Do not attempt sex with the aliens. Alien fluids might have acid or other undesirables. by TrollBurger #575126
8. Get away from the area QUICKLY. Inform the local authorites or the military.
9. If you a wound or illness, present it to the aliens in a manner that shows you are hurt. Many aliens have healing powers in their appendages. by scotch #102596
10. Do not attempt to shoot at alien craft. Not only is this a direct act of agression, but many alien ships employ powerful sheilding which can deflect a bullet or shot directly towards you, which may lead to injuries.
Less Useful Advice:
1. Offer the aliens a burger. They've just been on a trip that must have taken many millions of lightyears, they're probably hungry. by TrollBurger #575126
2. Don't tell the aliens about Slashdot, Jerry Springer, and America. The aliens are probably trying to find intelligent life.
3. To aid future human/alien dialog, attempt to communicate the rotation period of an electron in a hydrogen atom, using dance. This is the intergalactic Roseta Stone.
4. Attempt to sneeze on the aliens. This is just to show that "War of the Worlds" was a CROCK OF SHIT!
5. Explain to them about area 51, and how we shot down, and experimented on one of their own. (THIS MIGHT BE DANGEROUS).
6. Offer to show them an anal probe (if you have one handy). (OPTIONAL)
7. If the alien seems upset, offer to rub its head gently. Not only will this ease a tense situation, it will bring you good luck. by scotch #102596
I can't wait for next week when we get told that this happened - it'll be like "The tenses for beginners!"
I'm so excited I'll end all of my sentences with an exclamation mark!
Most times I get nothing but slightly dizzy. Some times I can get a nice buzz - but it only lasts a few minutes. If I keep drinking I can stretch it out a little longer, but I can't seem to balance it out - either it fades away or turns unpleasant.
Marijuana is so much nicer, one or two puffs and I'm feeling great. I don't have to go to the bathroom every five minutes, and its much more economical.
WTF?! Are you some kind of camp counselor?!
Gah! Damn roommates...the joys of living with goat trolls.
http://www.sfu.ca/~hjohnson/osxnisnfs.html