Online Auctions Patented, eBay Sued

mattfusf writes "This article from News.com talks about a guy who has filed a lawsuit against eBay for patent infringment. Patent 5,845,265 covers a "method..for creating a computerized market for used and collectible goods""

Comments

You know

[Anonymous Coward]

Thomas Woolston could just auction those patents off on eBay. He'll make a killing and save on lawyer fees.

why don't I..

[Joel Ironstone]

patent method of acquiring money solely from exploiting patent institutions. In this way I can sue everyone who tries to sue anyone for patent infringement. I can even sue anyone who tries to sue me.

Re:why don't I..

[Anarchofascist]

I have already filed a patent for the business process which involves patenting a business process for filing a suit against anyone filing a suit for patent infringement.

And of course, before you think of it, I have also patented filing a patent for the business model of filing patents against people filing patents for any business process involving patenting a business process for filing a suit against anyone filing a suit for patent infringement.

If that's not perfectly clear, I think you should just pay up now and avoid dragging this thing through the courts :)

On second thoughts, I think I'll go away now and file a patent for the business model of patenting business models which are patents against the exploitation of business models. Or perhaps hire a good lawyer.

Another business method someone should patent

[Snarfangel]

"A method of sending out unsolicited mass electronic mailings to email addresses of individuals who have expressed absolutely no interest in the product or service being offered. Such 'spam' is to consist exclusively of worthless potions, creams, and pills for enlarging or reducing areas of the body, pyramid schemes to get rich quick, offers for clubs no one in their right mind would join, and letters from deposed heads of state begging you to help move money from poor African nations."

If only someone would patent *that* and sue the #$%@! out of all of the infringers!

Re:Please

[John Biggabooty]

I hold 26 patents, and you are all infringing on them. The following are my intellectual property, so stop using them without paying licencing: A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y, and Z. My patent for the comma is pending, so be ready to pay for that, too.

Re:I'll admit, I'm stupid.

[Ioldanach]

But am I missing something?

Patenting an online auction in my mind is akin to patenting the idea a selling milk in refrigerated display cases, ie,

What, you mean something like this patent?

Re:One more ...

[uncoveror]

It would cost Ebay a lot less than a fat legal settlement to have the Mafia deal with MercExchange, and Thomas Woolston. If only they were members of Prepaid Illegal Services, this never would have come to light.

Re:STOP WITH THE GAY-ASS PATENT JOKES YOU FUCKERS

[CarrionBird]

says the owner of patent #1282211112: Method for online trolling.

Ah, hindsight!

[melquiades]

Heck, come to think of it, I should have filed this one:

A patent for the use of patent law to claim ownership of broadly applicable and largely obvious and unoriginal ideas, thereby allowing the user of this patent to file frivolous suits against major corporations for personal monetary gain.

Judging from recent news, that patent would make a killing on eBay these days!

Alas, there's too much prior art now to file it -- unless, of course, the patent office were to start approving patents with no regard whatsoever for their validity....

Re:Patent Pending for New Business Model

[sacrilicious]

1) File patent
2) Sit back while patent is adopted
3) Sue the crap out of everyone
4) ???
5) Collect underpants!

.