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ATi's All In Wonder Radeon 9700 Pro

Posted by timothy on from the sound-of-expiring-ndas dept.

FlippedBit writes "ATi has taken the wraps off their latest Swiss Army Knife 3D Graphics Card with TV Tuner and Remote Control capabilities, that rival most discrete solutions. The All In Wonder Radeon 9700Pro packs a ton of A/V features and is driven by their new R300 VPU. HotHardware has a look at this new beast and all its bells and whistles, right here."

10 of 250 comments (clear)

  1. Warning to all males by Schik · · Score: 5, Funny

    Beware - owning this will be a DEAD giveaway that you have a very, very tiny penis.

    1. Re:Warning to all males by OrangeSpyderMan · · Score: 2, Funny

      Too true, I've heard girls really go for infected penis.

      --
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  2. Whoa... by fireboy1919 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Games. And TV.

    The latest All-in-Wonder Value edition has the thing they've been missing: beer. Yes, it actually has a small microbrewery/breakout box, so that your computer can be all that you need; it even does it by remote control.

    The full package includes an IV breakout box from which cola is fed interveinously (and blood removed), effectively eliminating any and all need to leave the computer for any reason whatsoever.

    The next edition is expected to be fully sentient, allowing those eccentric geeks who feel the need for friendship (for some strange reason). This new edition will be dubbed "All-in-Wonder: Heroin Edition," crediting the fact that heroin users want for nothing but the drug, just as All-in-Wonder users should want nothing else.

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  3. More powerfull than my graphics card by AstroMage · · Score: 2, Funny

    Gnashes his teeth and tears his hear out...
    Aaarrrggghhhh, only 3 months after I bought my latest and greatest GC, yet another one comes out which is better. I'm becoming obsolete... Sinking into oblivion... Nnnnnnnoooooo......!
    ;-)

  4. Re:more reviews here... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    If people are going to start telling the truth around here, then I'm going to bed.

  5. Re:So where's the Mac version? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I hate to sound like a whiner

    It's alright. Most Mac users are whiners.

  6. Re:You can take my nVidia card. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Yours likes it when I dump Kernels in her mouth.

    Thank god for 3rd shift computer babysitting jobs. Oh and capitalism for such a meaningful existence. Much better than nihilist existentialism. George Will is a good writer. Whooa, I better stop before I become intellectually dishonest.

  7. but you're not by Trepidity · · Score: 2, Funny

    You post on Slashdot, after all.

    --
    10 PRINT CHR$(205.5+RND(1)); : GOTO 10
  8. Bad drivers.... BAAAAAD! by Zakabog · · Score: 5, Funny

    If ATI were a Winston Cup NASCAR, we'd say that the company is efficiently firing on all eight cylinders.

    Jeez, if the Radeon was a car, it'd beat all the other car's in 1/4 mile times and top speed, but in a 500 lap race, at lap 200, the paint would peal, the doors would fall off, and the engine would fall out.

    Further, ATI's latest round of hardware has been complimented by relatively stable drivers - a first, as far as the gaming community is concerned.

    I hope they mean a first, as in, first time ATI released relatively stable drivers. What bother's me though is "Relatively stable drivers." well, stable in relation to what? In relation to a blind man balancing a chair on his nose while juggling chainsaws?

  9. Re:So where's the Mac version? by Alan+Partridge · · Score: 2, Funny

    no no, that's WINNERS

    --
    That was classic intercourse!