Slashdot Mirror
LOTR: The Two Towers
Let's try to mash all the LOTR submissions into one. Reviews: comingsoon.net,
Empire Online (UK), CNN, Slate, Salon. The LA Times has a story about animating Gollum which we can't link to because it requires registration. Lord Satri writes "Ents, elves and mages being on every orc's lips, new versions of
Tales Of
Middle-Earth are available. It is an open source, one
player and online
multiplayer game. It is ported
to many OS's. Yeah, no terrific graphics, but the game is
really worthwhile. It is based on the famous roguelike Angband
(variants here). Faithful to Tolkien's writings."
we love the mpaa, we hate the mpaa, we love the mpaa, we hate the mpaa...
wasn't it just yesterday we talked about a boycott?
Runnin' On Empty
The fact that despite it being very poor he can still be regarded as some sort of cimema god, that's what. He clearly had not even read FotR when the first film was done and his interviews display a total lack of understanding or interest of the source material. Astonishing is the word.
TWW
"Encyclopedia" is to "Wikipedia" what "Library" is to "Some people at a bus stop"
THE WORST MOVIE EVER. 3 & 1/2 hours of SHIT is why it ain't gunna make money!
No Stars. Let me say that movie sucked more dick the Ishtar. The editing was worse than Episode I.
a. IF your going to ass-fuck a book choose a worse one to do it to than the Two Towers.
b. Faramir was NOT an asshole in the book.
c. There are 6 parts in the book, 3 for each set of characters. 1 run across the plains, 2 meet and great the Rohan & fight at Helms Deep, 3 confront Saruman. (Wow this movie sucked, just had to put it in) Not Run circle jerk and wax lyrical get a visit from the Elves and dream of your bitch. for the other half... 1 Marshes, 2 Friends with Faramir (one of the most humane of the humans in the book) 3 Go to the Morgul vail and fight Shelob granddaughter of Ungalant. Not Marshed, go to Gondor almost fall tothe Wraiths and then end of MOVIE! Fuck is Jackson too weak to end the movie where to book ends? Um YES. What an ASSHOLE!!!!!
d. Glorfindle didn't go to Helms Deep and sure as fuck didn't die there. He's a high elf, he went to Valinor, he at least 80% as bad ass a Gandalf but he sure wasn't in this movie.
e. Eowin WOULD BECOME MORTAL IF SHE BINDS HER SOUL TO ARAGORN. Dude, did Peter Jackson EVEN READ THIS FUCKING BOOK! How the FUCK did he think Elrond got to be a halfelf? His mother DIED a human. What a fucking JACKASS.
f. Um... what happened to the Hurons?
g. Why id there an HOUR of usless shit in this move and why does it lack about a quarter of the actual text?
h. WHY? WHY? WHY?
i. Gandalf was naked when he fought the Balrog.
j. This is my only complaint from the 1st movie but it fits here too... Glamdring the Foe HAmmer glow when orc are near too. Stings a fucking pig sticker next to Gandalf's sword.
In the end yes, like Titanic, it was a ship full of hubris that smashed into the iceberg of logic and sank.
THIS MOVIE NEEDS A PHANTOM EDIT!
-F34nor
Feanor fairest of those who saw the light of the two trees.