Slashdot Mirror
Rick Berman Doesn't Know Why Nemesis Tanked
Steve Krutzler writes "Star Trek producer Rick Berman broke his silence today on the debacle that was the North American box office for STAR TREK NEMESIS. The film grossed $18.5 million in its opening weekend in mid-December, the lowest of any TREK bow, and its current domestic total stands below even that of the much-lambasted STAR TREK V. Read more at TrekWeb. Berman says he doesn't know why the movie failed and the future of more TREK movies is uncertain."
Obviously its because they cut Wil Wheaton's scenes out of the movie.
They'll eventually figure out the deep, dark secret of the ST:TNG series: Wil Wheaton was the glue that held that show together. He was the driving force that kept us all watching. His creative spirit guided the series, and to leave him out of a project is to incur the Wrath of Khan.
Seriously, Wil, got any comments?
Didn't it open the same weekend as Rob Schneider's The Hot Chick?
My God, what was Paramount thinking of!
Why ST: Nemesis "tanked":
(1) The plot wasn't worthy of the talent arrayed; and,
(2) The plot was nothing more than an episode turned feature length;, and,
(3) It was all hype, no substance; and,
(4) People don't want to see a main character (Data) die in a lame way, give the man some respect, will you?; and,
(5) Retarded androids aren't funny.
A super ship owned by a sect of the Romulan empire?
Picards clone leading them?
RAMMING SPEED???
Bah, I've seen better on sites like this and many other sites like it.
The above post is an editorial, the poster cannot and will not be held responsible for all or in part for it's contents
Nemisis was the greatest movie of the year! What better plot than to have evil mirror images of the Star Trek Crew. This idea is so deep and spiritual, that surely they deserve more credit. And what's more, the survival of Earth was at stake! It sure doesn't get more exciting or original than that I can tell you.
It's good to see Star Trek follow the quality ideas of such exciting shows as Andromeda, and StarHunters.
"I only speak the truth"
Karma: null(Mostly affected by an unassigned variable)
Yeah yeah karma whore and all that, but I couldnt resist :)
10. After slugging down six Shirley Temple's in 10-forward, Wes stumbles to the holodeck, which he commands to "take me to hell." His broken body is later found on the empty holodeck in a pool of vomit.
9. Wesley gets gang-raped by a group of female Klingons.
8. Riker gets carried away executing an order from Picard to "knock the little snot around a bit."
7. Data catches him tossing off. Uncomprehending, he requires a detailed explanation from Wesley, who dies of embarrassment.
6. Extensive lab analysis of a green slime found on one of the control panels uncovers the fact that our favorite ensign has, once again, been picking his nose. He is summarily fired and commits suicide.
5. Wes gets gang-raped by a group of male Klingons.
4. On an earlier episode, Wes got to kiss a girl who turned into a Chewbacca-like creature. Here, she returns, and they once again get involved. (Un)fortunately, once she gets really heated, she mutates back into a wookie and forces Wesley to be her cringing sex slave. She then tears him limb from limb and eats him.
3. In a rare episode involving characters from both ST and ST:TNG, Spock attempts a Vulcan mind-meld with Wesley. Wesley's head explodes. Spock barely survives, spending the next several days scratching himself and whining.
2. Worf notices a Romulan ship on the scanners, and sends Wesley down to clean out the photon tubes. Later, someone makes a comment about the needs of the many having outweighed the needs of the few.
1. Wes gets involved in a deviant sexual practice known as "tribble stuffing," not realizing that tribbles multiply any where. Even an emergency laser enema by Dr. Crusher fails to save him
Anataka suki desu. Itsumo. Itsumademo.
Yes, I agree. Berman fell victim to one of the classic blunders.
The most famous, of course, is never get involved in a bidding war with Dreamworks.
But only SLIGHTLY less well known is this:
Never go in 5 days ahead of LORD OF THE RINGS when the franchise is on the line!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha --
Wesley suggests to `Q' that Q might stand for Queer. The all-powerful being takes offense, turns Wesley into a giant testicle and hits him with a hammer, thus extinguishing him in the most painful way possible.
Magnus.
Clearly, the only way for the Star Trek series to get itself out of this rut (the only way it's EVER gotten itself out of any rut) is to bring back an old character and make him evil! Do I mean evil Khan? Evil Kirk? Evil Spock's brother? Evil Lor? No! I'm talking about Evil Wil!
After years of being abandoned at the academy and getting dumped in trash cans and toilet swirlies, Wil wants nothing more than for Captain Picard to grovel at his feet as he gives him the galaxy's worst wedgie! "Ha ha ha! That's right Picard! Feel my pain! You could have been a father figure to me, but you kicked me off your ship!" In a shocking twist, Wesley's own mother shoots him with a phaser.
"Et tu Mother?"
"You know, I never like that little brat anyway."
The only thing sadder than Nemisis will be the lackluster number of posts on Slashdot about the movie that no one went and saw.
_____________
hard working American who pored their hearts and soles
Ah, the mental picture of Rick Berman alternately poking holes into his chest and shoes......
.....maybe that explains why the movie sucked....
....or maybe is was just yet another trek movie in a series hanging on to the stories of a dead man.
Whatever
Ummm, I don't remember seeing 'Harry Potter and the Two Towers'. Was it good? What courageous stunt did Harry do with those two towers?
Maybe if there's a next movie episode they could slip through a wormhole into an alternate universe where all spaceships don't fly "right side up" in space. Just think of the possibilities in a reality with an extra, third dimension!
"with their freedom lost all virtue lose" - Milton
What would Emperor Norton do?
Emperor Norton would finance his own movie using his own minted cash, playing himself as the star, but in this case, protector of the federation, and emperor of Orion, or some such. And he would very likely make it a better film than Nemesis.
Planet P Blog - Liberty with Technologuy.
www.enthea.org
Well, see, Harry has this ring^H^H^H^H diary that contains the life essence of Saur*cough*, I mean, Voldemort that he (Harry) has to destroy, but first they (the hobbi^H^H er, kids) have to find the entrance to Mord*scribble scribble* the Chamber of Secrets that's in one of the two Towers at Middle School or something...
Whats up with the stupid car thingie on the planet??! That reminded me of the chase in Diamonds are Forever. I mean, a dune buggy with Picard and Worf riding shotgun (Ok, riding Phaser) is NOT what I'd expect from an ST movie, somehow. For one, why the hell did the Enterprise not just beam them up when they were under fire??!!
:)
The problem with Nemesis is that the movie was directed by a action movie director who is not an Startrek fan (Stuart Baird) and he directed it like an action film. SO here goes to Paramount. THIS IS NOT JAMES BLOODY BOND!
In one scene my friend (who is not a St fan and do not know the chars) leaned over to me and said "Picard, Jean luc Picard". That said it all.
That said, the movie was not THAT bad. I really liked Shinzon's "I was lonely" line and of course, Deanna Troi in that skimpy little thing. Hmmmmm. I mean, this ST actually had an MPAA rating for "scene of sexual content". And its not Kirk porking aliens either.
Data singing was a little embarassing. No wonder they killed him off
The dangers of excessive individualism are nothing compared to the oppressiveness of excessive collectivism
Nemesis reinforced just how important it is to remember to backup your Data.
Thank you! Thank you! I'll be here all week, drive safely.
I wasn't in it!
She was actually one of the more interesting characters on the show.
And in my view, the single hottest.
If given a choice between Crusher and Troi, I'd pick Crusher any day.
Crusher: Smart, skilled, attractive, long red hair, when she saved the ship it was with her BRAIN. Real sexual tension with Picard.
Troi: Decent rack but beyond that a source of obvious, any child could tell you that, "Insight." When she saved the ship it was because the writers couldn't think of a better story that week. Lame, cold turkey parody of sexual tension with the Kirk wannabe.
That and we all know which actress has aged better.
"Live Free or Die." Don't like it? Then keep out of the USA
One Fine Day At The Academy
Wes: Bye, Mom!
Bev: Bye, Wes!
(door closes)
Squadronmate Tom Paris: Damn, Wes! Your mom is one hot piece of ass. I would pound the holy hell out of her for hours on end.
Wes: Shut up!
Tom: I'm talkin' about burying a diamond class erection to the hilt inside old Big Red!
Wes: Shut up you ass!
Tom: I mean, what more could you want out of life? Is she a natural redhead, if you know what I mean?
Wes: Shut up now!
Tom: Damn, I'd like to go to sleep with her stink on me. I'm just gonna take this little genetic sample over to the bioclone lab and run a little...experiment.
"Has [being a kidnapped teenage girl, raped repeatedly for months] changed you?" - Katie Couric to Elizabeth Smart