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Gates Provides Windows Crash Statistic

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the fasten-seat-belts dept.

cybercuzco writes "In an otherwise innocuous article at they NYT (FRRYYY) Bill Gates says that according to error reporting software in windows, 5% of all windows installations crash two or more times every day. Gates goes on to state that Microsoft is looking at charging for some of its software updates that it now distributes for free."

16 of 984 comments (clear)

  1. Boy... by momerath2003 · · Score: 5, Funny

    If that's not a conservative estimate, call me a liberal.

    --
    I had but a simple dream, to destroy all humans.
  2. I haven't read the article by agrippa_cash · · Score: 5, Funny

    I haven't read the article, but I assume that the Poster meant to type 95%. Its OK, we all make mistakes.

    1. Re:I haven't read the article by lfourrier · · Score: 4, Funny

      5% of windows installations that report to redmond crashes 2 or more times a day.
      How many of you press cancel when the error report is to be send ?
      If user are not completely stupids(did you already read a report and understood all what to be send to MS), 90% of crashes are not reported. And 5% are so crashed they are not in a state to do any reporting. so we now have 100% of all windows installations.

  3. Re:Cash for updates? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Billy is still taking lessons from the RIAA.

  4. 5% by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    The other 95% of all Windows installations have the reporting feature disabled...

  5. Uhm.... sure. by wo1verin3 · · Score: 5, Funny

    >>Microsoft is looking at charging for some of
    >>its software updates that it now distributes
    >>for free."

    Buffer ovverflow - $15
    Firewall Fix - $45
    Service Pack 3 - $300
    Knowing that no matter how much patches come out, Linux will be more secure - Pricess

  6. Stating the obvious by Frac · · Score: 4, Funny

    Mr. Gates stressed that the company's biggest bet is on the next version of Windows.

    Well duh. The company's biggest bet is always on the next version of Windows!

    If they said "Well, we're betting the entire company's future on the next version of Microsoft Bob", they're screwed. ;-P

  7. Re:Hm. by Walt+Dismal · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's not a crash. It's...it's... a programmed REST BREAK.

  8. Re:WOW. by JavaTHut · · Score: 5, Funny
    5% may sound like a small amount, but considering HOW MANY Windows boxes exist on EARTH, that is a HUGE number...

    ... which is why we use a percentage

  9. The other 95% by eap · · Score: 5, Funny

    are still stuck at the "Windows was not shut down properly" screen.

  10. Re:skewed statistics. by The+Masked+Fruitcake · · Score: 5, Funny

    You're absolutely right. I've found that by not installing or running any software, I can dramatically improve the performance and stability of Windows.

    --
    Sola Scriptura * Sola Gratia * Sola Fide * Solus Christus * Soli Deo Gloria
  11. *sigh* by tnak · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Knowing that no matter how much patches come out, Linux will be more secure - Pricess"

    Price[le]ss

    And that sums up the problem with Linux at this stage of the game: no matter what you want it to do, there seems to be one little piece that isn't there yet.

  12. Re:skewed statistics. by lurgyman · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...and Windows barely crashes at all when I select "linux-2.6.0-test1" at the boot prompt :)

  13. Could be an advertisement for MSFT scalability by mdubinko · · Score: 5, Funny

    Think about it. 100 million Windows users. 5% is 5 mil. At 2 crashes a day, that's 10 million transactions. Daily. Not even counting all the less frequent crashers.

    That's 416,666 transactions per hour, 6944 transactions per minute, or about 116 transactions per second.

    If each report is 50K (don't have an exact figure, and I don't want to wait the .5 day to measure it), the throughput is 500 gigabytes per day, averaging 46.4 Megabits/second.

    *That's* the kind of data processing system I'd like to buy!
    -m

    --
    --- Learn XForms today: http://xformsinstitute.com
  14. Bill, you are thinking too small. by rice_burners_suck · · Score: 4, Funny
    Bill is thinking small. Why charge for upgrades? It is so difficult to convince people that they need updates when they're free. What makes Microsoft think that people will pay for something they won't bother to take for free?

    What Bill needs to do is think fourth dimensionally. Updates continue to be free. Hell, Windows itself and all other Microsoft software should be completely free of charge as well. Microsoft will instead bring in ten times more profit by...

    Charging for each software malfunction!

    Microsoft will include special code in its kernels that will be backed up by a legally required instruction in the processor, along with a strong encryption path on the physical electronics that protect this particular instruction. This innovative technology will automatically detect software malfunctions and send a strongly encrypted packet to Microsoft. At that point, Microsoft will automatically bill the luser some set fee, like $20.00 for each occurance of a bug that causes an application to crash, $40.00 for a Windows BSOD, $60.00 for a complete crash requiring a cold boot, and, say, $100.00 for a crash that causes loss of data, including hard disk crashes unrelated to software.

    This innovative technology would create tremendous value for Microsoft stockholders and employees of the company. Stockholders would make enormous profits on the millions upon millions of crashes that occur each day, compounded by the fact that Microsoft's software would inevitably get installed on more computers, being free of charge. Microsoft employees would not have to test or debug software as it is no longer a problem if the software malfunctions. This would shorten cycles, increase revenue and fulfill the enterprise integration strategy.

    In short, Bill, stop thinking like a hungry beggar on the street trying to get a few more pennies for a beer and start thinking like a CEO of some powerful company.

  15. Re:Cash for updates? by cgenman · · Score: 4, Funny

    You too can own your own copy of Windows XP SP2! Just 99.95 (per year) gets you a full suite of new abilities such as an enhanced notepad with integrated spellcheck feature, an easier control panel system with automatic user-input correction, an integrated desktop launch bar, and automatic digital video camera detection for your digital lifestyle. A revamped Internet Explorer now features "Tabbed Browsing," a revolutionary first in Internet Experiences brought to you by the innovators at Microsoft. And you get security patches that prevent the Skynet virus from becoming self-aware and launching nuclear weapons against humanity's densely populated cities. And themes! SP2 contains over 20 new windows themes for you to choose from. With such desktops as "Daisy Sunshine," "Piano Blues," and "Where do you want to go today?" you are sure to find a style that fits any taste.

    Remember, when you don't upgrade your software, you support the destruction of all mankind at the hands of The Machines.

    Brought to you by Microsoft.

    Microsoft: There is no Fate.

    --
    The ______ Agenda