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SCO Execs Dumping Stock
luigi6699 writes "According to the Salt Lake Tribune, 'SCO Group executives have sold about 119,000 shares of their company since it filed a lawsuit against IBM in March...' Their CFO started the $1.2 million sell-off just after the lawsuit."
And in other news...
SCO Group to Shoot Babies
By Jeff Heard
Lindon, UT - The SCO Group announced the launch of a campaign to shoot 1% of all babies born in the US.
"Statistically, 1% of all people are Linux users. Rather than have these young hoodlums grow up without any respect for our intellectual property, we have chosen to nip it in the bud, as it were," said SCO's CEO, Darl McBride.
In addition, during the campaign announcement, SCO said that individuals could pay $2,499 per child for immunity from execution. "The price goes up to $5,200 dollars after that family's firstborn reaches 18 months, so it is in their advantage to pony up now," McBride continued.
The announcement brought cheers from SCO's chief investors and supporters, including the Gartner Group, and the BSA (Blind and Shortsighted Alliance). The organizations hailed it as "A brave, innovative step in the fight against intellectual piracy."
An RIAA spokesperson that was also present said that they were taking serious looks at SCO's proposal for fighting piracy in the music industry. "I think this will be a great deterrent. It will force parents to talk to their kids about the evils of intellectual piracy. In a free economy, this kind of thing is a must."
SCO, which stands for "Satanic Cultists' Operation," changed its name from Caldera in 2002, when it was acquired by an obscure organization which exclusively employs 1200-year-old undead trial lawyers. They are now embroiled in an ongoing legal battle with IBM, Red Hat, and the Open Source community over alleged copyright infringements embedded inside Linux.
Speculation has been abound about what will happen if SCO wins the lawsuit. Some have suggested that Linux will disappear entirely from the market. Others have speculated that if SCO loses the lawsuit, it will use its connections with the Underworld to assemble a massive Army of the Dead, march on IBM headquarters, and crush it into a smoldering oblivion. When asked about the possibility of an undead Armageddon scenario, a senior IBM spokesperson said, speaking in stereophonic bass-tones, "This will not happen."
When booed during the announcement by a large rotten tomato-wielding crowd, McBride exhorted, "I am disappointed with your reaction to our announcement. I must say that your decision to throw tomatoes does not seem conducive to the long-term survivability of your firstborn children."
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
-Xenocrates
it's a new, but not suprising meaning to "take a wicked dump."
I took a dump yesterday too!
And the contents of my toilet had many similarities to SCO stock!
This is a benevolent decision, folks. They want to share the wealth with the rest of the world who buys those shares when their stock price skyrockets. You know, after they prove their claims.
What? It could happen!
I want to see all their new shareholders (due to them thinking the lawsuit was real and buying more) shit themselves when the price plummets :-)
Slashdot - The one stop shop for procrastination
they found out that the monopoly money we were all sending to them is not worth anything :)
Well, this should go down as one of the most obivous scams that has happened on wall street since enron and martha..
*sigh*
anime+manga together at last.. in real time.
"Like rats from a sinking ship, these are the days of our lives
-kgj
With the selloff starting 4 days after the lawsuit was filed and SCO VP Michael Wilson selling his entire stake in the company? I'd say a few SCO execs are likely to get a call from our friends at the SEC, and they ain't gonna be talking about whether or not Tennessee's going to a bowl game this year.
From the R'ing The FA department:
David Boies' law firm, Boies, Schiller & Flexner, represents SCO. Boies represented former Vice President Al Gore in the 2000 election recount and tried the U.S. antitrust case against Microsoft.
Wow. Now if that isn't a stellar assortment of huge wins! I'm sure President Gore, who was so helpful in pursuing the now-completed Microsoft breakup, will be happy that his old friend is ensuring that SCO gets what they deserve for their valuable contributions to Linux.
(Although, ironically, SCO may indeed get just what they deserve...)
Stressed? Me? Of course not. Stress is what a rubber band feels before it breaks, silly.
And all this time I was under the impression that the execs thought they were the Czars of Soviet Russia. I guess I was mistaken.
5) profit!
Sounds like they may be joining Martha Stewart in jail soon ;^))
Science is the Real TRUTH!
No worries. I'm the father of 8 month old twin boys and _I_ found it funny.
(The eldest, by two minutes, is disassembling his toys, God Love Him! -sniff!-)
"Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus."
Dear Slashdot Poster, Earlier today it was brought to our attention that an article posted to the Slashdot.com website mentioned that SCO executives were selling off their interests in the company. This letter is to inform you that the terms "SCO" and "SCO Stock" used in conjunction are owned exclusively by SCO and any unauthorized use without proper licensing is a violation of our intellectual property. In a good-faith effort to allow the general public to bring their posts about the SCO Company into licensing compliance, we are offering you the limited opportunity to properly license the terms "SCO" and "SCO Stock" for only $15,000 USD. This fee will not only allow you to use the terms "SCO" and "SCO Stock" but also the more valuable term "SCO Executives" without the need to pay any further licensing fees. It will be in effect until August 15th 2003 after which the fee will increase to $35,000 USD and WILL NOT include the right to use the term "SCO Executives" in your posts. Please contact SCO if you have any additional questions or to purchase a license. We appreciate your compliance with our demands and hope to have a long business relationship with you in the future. Sincerely, SCO(tm) Check out the great Linux PC I'm selling!
Anthony Papillion
Advanced Data Concepts, Inc.
"Quality Custom Software and IT Services"
- David Boies' law firm, Boies, Schiller & Flexner, represents SCO. Boies represented former Vice President Al Gore in the 2000 election recount and tried the U.S. antitrust case against Microsoft.
Wow... Sounds like just the winning lawyer I'd want on my side in a battle against a multi-billion dollar company.[eco2geek@Jean-Luc]$man sco
SCO(6)NAME
sco - FUD (Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt) spreader and SCO Group satirizerSYNOPSIS
sco OPTIONDESCRIPTION
SCO Group alleges that IBM misappropriated SCO's intellectual property and put it into Linux. SCO sued IBM for more than $3 billion (up from an original claim of $1 billion) in damages, and sent 1,500 letters to businesses warning them of possible liability for using Linux. Many critics think SCO's tactics are simply a way for a dying company to salvage whatever profitability it can. The most jaded critics allege that SCO's actions are a way for the company management to sell off stock at artificially inflated prices before the company folds (a.k.a. a "pump and dump" scheme).-q, --quote
Displays a quote associated with the case. Quotes come from industry analysts, IBM and SCO Group officials, and leaders in the Linux community.-dp, --display-proof
Displays the Linux kernel code that SCO alleges belongs to it (the result is a blank page, since SCO refuses to release its "evidence" publicly). Press "q" to return).-skl, --sco-kernel-license
Displays the license agreement of the Linux kernel that SCO is distributing with its OpenLinux distribution, on its publicly-accessible ftp site. (Surprise: It's the GPL.)-l, --legalize
Asks if you wish to delete the entire contents of-lb, --legalize-boot
Asks if you wish to delete the entire contents of-v, --version
Prints the version and copyright information, then exits.AUTHORS
Sosume Donchuwana and Greedo UnBridledDISCLAIMER
SCO, the SCO Group, and OpenLinux are trademarks or registered trademarks of Caldera International, Inc. and used here for satirical purposes only.SEE ALSO
http://slashdot.org/search.pl?topic=88sco 1.0 - August 2003 - SCO(6)
This guy caught it when it was on Google's Top News page.
This is funny, but it shows that we need to take things like Google with a grain of salt. There's no human in the loop, and sometimes it shows.
See what I've been reading.
No worries. I'm the father of 8 month old twin boys and _I_ found it funny.
Its always funny until someone has to pay a dual royalty for having two children. At $2499 each, that means you own SCO 5 grand, and that price will double in less than a year when they hit 18 months! Still laughing?
The article didn't mention if you received a license for one cpu along with the immunity from the standard baby killing. I couldn't find out on the SCO website either...
Tequila: It's not just for breakfast anymore!
I just found this really hilarious quote on one of SCO's early press releases (http://ir.sco.com/ReleaseDetail.cfm?ReleaseID=41
"Caldera and 'Unifying UNIX with Linux for Business' are trademarks or registered trademarks of Caldera Systems Inc."
Not only were they putting Unix code into Linux, but they fucking TRADEMARKED it!!!
Does anyone have any Ace Bandages? I need to wrap something around my torso before I bust my gut laughing.