The Death of A Universe

ninthwave writes "The Guardian is running an article on research into the visible effects of entropy in the Universe. Alan Heavens of The University of Edinburgh did the research also posted at The Royal Astronomical Society with this article" I dunno - expansion, heat death - it all reminds me of a teacher who said "I'm not a premillenialist, postmillenialist - I'm a pan-millenialist, as in it's all going to pan out in the end." Update: 08/18 16:36 GMT by S : Headline fixed.

Comments

Am grammar died

[rebeka thomas]

And some slashdot them headline am grammar did die hot death ugh.

Re:Am grammar died

[Bingo Foo]

You're both wrong. It's myniverse.

Now I'm worried

[Mad-cat]

So, if I'm alive in 5 billion years, I'll die in a fiery red version of our sun.

Re:Now I'm worried

[Demodian]

Damn, now I guess I have to get something useful done at work today... pooh!

Re:Now I'm worried

[phthisic]

Hahaha. That's funny. It's an old saw. I think Sagan mentioned it in one of his books. An astronomer is giving a lecture and he says the universe will end in 5 billion years. A guy stands up in sort of a panic and says, "How many years?" The astronomer repeats himself. The guy sits down, saying, "Oh, thank God. I thought you said 5 million."

Just an aside, in one of his books, Sagan tells a story about how he was working at an observatory late one New Years Eve. A guy calls up and Sagan can hear the sounds of a party in the background. The guy, obviously drunk, says, "Let me talk to an ashtromener."

Sagan says, "This is Carl Sagan. I'm an astronomer."

The guy says, "Whatsh zat fuzzy thing up in the shky?"

Sagan knows there's a comet visible so he tells the guy it's a coment.

"Whatsha comet?" the guy asks.

"Well," replies Sagan. "It's sort of like a dirty snowball."

After a short pause the caller says, "I wanna shpeak to a real Shtromoner."

U of E

[GMontag]

Doesn't this guy also go on to invent transparent aluminum then come back to the present and give away the formula to a fabricator in San Francisco?

"Computer! Oh computer?"

W has decided:

[burgburgburg]

Entropy is the cause of the East Coast Blackout. Or as he put it, "enteropie".

Oh, and Karl Rove has declared that entropy was created during the Clinton administration and a partisan Congress has prevented W from eliminating it.

vapor

[Gorny]

Does that mean we'll never get to see Duke Nukem Forver?

Job description

[SnappingTurtle]

Just the other day I was told I couldn't put "minimize entropy" as my job description where I work. Now look what's happening. I'm going to take this article to my boss and say "I told you so!"

I for one

[QEDog]

I for one welcome our old entropy overlord!

Re:"An Universe"?

[Razor Blades are Not]

I oonilaterally disagree with your oonique position. Ur ooninformed.

I think MC Steven Hawking Says it best...

[DanThe1Man]

You down with Entropy? Yeah, you know me! (mp3 link)

Re:I think MC Steven Hawking Says it best...

[syle]

Wow, linking to a 3 meg MP3 in a +5 comment. You've got balls.

Let me guess, it's not your server?

Re:"An Universe"?

[Goody]

You must be new here...

aaaahhh, forget it..

I, for one, welcome our grammar-challenged Slashdot Editor overlords.

Re:"An Universe"? (with apologies to Monty Python)

[TimTheFoolMan]

Announcer: "Today, in our studios, we have an Elk, I mean, an expert..."

Anne Elk: "Not Anne Expert, Anne Elk!"

Announcer: "Yes. Sorry. Today we have a-n expert, not a-n-n-e Expert on... the Universe..."

Anne Elk: "That's right Chris, I am."

Announcer: "An Expert?"

Anne Elk: "No... Anne Elk"

Tim

um, sure...

[cybermage]

it all reminds me of a teacher who said "I'm not a premillenialist, postmillenialist - I'm a pan-millenialist, as in it's all going to pan out in the end."

This guy must have been fun at parties.

'The lamps are going out all over the universe.'

[*weasel]

... i thought the blackout was confined to new york, detroit and cleveland?

Re:My take on this

[WTFmonkey]

Hey, you found my acid! Give it back!

Re:What a joke!

[zdislaw]

Humans should learn to shut up and simply observe and not make grandiose statements about how things are as they are in no position to do so.

Who then, if not humans, would you suggest make grandiose statements?

Re:"An Universe"?

[TheShadow]

"But language is an evolving invention of the people and not a set of rules defended by an elite crackerjack force of grammar gnomes."

Tell that to the French.

*rimshot*

Sad news, Universe dead at ~14 Gyr

[Guano_Jim]

...just read some sad news in the Guardian - the Universe was found dead in its multidimensional home this morning. There weren't any more details yet. I'm sure we'll all miss it, even if you weren't a fan of its work there's no denying its contribution to popular culture. Truly a cosmological icon.

Hemos went to School!

[DarlMcBribe]

I dunno - expansion, heat death - it all reminds me of a teacher who said "I'm not a premillenialist, postmillenialist - I'm a pan-millenialist, as in it's all going to pan out in the end."

Hemos, this does prove that you have been to a school and even listened to what the teacher was saying!!

Re:Interesting, but I don't put much faith into it

[jdgreen7]

I'm sure this document is very enlightening to those with the property background knowledge, but any paper with the phrase "according to conventional four-dimenional quantum field theory" (page 3) is a bit beyond my comprehension, and I'm not sure if it can be called easily digestable...

The Death of An Career

[doc_traig]

Hemos,

You have embarrassed we for the last time. Get an box and clean out you locker.

Loves,

Taco

Re:Earth not to be engulfed!

[saforrest]

The first of your links seemed to suggest that this conclusion depended on not taking the tidal effects of the moon into account, i.e. that with the tidal effects considered, Earth was more likely to be engulfed.

I was amused by this line (from the second link): "Perhaps this 200 million year reprieve will give humans enough time to form their own survival capsules and escape into deep space."

I think that if we really haven't invented "survival capsules" 5.5 billion years from now, that another 200 million aren't going to matter much. :) (By that time we'll probably be dead or Vorlons, anyway.)

Obligatory Rimshot

[GMFTatsujin]

...who won the Nobel prize in 1974 for his work in discovering quasars at Cambridge University...

You'd think someone would have noticed before then. They were behind the couch the whole time.

Ba-BOOM! Thanks, I'm here all evening.