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SCO Claims $15,300,000 From SCOsource
Hollins writes "Yesterday, SCO filed their latest 10-Q. In it, they claim over fifteen million dollars in revenue from their SCOsource initiative (mostly from Microsoft and Sun) with a decline in revenue from all other sources. A lot of interesting statements are in the 10-Q, including "The success of our SCOsource licensing initiative, at least initially, will depend to a great extent on the perceived strength of our intellectual property and contractual claims and our willingness to enforce our rights. Many, particularly those in the open source community, dispute the allegations of infringement that we have made"."
Just reminding everyone that even though Jews are smarter than the rest of us, they aren't enslaving us in the cotton fields or anything. Nor are they shoving us into the ovens. It is a good thing the superior race is so kind.
Version 1.0 / M
America, eh folks? It's a pretty screwed up place. Unfortunately, but not indefinitely, the USA's weapons of mass destruction make it the most powerful country in the world (militarily). As a result, it helps to be aware of American society and fit into it, and our quick 8-step guide should have you on the path to burger-munching enlightenment.
1 - Buy yourself a gun
To become a fully-fledged Yank, you'll need to get a weapon. Americans think that having more killing machines magically makes their country safer, and it helps them to walk around saying "I'll put a cap in your ass". Even though the concept of "no guns = no gun-related crimes" is alien to the average Yank, it'll give you a false sense of security in this country with the highest crime rates in the developed world.
2 - Put on at least 25 stone
Skinny? Medium? Chubby? That won't cut it in the good ol' US of A. Because America has the highest obesty levels on the planet, you'll need to get those rolls of flab built up. Eating 18 waffles with Maple syrup for breakfast (and visiting Burger King five times in a day) is all natural when much of the world is suffering massive poverty. Get fat and fit in.
3 - Learn the lingo
We've talked about issues affecting society, but on a personal level you'll need more knowledge (or ignorance as it may be) to fit in. First, forget proper English. Confuse "your" with "you're". Say "must of" instead of "must have". Whenever anything interesting occurs, say "shucks" repeatedly. Instead of clever spontaneity or witty insults, call people "asswipes". It's funny!
4 - Throw away all maps, history books etc.
To really feel a part of American society, you must lose all knowledge of the world. Forget where Poland is. Scrap your knowledge of the lengthy Chinese history. Make cretinous remarks like "India? Is that in Africa?". Because ALL that matters is America, and it doesn't matter how pathetic you look to educated people the world over.
5 - Become totally irrational and nonsensical
Spout on about the Constitution, and then make drastic changes to it. Talk about "freedom of speech" and watch TV programmes about the Ku Klux Klan. Rant on about market freedom, and sit back as companies run riot and destroy the economy with their anti-competitive practices. Essentially, act idiotic at all times.
6 - Sue everyone you ever meet
The USA doesn't produce many decent quality products, so the society is crumbling into a litigation-happy joke. With so many jobs going overseas to talented workers, your only option left is to start legal proceedings. About anything. Someone step on your toe? Get some hotshot downtown lawyer to sue their ass!
7 - Get a "shrink"
Americans have a hard time dealing with their own problems in a mature manner, and prefer to spend hundreds of dollars sitting in front of someone and whinging. However trivial your problems may be, blast them out like a baby!
8 - Watch abysmal TV
Forget educational programmes and incisive documentaries. Your ideal night in is with your gun, six cheeseburgers and a Friends box set. Watch as some over-paid talentless "actor" enters the scene, and whoop and scream hysterically as he delivers some ridiculously poor wisecrack.
So there you have it! Those 8 steps should have you killing innocent people, piling on pounds and acting like a moron in no time. America awaits you, brave hero! Just get out before it collapses in disarray.
END
SLASHDOT
JEWISH
ANAL
ASSOCIATION
We would like to join forces with the GNAA to have an interracial orgy next month.
Contact:
Rabbi Likeslilsalami
do not work at Publix Supermarkets.
Thanks for sharing, absolutely fantastic, HIHI.
http://www.petitiononline.com/icanndns/petition.ht ml
.com and .net domains; and
.com and .net, and should instead follow the IETF standards;
.com and .net zones to registries that are more willing to follow the DNS standards;
: //www.opensrs.org/archives/discuss-list/0309/ date.html0 9/16/003421 0e gis trars/v es/ga/w .icann.org/correspondence/lynn-message-t o-iab-06jan03.htmd ence/iab-message-to -lynn-25jan03.html ists/archives/ga/ms g00336.html
Stop Verisign DNS Abuse
View Current Signatures - Sign the Petition
To: ICANN
We internet users, who either own domain names or have an interest in the domain name system, wish to object to the Verisign Sitefinder system. We believe that the system:
1. breaks technical standards, by rewriting the expected error codes to instead point to Verisign's pay-per-click web directory, and threatens the security and stability of the Internet;
2. breaks technical standards affecting email services, and other internet systems;
3. is anti-competitive, providing Verisign with 20 million eyeballs per day for "free", while not paying for the domains they are resolving. All other market participants pay at least $6 per domain per year (wholesale);
4. violates trademark rights of domain holders, by typosquatting on their
5. violates the authoritative nature of DNS, turning it instead into a "best guess" system filled with uncertainty, thereby destroying the coherence of the DNS for Verisign's own short-term profit.
We hereby demand that ICANN immediately:
a) insist that Verisign cease giving incorrect answers to any query in
b) if Verisign refuses, should redelegate the
c) for greater certainty for all gTLD registries, pass a resolution stating that "gTLD Registry operateors WILL return NXDOMAIN for ALL DNS queries for which there is not a REGISTERED domain name"; and
d) that Verisign be reprimanded for their monopolistic abuse of the DNS system, and return all audited gross revenues from their Sitefinder system to stakeholders, via a payment to the Generic Names Supporting Organization (GNSO) of ICANN in the name of the Non-Commercial constituency
[Supporting documentation can be found at the sites below]
http://www.merit.edu/mail.archives/nanog/
http
http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=03/
http://gnso.icann.org/mailing-lists/archives/r
http://gnso.icann.org/mailing-lists/archi
http://log.does-not-exist.org/
http://ww
http://www.icann.org/correspon
http://gnso.icann.org/mailing-
Sincerely,
The Undersigned
your new sig is a thing of beauty.
Humdinger!
Standing at the very edge of my imagination, I peered into the inky void and realised -- I couldn't think up a new sig.
Who put a Bengal Tiger in the Kaiser's latrine?
It's the Sneak, isn't it?
Yes, it's definitely the sneak.
He's dastardly,
he loves catastrophe,
his schemes are masterly,
takes tea at half-past-three...