Mafia Tech Support

Mzilikazi writes "A story from Wired about performing tech support for the mob, mainly focusing on gambling. Some interesting information is presented about P2P applications. Frankly it sounds like fiction to me (you can already imagine the movie being made -- 'I Was a Hacker for The Mob'), but the story is interesting nonetheless and shows that if you're skilled and determined but have a flexible moral compass, there's a lot of job opportunities out there." I started reading it for the mob references, but kept on reading for the details of how to run an illegal gambling organization.

Comments

Average geek

[chill]

You'd figure the average geek would make one too many Simpson's reference about "Fat Tony" and get his ass whacked before he could do anything useful.

But do they have jackets?

[Llywelyn]

But do they walk around in jackets with MAFIA written on their back in neon-green electropigment?

"Mafia, you've got a friend in the family."

Other possible mob ventures

[Alien54]

Well. They may be useful in dealing with spam, as seen in this classic item posted on now [sadly] defunct Segfault back in april 99:

Mafia Don Announces New Anti-Spam Venture

As the NSA and FBI fear, traditional crime organizations have been incorporating high-tech communication into their organizations. Although Janet Reno was quoted stating "This is law enforcement's worst nightmare.", techies around the world are sure to be pleased with one New York Syndicate's new venture.

It all started when Don Dominiqi signed onto his AOL account last Monday morning. His inbox was filled with "Make Money Fast", "Viagra On-Line", and "Teenybopper Web Sex" ads. Lost amidst the drivel was an important note detailing a non-taxed shipment of Marlboros, which were later confiscated by the BATF. Little did he know, as he shouted "Bring me the left hand of this f*cking gutterslime!" what would become of it all.

Later that same day, Billy "Run!" Brutekowski and Larry "My Eyes!" Plucker cornered the pasty-faced offender of the Family in a small cyber cafe in Greenwich Village. "This was by far the creepiest place the Boss has ever sent us." stated Billy, who only spoke on condition of anonymity. "Everyone in this place looked pale and sickly, like they had already been 'spoken to'. We asked for this punk, and several people quickly pointed him out. Most of the scum we find in gin joints aren't so quick to finger one of their own," Billy continued.

"He must not watch much TV, because this sh*t didn't even flinch when we came to the corner he was hiding in," Larry proceeded to relate. "We dropped this sheet of paper the Boss had given us on his table and he says 'So you guys want to make money fast, eh?' He puts out his and says to give him $20. This scrawny little dirtball tells me to give him $20!" Larry was quite agitated at this part in his story, and his description of how Sammy Spammer's hand fell off was quite garbled.

Billy continued, "Up till now, this was a routine visit. We was just being playful. The weird sh*t began when we tried to leave." "This pimply faced kid blocks the door as we try to leave, and I'm thinking to myself 'Great, a f*cking Karate Kid hero. He just stand there, and then he hands me a $5 bill." Billy pulls out the $5, and holds it like it is his first quarter from his favorite grandmother. "They lined up after that, and we had $175 in 'tips' when we left the joint."

Later that day the Don himself visited the caf, unwilling to believe the story. Although the details are unclear, sources at the caf indicate that the Don has hired them to build and host a new Anti-Spam site. Through a SSL transaction system, the site will accept spam complaints and credit card donations towards 'solutions to problems'. Multiple complaints against the same spammer are added to the total until an acceptable solution has been found.

Larry tells us that a typical $250 solution is a broken hand, and for $2000 all anyone ever sees again of 'the problem' are his shoes.

The URL is to be announced next week, and the cyber caf's phones have been jammed with requests for more information.

Reminds me of a fortune cookie

[dido]

From one of the BSD Games fortune cookies:

A gangster assembled an engineer, a chemist, and a physicist. He explained that he was entering a horse in a race the following week and the three assembled guys had the job of assuring that the gangster's horse would win. They were to reconvene the day before the race to tell the gangster how they each propose to ensure a win. When they reconvened the gangster started with the engineer:

Gangster: OK, Mr. engineer, what have you got?

Engineer: Well, I've invented a way to weave metallic threads into the saddle blanket so that they will act as the plates of a battery and provide electrical shock to the horse.

G: That's very good! But let's hear from the chemist.

Chemist: I've synthesized a powerful stimulant that dissolves into simple blood sugars after ten minutes and therefore cannot be detected in post-race tests.

G: Excellent, excellent! But I want to hear from the physicist before I decide what to do. Physicist?

Physicist: Well, first consider a spherical horse in simple harmonic motion...

I wonder what a computer scientist would be up to? ;)

Re:Reminds me of a fortune cookie

[julesh]

I always preferred this one:

An engineer, a physicist and a mathematician all live in a shared house. One night, a fire breaks out in each of their rooms. [Don't ask me how!]

The engineer wakes up and realises that there is a fire in his room. He grabs a fire extinguisher and puts it out, then goes back to bed.

The physicist wakes up and also reralises that there is a fire in his room. He grabs a notepad, works out the best way of approaching the fire, and with that knowledge picks up his fire exinguisher and puts it out. Then he goes back to bed.

The mathematician wakes up, and he too notices the fire in his room. He grabs a notepad, and works out how to put the fire out. Then, satisfied that there is a solution, he goes back to bed. :-)

Look on the bright side

[WIAKywbfatw]

It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase googlewhack.