Slashdot Mirror
Sun Negotiating With Wal-Mart Over Java Desktop
An anonymous reader writes "According to an EWeek article, Sun is challenging Microsoft on a new front: the consumer market. Believing its Java Desktop System is "a more effective home and retail solution," the company is negotiating with major retailers Wal-Mart and Office Depot to include the Java desktop on consumer PCs and laptops."
gay
When I was a kid I used to wet my bed. My parents were nice people and didn't really punish me or even let me know that this would be unacceptable at some point. So I just kept on doing it.
Well, one night when I was about 6 I woke up and I had to poop. Having never been scolded for pissing in my bed, I just stayed right there and shit all over my pajamas and my sheets and went right back to sleep.
The next morning my mother was doing the laundry. I still can remember the expression on her face as she held up my bedsheet covered in streaks of 8-hour old shit... Well, let me tell you, that day I learned that it's not accaptable to piss OR shit in bed.
Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda stepped off the bus and was led into the yard of the Michigan State Correctional
Institute. He had been given ten years for participating in a stock fraud. Five with good behavior. Years
spent basking in the glow of a CRT had been hard on him. His body was frail, his skin pallid. He knew he
could never make it through ten years in the general population with his virginity intact. He had to get
into solitary.
As soon as the burly guard unshackled him he made his move. Exhaling a feminine "hmmph" he weakly slapped
the guard. He was quickly taken to the ground, receiving a swift kick to the ribs before being
restrained. As he was dragged to the solitary confinement cell he felt nothing but relief. "At least in
solitary," he thought "I'll be safe." Unfortunately for CmdrTaco he had picked the wrong guard to mess
with.
The next few days were uneventful. The time in his cell he spent evenly between sleeping, reading a "Perl
for Dummies" book he had gotten from the book cart, and masturbating furiously. His self-flagellation was
interrupted on the fourth day. The burly guard he had attacked earlier stepped into his cell. The gleam
in the guards eye and the mean grin on his face made CmdrTaco's pecker quickly shrivel in his hand. "You
fucked with the wrong man when you fucked with Michael Simms," said the guard. "The inmates here call me
The Asshole for a reason. Now come with me, punk."
The guard led him down the hall to one of several empty shower stalls. He roughly threw CmdrTaco in the
stall and locked the door. CmdrTaco was petrified. His mind raced as he imagined the myriad of different
tortures that could be in store for him. His worst fears were confirmed when the guard returned. In his
hands were a short black dress, black stilleto heels, and a curly blonde wig. "Strip down and put this
on, bitch." CmdrTaco did as instructed and was pleased to notice that the dress fit well and the heels
gave him a nice slimming effect. The burly guard admired the drag queen. "The GNAA is gonna love you!"
The guard left the shower stall, only to return minutes later. He opened the door and led 20 large black
men into the stall. "CmdrTaco, meet the Gay Nigger Association of America. GNAA, meet CmdrTaco. I'm sure
you all will get along fine." With that the guard slammed the shower door closed and walked away
laughing.
The men approached CmdrTaco, backing him into a corner. The apparent leader stepped forward. "No matter
what I'm gonna fuck that purdy lil' ass of yours. Now I can fuck it dry or you can lube it up for me."
CmdrTaco knew he had no choice. He kneeled in front of the leader, who began to slap his face with his 10
black inches. Puss from syphilictic sores quickly covered CmdrTaco's cheeks. When the leader was
sufficiently aroused he placed his throbbing cock up to CmdrTaco's lips. As soon as CmdrTaco opened his
mouth the leader violently shoved his manhood to the back of CmdrTaco's throat and exclaimed "Swallow my
shit you cracker bitch!" CmdrTaco gagged as he was violently face fucked.
Just when he was about to pass out the leader pulled out, turned him around and shoved his cock into
CmdrTaco's ass. CmdrTaco began to scream in agony but his cries were quickly muffled by one of the other
gang member's cocks. They rode him like that for the better part of an hour. When one man finished
another quickly took his place. Just as CmdrTaco was getting used to the throbbing pain in his anus the
men stopped. One man lay down on the floor and CmdrTaco was told to get on top of him and take his dick
inside him. Exhausted and humiliated, CmdrTaco had no will left to fight. As soon as he inserted the
penis another man came up behind him and began to force his cock into CmdrTaco's already filled anus.
Again his screams of agony were muffled, this time by a smelly black anus.
For another hour he was violated in this way. When the men were finished with him he co
"Sun is challenging Microsoft on a new front: the consumer market."
!
AAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAAHAHAAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAAA!
Mercy. That's the funniest thing I've read since the "Linux topples Microsoft" option on the poll. Hell, I'd use BeOS before I installed a Java desktop on my computer.
They are used to buying crap.
I am so sick of KDE and GNOME. KDE is an unbearable, inelegant mess, and GNOME just seems to have been stuck immoble in mud for forever. KDE just gets more and more like windows over time, without ever seeming to take on Windows' two or three good features; GNOME has the worst case of Mozilla-itis I've ever seen outside of Mozilla itself (It doesn't matter HOW fast your machine is. Somehow, every single mouseclick, every motion feels sluggish, like some slight delay kicks in after every attempted action. It makes OS X look like BeOS.)
I want so badly for someone to take the Wonder Twins down.
Now, I can only hope Sun understands concepts like "the users expect and demand things like a GUI monitor resolution switcher should be IN THE OS and easy to find, and no consumer OS should ever make the user be aware something called 'XF86config' exists.."
Is the source at all available for Java Desktop? Is it at all customizable by directly talking to the java objects that comprise it?
You actually want to be referred to as "upper-class yuppy?" Let me guess, you and your spouse met at Starbucks. Not the same Starbucks. Different Starbucks, across the street from each other.
You stupid hotel manager!
How are you going to keep them down on the farm once they've seen Karl Hungus?
And you thought Windows was slow...
Sam "The Idiot" Bhavnani says ""in terms of how well it can do, I believe 100 percent that a Windows-powered device would do far better than a Java-powered device." (eWeek you missed the closing quotes). Where did they come up with this guy? He needs to be hit, no beaten severly, with the clue stick. And to that "anonymous" guy who says java crashes the system, this really has not a lot to do with java, but more to do with how you earn your money. If in this day and age your system is crashing you only have yourself to blame. Heck, I can even keep this POS WinNT workstation from crashing and I run Sun java on it.
I really hate IT people who don't bother to think.
...and settle for less, as it runs hardly any software, and end up spending even more $$$ on the Mac due to the hardware that comes standard on the "e" that is missing on the Mac.
You'll be doing OK as long as you don't bother to turn the Mac on.
You're not a wildly stupid person, at least they're funny in a pathetic way. You're not a marginally stupid person, at least you can reply to them with some helpful advice to gently clue them in. You're just a middling dimwit.