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Apple Users Threaten to Sue Over iBook, iPod
An anonymous reader writes "Reuters is running a story about failing Apple hardware. 'Can a few bad apples -- like product quality complaints and potential lawsuits -- spoil the bunch for loyal fans of Apple Computer Inc. ahead of their biggest party of the year? As enthusiasts devoted to Apple prepare to descend on San Francisco next week for the annual Macworld conference, at least two online petitions have collected hundreds of signatures from potential plaintiffs seeking to file lawsuits over claims of defects in the iBook laptop.'" Yay, online petitions, the most effective way to effect change in the world.
I am a homosexual. I bought an Apple computer because of its well earned reputation for being "the" gay computer. Since I have become an Apple owner, I have been exposed to a whole new world of gay friends. It is really a pleasure to meet and compute with other homos such as myself. I plan on using my new Apple computer as a way to entice and recruit young schoolboys into the homosexual lifestyle; it would be so helpful if you could produce more software which would appeal to young boys. Thanks in advance.
with much gayness,
Father Randy "Pudge" O'Day, S.J.
Thanks for your letter. Being Catholic myself, I know exactly what you're talking about! It has always been our plan here at Apple Computer Inc to revolutionize personal computing with our high-quality and highly gay products.
I'm happy to answer your letter by letting you know that YES we will be releasing an entire hLife ("homo-life") software line. You'll be able to recognize it in stores by the small stylized logo depicting a large cock entering a tight anus with an Apple logo on it. ("Suddenly it all comes together" indeed!).
Anyway, I hope you and other members of our community will join us on our mission, and purchase the exciting new hLife boxed set. Only the boxed set comes with translucent cock rings!
Sincerely,
Harry Rodman
Vice-president
Homosexual Liaison Services
Apple Computer, Inc.
These lawsuits are classic FUD. If they want anecdotal evidence to be the barometer for measuring Apple's performance, than we "Mac zealots" can churn it out as fast as the trolls. I've had an iBook G3 for more than two years now with *gasp* no problems! The closest thing I have to a problem is a white spot on the display that came from dropping my shoulder bag on a rainy day. Meanwhile, my friend broke the hinge on his 15" Powerbook himself, called up Apple, and got them to fix it for him. His total turnaround time was less than a week. Apple's customer service is insanely nice. If you can't get them to replace your broken hardware, odds are its because the customer service rep can smell the BS on your breath. Or am I the only one who finds it suspicious the iPod batteries suck campaign started AFTER Apple decided to offer a battery swapping program?
This is FUD. Pure, uncut FUD.
as some other users have pointed out, complaintss about iPod's battery not being eternal and/or easily replaceable are absolutely ridiculous.
Listen, just because you're KICKING yourself because you didn't buy an extended warranty 1 month earlier (you can extend the warranty via AppleCare literally any time while the standard warranty is in effect) doesn't mean that Apple is to blame for your failure to act.
Products break. Murphy's law (more or less) dictates that they will break at the most inopportune time. You cannot change that. What you can do is prepare for the inevitable.
What I see when I look at all the people complaining about their iBook failing one month out of warranty are a bunch of individuals who bought the bottom-of-the-barrel portable for bottom-of-the-barrel cash and then were too cheap to extend the warranty.
This is a warranty issue. The vast majority of people are working carefree. What is happening is that a minority of customers are making a major ruckus and then see each other making a ruckus and then proclaiming themselves the majority. This is merely the internet version of a phenomenon that is as old as mankind itself.
If Apple does anything to satisfy you whiny little brats it'll be a PR move, nothing more. The hardware works fine for the vast majority of users. It's only the individuals that abuse the hardware that are suffering, and these same individuals are equally lacking in enough brains to prepare for the inevitable.
If you refuse to learn from your mistakes, you're going to suffer for a very, very long time. Do you want to hear horror stories about VERY EXPENSIVE Dell, Toshiba, and IBM laptops failing multiple times IN warranty, then failing less than 1 day AFTER the warranty expires? And then the company doing nothing to placate the customer? Crap, kid, if it failed a month after the warranty, consider yourself lucky.