Slashdot Mirror
The Absolute Worst Working Environment?
goodEvans writes "As I write this, there is a window open behind me with a small jet engine outside. This is supplying vast amounts of compressed air to the aircraft undergoing heavy maintenance in the hangar right outside my door. There is a 6-inch diameter air hose going through the office and out the door. All this requires that I sit at my desk wearing a body warmer to keep out the cold, and both ear defenders AND ear plugs to keep out the noise! And this will go on for half a day once a week! What are the worst conditions you have ever had to work under?" Can you top that? (If top is the word ...)
Check out the amazing Yoshi girl and her playful tentacle friend! Rides starting soon at $29.99 (Saddle not included; children ride for half-price).
/.'ers. In the meantime try these other quality sites for all your horny geek fanboy needs:
.com venture
Yoshi-girl is genetically engineered to be in constant sexual heat and is guaranteed to pounce on even the smelliest nerd with little coaxing! Spending a few hours with Yoshi-girl is sure to be the most gratifying experience you've had in years. Don't believe us? Just look at these testimonials from previous customers:
Hunched over in that uncomfortable chair writing Linux kernel code all day was really tense. Human girls wouldn't come near me, but Yoshi-girl treated me like I was the last man on Earth. Two thumbs up!
-- Linus Torvalds
Sure she's not human, but it sure beats all the sleazy Mexican whores I've been with, and believe me, I've been with more than you can count. You go Yoshi!
-- Miguel De Icaza
You gotta love the 2-foot-long tongue.
-- Richard Stallman
Official webpage with registration info and pricing coming soon, be patient
Lara Croft Land
Natalie Portman covered with hot grits
RMS gone wild!
CowboyNeal: behind the blubber
Taco's new
# Important Smurfs: Please try to keep posts on Smurfette.
# Try to spooge on other people's comments instead of starting new threads (of semen.)
# Read George Bush's subliminablble messages before posting your own to avoid simply duplicating what has already been said. (Like George W and his Dad)
# Use a clear lubricant that describes what your message is about.
# Offtopic, Inflammatory, Inappropriate, Illegal, or Offensive comments might be NAZI-Fied. (You can read everything, even moderated posts, by adjusting your threshold on the Loser Rights Page)
# If you want replies to your trolls sent to you, consider logging in or creating a trolling account.
Problems regarding accounts or comment posting should be sent to Hitler
# Important Smurfs: Please try to keep posts on Smurfette.
# Try to spooge on other people's comments instead of starting new threads (of semen.)
# Read George Bush's subliminablble messages before posting your own to avoid simply duplicating what has already been said. (Like George W and his Dad)
# Use a clear lubricant that describes what your message is about.
# Offtopic, Inflammatory, Inappropriate, Illegal, or Offensive comments might be NAZI-Fied. (You can read everything, even moderated posts, by adjusting your threshold on the Loser Rights Page)
# If you want replies to your trolls sent to you, consider logging in or creating a trolling account.
Problems regarding accounts or comment posting should be sent to Hitler
# Important Smurfs: Please try to keep posts on Smurfette.
# Try to spooge on other people's comments instead of starting new threads (of semen.)
# Read George Bush's subliminablble messages before posting your own to avoid simply duplicating what has already been said. (Like George W and his Dad)
# Use a clear lubricant that describes what your message is about.
# Offtopic, Inflammatory, Inappropriate, Illegal, or Offensive comments might be NAZI-Fied. (You can read everything, even moderated posts, by adjusting your threshold on the Loser Rights Page)
# If you want replies to your trolls sent to you, consider logging in or creating a trolling account.
Problems regarding accounts or comment posting should be sent
If I may, a brief reality-check for the morning, and a nod to those of us who are being shot at in Iraq today, or dying in a mining accident, or driving for 14 hours straight to meet the company's insane deadlines, or, in a million other ways that geeks with well-paid jobs generally don't understand, working shyte jobs today.
See this?
.
^ That's the world's smallest violin, playing just for goodEvans.
"Oh, I'm so miserable! I have a paying job that still allows me to take the time to whine on Slashdot, yet I'm unhappy! Perhaps if I post my sob story and let other wussies bitch about how much their work environment sucks, it will make my empty useless existence feel whole!"
Be happy you HAVE a job, you little pants-wetter! The economy is in the shithole, programmers are being replaced by dotheads, and unemployment rates are high, and YOU are sitting here waxing about how you're COLD AT WORK?!?! Take that shit to FARK.com ->
On the next Ask Slashdot: "OWWWIE OWWIE OOH OW! I cut my widdle finger on a piece of paper! Now it's bwoody! What should I do? My mommy isn't home to kiss it and make it all better! What have other Slashdotters experieced? I've tried cold water, band-aids, even self-administered stutures! What have you guys discovered?"
Oh yeah, and to keep it on topic and so no one flames me, yes I have a well-paying job as a network administrator. My office is right across the hall from a very nice blind woman who has a German Shepard seeing-eye dog. Problem is, I'm allergic to pet dander, and this causes me to sit and sniffle all day. So you know what I do? I suck it up and pop a few Zyrtec, because you can't tell a blind woman to move her fucking dog.
Yeah, work at Great Basin Internet Services. They'll bend you over and rape you in the ass; without lube, mind you. They rape their customers with high prices, rape the employees with minimum wage, and then rape you some more while you're working there.
Oh yeah, and don't forget the gay sex in the bathroom door. Holy shit that was scary. Shouldn't that shit be illegal to do in public?
there is a lot of truth to this - more than 2 women in a small office spells trouble! Hell, even 2 is risky.
Stop fucking them in the ass with your horse dick, and it may clear up.
Then again, maybe it's all the jizz they're swallowing. IBS has been linked to cum guzzling whores.
Whenever I have problems with demons taking up residence in my brain, I just shoot them. That's right, I said shoot them. Kill 'em all, and let the good lord Jesus sort 'em out.
But seriously, if you're not interested in purging yourself from the gene pool, you need to be on some serious medication, and you need to undergo a lot of counseling. Your religion isn't the solution...it's part of the problem.
Sixth of all, you live in the Mormon capital of Utah, where you can't even buy a decent beer or six to dull the unceasing stinging sensation that is your life.
I am not making this up: a few of the happiest people that I have ever met were those who had just moved out of Utah and finally gotten away from their crazy families and communities.
wow slashdot has really gone downhill allowing crap like this to pass for front page news... who the hell gives a flying *#$(@*#$ about this moron and his stupid job? if it sucks so bad, just quit and find another job... and what's with the moderators? is slashdot no longer about news, and instead becoming a giant blog for people to rant about their personal lives? fsck that!
you should be more worried about shrinkage since your probably so small already
I ain't gots no breaks, can't make no bling bling or benjis in Amish town. They talk that dutch-rectangle-state gibberish and don't drive cars but do have blinkers WTF!!!
Yah whutevah, you knows i be right foo'!! I PITY DA NOOB!!
she should check out the unofficial slashdot faq too.
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
You know, being a slashdot troll just ain't easy. An' everyone seems to think it is. But they're wrong.
First of all, you've got to try to get first post. first post! That's a lot of pressure.
Living conditions ain't good either. You either got to live with your parents, or possibly under a bridge. The bridge is the worst. You always have to deal with those goddamn goats walking over top... it's so hard to concentrate on the very intricate details of goatse.cx when all you hear is "clip clop, clip clop" all day long. Believe me, I know. I used to live under one for a while.
Then you've got all the nasty warts. I know, I know, that's a stereotype.. "trolls have warts, blah blah blah" always gets attacked with "YOU'RE SO STEREOTYPICAL! PREJUDICED PIG!" But I tell ya, it's true. I got warts all over me. Warts on my face, warts on my eyelids, warts on my... well places we just can't talk about here.
But... you know what the worst thing about being a troll is? You gotta sit on your ass all day long, annoying other people, staring at a god damn computer screen. Talk about bad working conditions!
My wife stinks too.