Working Around Bad Luck on the Resume?
Dodger asks: "A year ago I was laid off from my job after 2 1/2 years, shortly after the product I was working on shipped. Later that year, a company moved me 1500 miles from Texas to California, to start working on a promising project, just to have the plug pulled by the corporation that funded it five weeks later, which resulted in another layoff. Now, there's a period of job seeking followed by a five week period of employment, followed by the current job seeking period on my resume. When the companies I interview with ask about that situation I simply explain, while trying not to whine or complain. What do other Slashdot readers do to make 'bad luck' (or bad employer choices) look less bad on their resume, and sound less bad in interviews?"
fake a longer period
I pity the fool who doesn't like BUSH!
I was delivering the morning paper to Malibu Stacy's Dream House, when Stacy came out and asked me if I knew anything about electronics. She led me to the garage, on the pretense that I would help her program the radio stations on her car stereo. With one quick motion she removed my Member's Only jacket, and ripped the buttons off my blue J.C. Penny oxford, exposing my hairless chest. As I started to squirm, she handcuffed me to the gear shift in her Dream Car, and then unbuttoned my pants. Since her hands were on my zipper, I sat motionless as she removed my Toughskins. Now fully exposed, my dick stood straight up as if it was expecting a flag to be raised on it.
As a show of women's equality, it seems that my hands had no moveable parts, but SHE had the Kung-Fu Grip. She wrapped the rubbery hand, already in a masturbatory position, and proceeded to touch my junk liberally. Since she was over forty I felt quite dirty while she was stroking my junk as if she was awaiting a prize. After 2 minutes of this, I shot my load but it just dribbled out of the end of my cock. My nervousness had hampered my shooting ability. As my cum drizzled onto her Kung-Fu Grip, it started to harden, and she no longer had the ability to release The Grip.
Four hours later an emergency room doctor applied a solvent to our conjoined body parts that released her grip on my junk. Unfortunately, the extended period of time stuck in this position has rendered my cock to its "erected length" even when I am not hard. Well, I guess at least I look impressive in the showers.
This should do the trick every time.
Holy shit that is offensive.
Why does the Slashdot staff allow things like this to be posted?
Surely it should be deleted and the poster banned (or even reported)?
Works for me?
"Wats yur name?"
"FUCK A DUCK!"
Invite your future employer to a cockfight!
How would one become intoxicated by a donkey?
Now, there's a period of job seeking followed by a five week period of employment, followed by the current job seeking period on my resume.
Get the interviewer to empathize with you, by noting that we all make mistakes, now and then: "Who'd have guessed those hippies wouldn't pay me $699 for something they could get a better implementation of for free? But hey-hey, honest mistake, right?
"I mean, we expected everybody to settle out of court, just to get us to go away. Imagine my surprise when David explained that IBM has so many lawyers on retainer. Really, who'da thunk it? Honest mistake, right?"
Opinions on the Twiddler2 hand-held keyboard?
There should be restrictions on free speech.
That's right, Keith Olbermann from MSNBC. He's smart, funny, and trustworthy. Let's put him in the White House and improve things for once.
let's just say you don't want to know. oh god, the horror
Scientology documents will get deleted for violating DMCA.
Sorry. I know nothing.
You could always buy Deliver Us from Evil : Defeating Terrorism, Despotism, and Liberalism through this link and help me earn a buck or two. Thanks!
Which HS are you in?
It is Indeed offensive, but speaks more of its Poster than any other thing...
I hope you will find that the vast majority of those whom you will meet here are better described by this excerpt from Appendix B of the Jargon File (from Eric S. Raymond)
entitled "A portrait of J. Random Hacker..."
"The ethnic distribution of hackers is understood by them to be a function of which ethnic groups tend to seek and value education. Racial and ethnic prejudice is notably uncommon and tends to be met with freezing contempt."
Peace!
(google for the rest - a worthshile read!)
HA-HA-HA...your kidding right? Surely no progressive thinking Slashdot reader would recommend a book by that that right wing wacko. The book that you REALLY meant to recommend is "DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY" By Michael Moore. Check out the Amazon review at: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0446 532231/qid=1077164095//ref=pd_ka_1/002-7957827-979 9264?v=glance&s=books&n=507846
Yeah who needs a t-shirt that reads "Teh Man"? $9.99 shipped.SMLXXLXXL
Mod parent 5, Hysterical!!! hahahahahaa
Flamebait is something specifically designed to invoke reaction, with no material. E.g., "FU". My post was not flamebait.
Offtopic means it is not pertinent to the message it was replying to. My response clearly dealt with accepting state-benefits, which is what the parent-poster was talking about.
Moderators need to learn how to read. If you don't agree with a post, that doesn't make it off-topic or flamebait. Over-rated, maybe, but you should note there is no moderation "wrong".
social sciences can never use experience to verify their statemen
So, that's how you get first post!