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What's in Your Gadget Bag, Cory?

Posted by michael on from the looks-like-someone-just-had-a-fax dept.

Cory Doctorow has taken a two-second break from his road warrior ways to pen this description of the crud he lugs around. Read it and weep, wanna-bes.

10 of 400 comments (clear)

  1. re: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    post numero uno

  2. First post! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Hi Everyone!

  3. what's my bag? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    a swedish penis pump, baby!

  4. SHOW AND TELL FROM AN ASSHOLE! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Who the fuck cares what some pussy carries around in his purse? HOLY SHITE Slashdot has finally lost it! Let's look at a list of items owned by some DICK and then let's all jerk off into the bag he carries it all AROUND IN! FUCK YOU!

  5. Re:Hmmmm by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    IN SOVIET RUSSIA, Cory Doctorow is not a gay homosexual faggot.

  6. Sounds like the opening... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic
    What's in Your Gadget Bag, Cory?

    Sounds like the intro to Cummander Taco's gay porno. Of course Rob's the fluffer, he's quite used to that position.

    1. Re:Sounds like the opening... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

      I hear Robbo's a scat man. His bag only has one thing in it, but there's a lot of it.

  7. Re:CmdrTaco by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Yeah, you'd think that Slashdot posters would have even the slightest clue -- especially the ones that get modded up -- but that often turns out to be not the case.

  8. Re:CmdrTaco by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Way to catch on to that sarcasm. Your intellect is blazing!

  9. What's NOT in Cory's Bag: *BSD. Reason: Dead. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic


    Yet another sickening blow has struck what's left of the *BSD community, as a soon-to-be-released report by the independent Commision for Technology Management (CTM) after a year-long study has concluded: *BSD is already dead. Here are some of the commission's findings:

    Fact: the *BSDs have balkanized yet again. There are now no less than twelve separate, competing *BSD projects, each of which has introduced fundamental incompatibilities with the other *BSDs, and frequently with Unix standards. Average number of developers in each project: fewer than five. Average number of users per project: there are no definitive numbers, but reports show that all projects are on the decline.

    Fact: DragonflyBSD, yet another offshoot of the beleaguered FreeBSD "project", is already collapsing under the weight of internal power struggles and in-fighting. "They haven't done a single decent release," notes Mark Baron, an industry watcher and columnist. "Their mailing lists read like an online version of a Jerry Springer episode, complete with food fights, swearing, name-calling, and chair-throwing." Netcraft reports that DragonflyBSD is run on exactly 0% of internet servers.

    Fact: There are almost no FreeBSD developers left, and its use, according to Netcraft, is down to a sadly crippled .005% of internet servers. A recent attempt at a face-to-face summit in Boulder, Colorado culminated in an out-and-out fistfight between core developers. Hotel security guards broke up the melee and banned the participants from the hotel. Two of the developers were hospitalized.

    Fact: NetBSD, which claims to focus on portability (whatever that is supposed to mean), is slow, and cannot take advantage of multiple CPUs. "That about drove the last nail in the coffin for BSD use here," said Michael Curry, CTO of Amazon.com. "We took our NetBSD boxes out to the backyard and shot them in the head. We're much happier running Linux."

    Fact: *BSD has no support from the media. Number of Linux magazines available at bookstores: 5 (Linux Journal, Linux World, Linux Developer, Linux Format, Linux User). Number of available *BSD magazines: 0. Current count of Linux-oriented technical books: 1071. Current count of *BSD books: 6.

    Fact: XFree86 is dropping support for *BSD. The remaining core group believes that the *BSDs have strayed too far from Unix standards and have become too difficult to support along with Linux and Solaris x86. "It's too much trouble," said one anonymous developer. "If they want to make their own standards, let them doing the porting for us."

    Fact: Many user-level applications will no longer work under *BSD, and no one is working to change this. The GIMP, a Photoshop-like application, has not worked at all under *BSD since version 1.1 (sorry, too much trouble for such a small base, developers have said). OpenOffice, a Microsoft Office clone, has never worked under *BSD and never will. ("Why would we bother?" said developer Steven Andrews, an OpenOffice team lead.)

    Fact: servers running OpenBSD, which claims to focus on security, are frequently compromised. According to Jim Markham, editor of the online security forum SecurityWatch, the few OpenBSD servers that exist on the internet have become a joke among the hacker community. "They make a game out of it," he says. "(OpenBSD leader) Theo [de Raadt] will scramble to make a new patch to fix one problem, and they've already compromised a bunch of boxes with a different exploit."

    With these incontroverible facts staring (what's left of) the *BSD community in the face, they can only draw one conclusion: *BSD is already dead.