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Lifting The Lid On Computer Filth

IainMH writes "There's a story over at BBC News about how work stations contain nearly 400 times as many microbes than lavatories. Gross. 'A desk is capable of supporting 10 million bacteria and the average office contains 20,961 germs per square inch, according to research. ... By contrast, the average toilet seat contains 49 germs per square inch, the survey showed.'"

25 of 567 comments (clear)

  1. No more Computer-TV tray by prozac79 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does this mean I have to stop using the top of my computer as a food tray? It was so convinient to be able to place a plate and glass on top of the case while I'm working.

    --
    "Oh dear, she's stuck in an infinite loop and he's an idiot" -Prof. Farnsworth (Futurama)
    1. Re:No more Computer-TV tray by kfg · · Score: 4, Funny

      But not as well as my ENIAC. 200 kilowatts of food warming power, and you can actually tuck your bagel right down between he vacuum tubes, for a nice, even, all over warm. Several thousand of them at the same time, if it comes to that.

      Not like the stupid little chared spot modern CPUs leave.

      No, when it comes to warming food the old machines are clearly superiour.

      KFG

  2. Mandatory Porn reference. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Of course they're filthier! Toilets just have people sitting on them. There's no end to the fetishes explored on personal workstations across the globe!

  3. but are the microbes "bad"? by PopCulture · · Score: 5, Funny

    the "lick test"

    lick a public toilet seat you'll probably get real sick

    lick your desk and your work mates will just think you're a freak.

    --

    Here's to finally giving Bush his exit strategy in November
    1. Re:but are the microbes "bad"? by chunkwhite86 · · Score: 4, Funny

      The excrement is expelled (around) once a day.

      You are not eating enough fiber!

      the excrement only touches a small portion in the center of the ass, whereas the toilet seat contacts the washed cheek.

      While generally true, this may not apply to some of my coworkers. I've seen large tracts of fecal matter smeared across the toilet seats at work. Either someone here has an anatomically incorrect anus, or their shitting technique needs improvement. Either way, there are some most unpristine asses around here.

      Add to that the fact that commercial toilets are generally disinfected once a day. When's the last time you saw a doorknob being disinfected?

      Makes sense... but I'd still rather shake your hand than grip your ass cheek. ;-)

      --
      I'd rather be a conservative nutjob than a liberal with no nuts and no job.
    2. Re:but are the microbes "bad"? by JabberWokky · · Score: 5, Funny
      Makes sense... but I'd still rather shake your hand than grip your ass cheek. ;-)

      After hearing about your coworker's issues, maybe I'll just wave. :)

      --
      Evan

      --
      "$30 for the One True Ring. $10 each additional ring!" -- JRR "Bob" Tolkien
  4. I guess we really DO need... by Trolling4Dollars · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...telephone sanitisers.

  5. Re:Surprising? by Professor_Quail · · Score: 4, Funny

    speak for yourself!

  6. Not quite the same by Tom7 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yeah, but the germs on my desk come from my hands and nose, not other people's asses.

  7. Metastory reports: by xenotrout · · Score: 5, Funny

    Everything is dirtier than a toilet! It's really that simple. Everyone should start making things out of toilets.
    1) Find everything to be dirtier than toilets
    2) Make things out of toilets
    3) Profit!
    There's no missing step! Well, except that these things will not actually be toilets, and thus will be found dirtier than toilets. But why? Because people know that toilets are "dirty", and thus clean them! So many things are assumed to be clean because they are not specifically used in a way that would seem to make them dirty, and so they don't get cleaned. No story here, move along.

  8. My worst experience as a tech. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    User: My keyboard doesn't work.

    Me: Ok I'll go check it out.

    Me (later): Ok, keyboard keys are sticky... and there is no software problem... and there are a lot of porn sites in the browser cache........

    Me resigns.

  9. You people made a mistake by superpulpsicle · · Score: 4, Funny

    The dirtiest part of the computer is really windows. That's where millions of virus exist.

  10. Re:Hmmm.... by Jardine · · Score: 5, Funny

    Now if you combined the food rich environment of your keyboard with the poison producing bacteria from your colon, you start to have a real problem.

    So what you're saying is that I should not shit on my keyboard. Good to know.

  11. Re:Hmmm.... by ElizabethP · · Score: 5, Funny
    So what you're saying is that I should not shit on my keyboard. Good to know.

    It sounds like someone holds prejudicial opinions regarding keyboard-shitters. To each his/her own, yeah? :-( Granted, my friends have a complete aversion to my keyboard, but that's the way I like it.

  12. Re:Surprising? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    In soviet russia, ass sneezes on YOU!

  13. Re:Hmmm.... by noidentity · · Score: 5, Funny

    "...a product called "Microban" into their keyboards and mice, to create an environment where bacteria cannot survive and grow."

    Darn it! I knew there was a use for that old Russian monitor that glowed even when it was unplugged. Curse modern low-emissions monitors!

  14. Just to be on the safe side by commodoresloat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Best not to stick the keyboard in your colon either.

    1. Re:Just to be on the safe side by pyrrhonist · · Score: 5, Funny
      Best not to stick the keyboard in your colon either.

      There's already a colon on the keyboard. Oh, wait...

      --
      Show me on the doll where his noodly appendage touched you.
  15. I have a shitty keyboard by zakezuke · · Score: 5, Funny

    Damn microsoft natural keyboard

    --
    There is no sanctuary. There is no sanctuary. SHUT UP! There is no shut up. There is no shut up.
  16. do what? by real_smiff · · Score: 4, Funny
    "I open the PC and blow all the crap out, including the drives and fans."
    Well that is thorough, but don't come near my PC, please.
    --

    This is my Sig, this is my Gun. One is for Slashdot and one is for Fun.

  17. Re:Not Surprising at All... by A+Bugg · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sure blame the "new job" for all of your warts. I think we all know the REAL reasons you got all those warts.

  18. Re:Ho hum. by chunkwhite86 · · Score: 4, Funny

    toilet bowl gets cleaned with the really nice smelling (wtf is that, anybody know, mint?) blue stuff every two weeks or so...

    If you think the blue piss puck smells like "mint", then I must advise you; what you've been chewing for the past fifteen minutes is probably NOT gum.

    --
    I'd rather be a conservative nutjob than a liberal with no nuts and no job.
  19. Re:Don't use your hands on washroom doorhandles. by teamhasnoi · · Score: 4, Funny
    I think doors aren't supposed to open into a hallway; always into a room. This must be to keep people from getting a facefull of door when they walk down the hall. I hate touching poop-handles too.

    I recall brainstorming a way to actually prevent someone from leaving the restroom without washing their hands. I was at Applebee's of all places, and at least 5 different guys walked out of the bathroom without even a glance at the sink. I went through a million different technical ways and all were easily circumvented. I noticed when I washed my hands in the bathroom, others were more likely to as well.

    I finally figured that the best way was to have either a hot chick sit by the door and say, "Did you wash your hands?", or a withered old one-eyed crone point a translucent finger at those who didn't and scream, "UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!".

    Maybe follow them into the resturant if they refuse. "UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN! Shun him who walks among you - UNCLEAN!"

  20. Re:Hmmm.... by thinkliberty · · Score: 4, Funny

    Is the licking of microban safe? Because sometimes I read something funny and coffee squirts out my nose so I have to lick my keyboard.

  21. The userbase must be pretty sad... by zakezuke · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...when the mods consider "don't pick your asshole and THEN use the keyboard" to be informative. Is slashdot hygiene really this awful?

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    There is no sanctuary. There is no sanctuary. SHUT UP! There is no shut up. There is no shut up.