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Revised Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness

DBarefoot writes "Last August, my Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness was submitted to Slashdot. Some folks found it at least mildly amusing, and I received a bunch of submissions of documentation weirdness from Slashdotters and others. So we've just posted an updated version of the Hall, with more than twice the images and easier navigation."

35 of 122 comments (clear)

  1. Yowzers by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    That is pretty weird. But not as weird as some stories I've read here.

  2. Extreme Weirdness by Bob+Gelumph · · Score: 2, Funny

    The weirdness in my work project is that the documentation is missing. I keep meaning to write a comment or two, but with 12000 lines now, I just never seem to get around to it.

    --
    I'm gonna need a spec.
    1. Re:Extreme Weirdness by Mal-2 · · Score: 2, Informative

      Sounds like you need a round tuit.

      There are a lot of things we all would do, if we only got a round tuit.

      Mal-2

      --
      How is the Riemann zeta function like Trump rallies? Both have an endless number of trivial zeros.
    2. Re:Extreme Weirdness by ErichTheWebGuy · · Score: 3, Funny

      documentation = sex:

      even when you think you have enough, it is not nearly sufficient

      --
      bash: rtfm: command not found
  3. Is this a test of the /. effect? by Deton8 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    OK, seriously, you really are just load testing your web server, right? This site is has collapsed under the /. effect with only one comment posted, in the middle of the night USA time.

    1. Re:Is this a test of the /. effect? by bgog · · Score: 2, Informative

      If you subscribe you can see the stories a bit early. It was slashdotted BEFORE it appeared on the main page. You just have to wonder.

    2. Re:Is this a test of the /. effect? by ViGe · · Score: 2, Interesting

      It was slashdotted BEFORE it appeared on the main page.


      No it wasn't. I have not subscribed, and thus could read the story only after it appeared on the main page. I could check the index page and two images before the slashdot effect killed the site.

      --
      It has to work - rfc1925
  4. Ohhhh dear.. by Debug+This · · Score: 2, Funny
    This album has 36 pictures in total

    Lets see, average of 5k.. multiply by the average amount of slashdot readers.. that works out to arouuunnnnnddd...

    *ahem*, remember to tell me what the afterlife is like.

  5. hi by pytsun · · Score: 2, Funny

    hi i am an software engineer from india, can someone pliz explain what is documentation?

    1. Re:hi by g-san · · Score: 3, Funny

      It's an optional deliverable after the "release" phase in the software development process. Usually obsolete, just read the code.

  6. japanese signs at other site... by tiedemann · · Score: 3, Informative

    Since the page seems to be /.-ed, I thought someone might want to read up on funny signs and stuff at www.engrish.com.

  7. Re:wow by liamchristopher · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Ya know, for my job I proofread and rewrite Japanese books. I dont think there is a worse language, japanese people have just enough comprehension of english to mangle it in astounding ways. Plus, with katakana, they are under the impression that the way they write/pronounce things is the same way as english speakers. Then again, the people I work with thought Schwarzenegger was American. They also think Green Day is punk. Go Figure.

  8. This one brought back memories by Concerned+Onlooker · · Score: 4, Funny
    I've actually seen this one first hand. It's in the instructions for the heating packet for MREs (Meals Ready to Eat). I had taken my girlfriend out to Joshua Tree National Park where another friend of mine met us. I had taken the trouble to bring along a wok and all the ingredients for stir fry but my friend had brought along a box of these MREs filched from his recent stint in the service.

    The kicker is that my (ex) girlfriend decided she'd rather have the MREs. I mean, come on, even bad stir fry is better than an MRE, and I know from first hand experience. Except for that one time I found a Band-Aid in my Buddha's Delight....

    --
    http://www.rootstrikers.org/
    1. Re:This one brought back memories by Bushcat · · Score: 2, Funny
      It's in the instructions for the heating packet for MREs

      I actually have several dozen of the things for reasons too stupid to go into. Other warnings include

      "vapors released ... contain hydrogen, a flammable gas"

      and

      "when ten or more heaters are used...".

      I tested the ten-heater threat model by collecting the 'vapors' in a plastic bag then exposing the contents to a match in a scientifically, controlled manner (i.e. I closed my eyes).

      Basically, it's a ten-minute fart with the ability to singe eyebrows and deafen.

  9. Re:Yes, but does it come in plaid? by jpop32 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Makes me think about those stupid consumer warning labels, and how dumb someone must have been to actually do something that stupid.

    The warning labels are not put for the benefit of stupid people. They are put so stupid people don't sue them after doing the exact stupid thing that the label describes.

  10. Mirror (site looking like its about to buckle) by Zardus · · Score: 5, Informative

    There's a mirror here. Enjoy.

    --
    You can mod your friends, you can mod your nose, but you can't mod your friend's nose.
  11. IF Slashdot by MartyJG · · Score: 2, Funny

    Room: Slashdot Main Page

    Directly in front of you are several stories. You notice a story about Quake with the notice 'Read More' beneath it.

    >click notice

    Room: Weekly Obfuscated Quake Story

    You are now in an area that seems vaguely familiar. You immediately notice several trolls that are already attacking both the Quake story and a purple dinosaur.

    Your score is currently +5 moderator points.

    >attack trolls with mod points

    You use all of your moderator ammo on the trolls, taking out a handful. There are still a few trolls left, but they leave you alone. The Quake story is now being protected by sensible readers, but the purple dinosaur is a hill of beans.

    You see an opportunity for a karma kit. You see a notice marked 'Reply'.

    >hit reply

    You now see a Quake story with your post listed near the bottom, but in front of the trolls who are now attacking each other. Two moderators enter the room, closely followed by an Anonymous Coward and two morons who don't know how to read.

    >hit submit story

    Your post has drawn the attention of the others in the room. The faint smell of flamebait seems to be coming from just below your post. Five trolls have suddenly come back to life!

    >attack flamebait with witty reply

    Your witty attack has shot down one of the non-reading morons. One of the moderators takes care of the Anonymous Coward - he runs off to foul up some other room. The other moderator leaves behind a karma point.

    Victory is yours!

    --
    insignificant sig
  12. ...is a lot like sex by ControversialPosting · · Score: 4, Funny

    It sends you on wild goose chases for years, trying the silliest of things, eventually leading to the point where you give up and do it yourself.

  13. Re:Reminds me... by jesser · · Score: 3, Informative

    You could be thinking of This is Broken. I think it's funny and not anal, but maybe I've been hanging out around usability experts to much.

    Btw, today's entry is hilarious.

    --
    The shareholder is always right.
  14. Re:Insanity! by kundor · · Score: 2, Interesting
    when will http incorporate bittorrent technology, that's what I want to know.

    Then the slashdot effect would be no more!

  15. Documentation for international audiences by wine · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is a funny article that featured on slashdot a couple of years ago. I describes the differences in culture one has to pay attention to while writing technical documentation for international audiences. For instance:

    And while Italian and French users were very happy with printer documentation that included pictures of naked women with slim, strategically placed tinted bars showing how colors were reproduced, Esposito doubts that particular manual will be used anywhere else.

  16. The posting by Mr_Silver · · Score: 5, Funny
    Revised Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness
    Posted by simoniker on Thursday April 01, @08:26AM from the you-only-live-twice dept.

    DBarefoot writes "Last August, my Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness was killed by Slashdot. Some folks found it at least mildly amusing that a poor server should die in such agony, and I received a bunch of submissions of documentation weirdness from Slashdotters and others. Given that I've run out of spoons to gouge my eyes out, I've decided that I might as well kill the server for a second time."

    --
    Avantslash - View Slashdot cleanly on your mobile phone.
  17. Re:Reminds me... by pixel.jonah · · Score: 2, Informative

    Or better yet I'd highly recommend any of Donald Norman's books.

  18. I'm off to RTFA now? by blorg · · Score: 2, Funny
    I'm of the RTFA now?

    That's what you think.

  19. Re:You are horrible racist little turd. by david.gilbert · · Score: 5, Insightful
    Although they don't write documentation ;-)

    That is because they are programmers, not because they are Indians. ;-)

  20. It all depends ... by Secrity · · Score: 2, Insightful

    In this case it depends upon how you look at it:

    If you do it because you enjoy watching a server fry, you are a sadist.

    If you do it because you enjoy your pain of having your server fry, you are masochistic.

  21. Re:Are there any languages .... by the_twisted_pair · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yes. American.

  22. Reading it quickly.. by Tracer_Bullet82 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I read "revised hell of technical documentation"

    --


    Timang tinggi tinggi
    parang sudah asah
    alang alang mandi
    biar sampai basah
  23. Re:Maybe someone who's British ... by the+real+darkskye · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Not for pressing trousers, but they do make great cheese toasties

    --
    Music is everybody's possession.
    It's only publishers who think that people own it.
    Fuck Beta
    ~John Lenno
  24. I can't figure out how to use this... by descentr · · Score: 3, Funny

    One of the oddest things I've seen as far as documentation goes would have to be on the back of a package of doorstops I bought at Wal-Mart a couple years back. Take a look at this.

    1. Re:I can't figure out how to use this... by Bob+Cat+-+NYMPHS · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Notice they show the stop being used on the opening side of the door. That is because someone might try to slam the door without realizing the stop is there. It's pretty easy to damage hollowcore interior doors.

      But I'm sure you already knew not to use a stop on the closing side, right?

  25. Re:Military labeling by SEWilco · · Score: 2, Funny
    Is "Front Toward Enemy" on the front of a Claymore, or is it on the back so you can read it when it is properly placed?
    I can never remember which way it is.
    Ow.

    If you can read this, you are the enemy.

  26. Inclusiveness by SEWilco · · Score: 2, Funny

    Is the Hall of Technical Documentation Weirdness also technical documentation weirdness, so it should include itself?

  27. Re:Military labeling by tlhIngan · · Score: 2, Funny

    That's why it's usually stated as "This side towards enemy", thereby eliminating the confusing "which way is front" question.

  28. SAIYAN WIELD WAYS AND MEANS by subtropolis · · Score: 2, Interesting
    for those who didn't get in before the slashdotting, here's one of my favorites (i *think* i got it accurately, but it's so hard to tell...) "Winding finger have got bloodstream not walk. Throagh of peril." - that's priceless.

    WARNING

    1. With appertain rotor of screw setting pre ceiling on the under standing that scre no wield. May wield two-faced, pressboard securing. wield pre to begin with wiping ceilingof bilge dasto.
    2. Thread of length need half as many again as tad.
    3. Open toy of batteries shuck. Verification batteries.+,- whereafter stow down, to a certainty need locknat lest take place accident.
    4. Hook through toys apside of hole.
    5. Needs switches shoving NO,for pre arrows specifying of orention shoving.Pack it up time, withbold toy pate, need switches shoving OFF.
    * Prythee no sport with stingy or play asperity game. Winding finger have got bloodstream not walk.
    Throagh of peril.
    * Tad disport of time grown man tatelage.
    * Till the cowcomes home.Wield toys damage, burn-in prythee wind to a close wield.
    * Give attention to open/close toys,therefore take place peril.for instance slipup batteries wield result in the emission of heat rupture liquid.vent itself prythee pay attention.
    * Play at sith to a certainty bolt up power supply fetch out batteries.
    * Batteries no electification dissolution.plunge ioto aquator fire.
    * Not trust for tad batteries lest in advertent eat off. In the event of accident without loss of time plytheepillroller tuke order with.

    May pre house the seamy side volitation!!!
    WARNING [with an assortment of odd icons]

    --
    "Our interests are to see if we can't scale it up to something more exciting," he said.