Slashdot Mirror
Using the internet for free food?
GreyOrange writes "With all the offers for free food on the internet how can a hungry person differitiate between the bogus ones and the ones that fill the tummy? One legitimate offer I've found so far is from www.jellybelly.com were they give you a free sample. But theres a tremendous amount of websites that are missleading and offering food in exchange for credit application and other horrible things like spam and never living up to their end of the deal. Got any good websites for free edibles, how about other things that might be of equal value that are not bogus. How about some methods you have picked up for all you veterans out there. Is there a directery out there that is true to its word, how about a wikipedia page?"
God help the poor slob that first discovers slashdot on today of all days!
Nothing to do with food, but there are several car dealers that have ads like "If you don't get approved, we'll pay you $100!"
Step 1) Ruin Credit Horribly.
Step 2) Go around town applying for car loans.
Step 3) Rake in the free dough!
Someone fetch me when it is April 2nd.
I often get free food from computers by inverting the keyboards on public use terminals and shaking them. Usually there is a great variety of crumbs from many different kinds of cookies and crackers.
I metamoderate, therefore I am
The day is not over yet..
I usually am a troll (I try to get upmoderated, as opposed to the lamer crapflooding, though), but I actually have to admit that I like the "real submissions unedited", if they truly are real submissions.
It is a pretty good way to see some of the lamest submissions that make it into Ask Slashdot - the ones that get posted are often lame, but these are orders of magnitude beyond that.
I vote to keep it.
Those people out there that don't think today's April Fools posts are funny is because you fail to realize that these are normal submissions the editors have to deal with on a daily basis.
Please take note of the from the real-submissions-unedited dept. subtitle under each post. These posts were submitted as serious questions and that's what makes them so funny. I think it's great that the editors are sharing with us some of the lamest posts that they've had to read through.
Keep 'em coming!
infested with jello like fishes no melotron wishes
Please don't laugh. This is a true story. It happened to the sister of a friend of a colleague of someone I know.
She logged onto a web site, expecting to find some innocent pop-up p0rn and dialer windows. Instead, she got a popup reading "Click here and get a free pizza!" Like a fool, she clicked on the popup. A few minutes and a registration page later, she got an email titled "Read this, activate your free pizza delivery!".
You know what she should have done. Delete the email. Just delete it and forget about it. But no, what did she do? She opened it and read it. The email read: "Thank you for opening this email. Through the magic of Outlook Security we have run a software agent that has activated your PC's modem and dialed our central computer. Using called-id we have identified your telephone number and we now know your name, street number, and postal code. The pizza you have ordered is SPICY BEEF and will be delivered to your door in TEN MINUTES".
You could tell from the capitals that SOMETHING TERRIBLE was going on.
The pizza arrived. Inexorably, like a hangover on Sunday morning, a small white van drove up to the house and a man stepped out, dressed in white and carrying a flat pizza tray.
What could she do? "Run!" I hear you scream. "Hide", perhaps? "Release the hounds?" No, she calmly opened the door and accepted the pizza box.
Open... the... box...
Open... the... box...
The smell of warm pizza did a BDSM on her conscious mind and she found herself opening the pizza box...
What did she find?
( ) A Hot'n spicy Beef pizza for four
( ) A CD-ROM labelled "Do Not Play"
( ) A mercedes, a portable phone, and a laughing Dutchman
( ) CowboyNeal
( ) Yes
( ) I'm a vegetarian, you insensitive clod!
Well, the answer is stranger than any of these. She found a small piece of paper. Printed on it were the words: "Missing field! Please click back and enter full name!"
Ceci n'est pas une signature
I really wish michael wasn't at the helm today. The crap that's getting posted is roll-your-eyes, "we're supposed to laugh because it's so stupid" humor, which most of us outgrew after 9th grade.
The April Fool's Days in the past used to be great because you never knew which was real and which was fake. A really absurd story might have this strange grain of reality in it, and it would turn out to be true. Then the seemingly benign announcement would turn out to be a great prank. People would still be referencing the April Fool's posts in their comments on April 2nd.
The point of an April Fool's joke is to actually fall for the joke. Not this lame, "it's stupid so we'll post it" strategy that michael is employing. Real-life l33t names? Usenet audio? Using the internet for free food? These barely even qualify as April Fool's jokes. Most of them aren't even trying to fool you with anything. Posting really stupid shit isn't funny, and it's not clever.
What's worse, I know of several groups that crafted well-done April Fool's jokes and submitted them for today, and they have been rejected. Their greatness was that some of them were half-true, some were false but had entire websites and everything set up, and some were completely absurd but totally true.
Instead, we get "Using the internet for free food?"
weeklyfreebie.com They actually have a list of "free food" sites.