Slashdot Mirror
Securing Pricelessness
DeliBoy writes "In light of public discussions over security after The Scream was stolen, CSO Online offers an interesting look at museum security. The article details a system designed without budget restrictions intended to secure a painting in a public gallery. Interesting how the consultant balances public access with the need for security, comprised of redundant vibration sensors, overlapping microwave and infrared motion sensors, and an old-fashioned guard. "
Create a super strong plastic box filled with a toxic substance (radioactive/chemical) that's not damaging to the art and have a guard stand outside while another looks on in a camera room somewhere else?
Security - $699
Museum Ticket - $17
Pricelessness - Priceless!
A beowulf cluster of sec....no
Securing my preciiouusss...no
1. Steal Priceless Object 2. ???? 3. Profit!!!
...do they mean one that always opens doors and pulls our chairs for the ladies, or one that shakes his fist at teen-aged whippersnappers?
Put a fake on display, and hide the real one somewhere else.
Keller likes to alarm windows and fasten them closed whenever possible.
Didn't anyone tell him that proprietary closed windows models are inherently insecure and that an open-window solution is the better route?
Moo.
Snipers nest with a view of the door...or at least someone outside the place to see the getaway.
I was hoping this was going to be an article about people getting caught in comprising positions.
Send out the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you?
I'm not out of order! You're out of order! The whole freaking system's out of order!
Yes, although I suspect you would have a hard time doing it covertly.
It's getting to you can't even speak without infringing someone's bs copyrights : "drivers wanted" (VW), "do the right thing" (Quaker Oats), "just do it" (Nike), "hello, world" (SCO).
Why not embed them in each artwork?
Because generally, it's easy to tell when a priceless work of art has been stolen without checking the logs at the exit door.
Yes, you're quite correct. I keep my stolen paintings in the attic.
A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.
Here's an idea
1. Make them carry an RFID badge as a condition of entry.
2. Track how much they eat at the caffeteria, or if they go to take a dump
3. Weigh them on the way in, and weight them on the way out.
Send lawyers, guns, and money!
Smithers! Release the robotic Richard Simmons.
Send lawyers, guns, and money!