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Online Dating Advice?
frankgod asks: "I'm a 25/M/US geek who managed to get through school with my singleness intact. I plan on staying single for a while into the future, but I am considering online dating in addition to other methods of meeting local women for casual dating. Any advice on particular sites and tweaking profiles or search results? I've looked at eHarmony , Lavalife (sparse local results) and Match.com (seems to be best of the bunch.)"
If you're looking for "casual" dating, eHarmony is out. Even they will tell you that. Match.com is probably the best known, and so it's probably also your best bet.
eharmony.com: only for people who are abjectly terrified of meeting people. They jump through tons of hoops to make sure you won't ever have to talk to people you might not like. This site is only for people who are unwilling to take risks. Frankly, I don't know how one can date at all without taking risks so I think this site is dumb.
match.com: the biggest, but also one of the most annoying. Their user interface is horrible (you may have to try several browsers or (eek) IE), they delete your emails, and it's expensive ($20/month). Frankly after sending messages to people for a while it's useful to go back and see who you've emailed before and what you said. Because most of the time, the first email will go unanswered.
Spring Street Networks: These guys have a number of sites including personals.theonion.com, personals.nerve.com, and about 12 others. This has some of the most clever, interesting personals out there. They're also cheap. You buy "credits" and use them when you want to (usually $1 to email someone -- but only the first time). So unless you're contacting a lot of people, It's very difficult to work up to the $20/month the other sites charge.
personals.yahoo.com: Also a decent site, personals are less interesting than spring street, but they have more people. The link to yahoo's instant messenger is nice too.
hotornot.com: (and similar) So simple even a monkey could figure it out, so monkeys generally do. It's nice because it's noncommittal. On the other sites, many people are basically looking for a husband, or a commitment from the first. Personally, I can't meet people under those kind of expectations. Maybe after a while, but not up front. So it's eas(ier) to meet people casually. It's also pretty cheap. $6/month, IIRC.
Online dating is a weird thing. It went basically nowhere for me and I gave up after about a year. I moved to a new place and didn't know anyone so thought this might be interesting. However you end up only meeting people one-on-one. Nobody wants to invite someone they met online to go out in a group of friends. Everyone feels weird about it. So, it was an awful way to build a circle of friends in a new place. Expect that you will only get responses about 1/10 of the time. The ratio of guys to girls on these sites is terrible. Also guys will have to write people, often. You have to work hard at it.
Lastly, work on your profile. Most profiles are shit. Pay attention to what you like and dislike in other profiles, and continue to improve yours. Chances are it will suck at the start, but will get better. Also get a good picture of yourself. It's important.