Dilbert's Ultimate House

angkor writes "Dilbert's Ultimate House (DUH) is the product of the combined wisdom of thousands of Dilbert readers, plus the help of real world experts, and it's online for viewing at dilbert.com/duh. Are you tired of tripping over the cat's litter box in your bathroom? Dilbert's house has its own bathroom just for the cat. Do you hate dragging a Christmas tree into the house every December just to throw it away in January? Dilbert's house has a huge closet off of the Great Room where he stores a fully decorated artificial tree on wheels..."

Comments

soil

[fiftyLou]

Come on.
That greenhouse needs a good hydroponics system if Dilbert's looking to get any quality chronic.

the problem with unconventional houses

[WormholeFiend]

is that in some areas, you simply cannot build them, because your neighbours might complain that your house makes their house's property value go down.

I live in such an area. :(

6000 sq. ft. house for a single geek?

[hattig]

hahaha, it includes a "kids room" ... like that'll ever happen.

And as for the exercise room, yeah right.

Home theatre, yes. Home office, yes. He doesn't need a double bed.

And yes, 6000 sq. ft. in the area of Silicon Valley too ... lol.

Still, it looks pretty and is more sensible about making areas of the house that will be used rather than not used.

Re:Never heard of that.

[American AC in Paris]

If you don't have a basement keep it somewhere where no one goes.

As someone who has lived in his share of one bedroom apartments, I can safely say that a good chunk of cat owners don't have such places in their residence.

Bedroom, living/dining room, kitchen, middle of the hallway, bathroom: take your pick...

Not quite ultimate

[BrK]

IMO, the ultimate house has no cats, but thats just me.

The exercise room is woefully inadequate. And the "Wiring Center" is pitifully small. My home theater room alone has more cables than that. I have an entire wiring closest that is about 8'x 10' with many dozen runs of Cat5 and RG6 coming into it (for a house that is not yet 100% wired, and only about 70% of the size of the DUH.

Re:Kids, Wife?

[datastalker]

When Scott Adams put this project out to the DNRC, he said that it had to be a house that could *eventually* hold a wife and kids, and remarked that it was, after all, Dilbert.

He also suggested that we (I'm a member of the DNRC of course ;) ) might make the house so wonderful that Dilbert could use it to attract a potential wife.

Since it's a no maintenance house and has separate areas for the pets and kids, it may stand a chance of achieving that goal! ;)

Where's the damn price tag ?

[elpapacito]

Beautiful house, very much approaching an engineer mentality...but hey no matter what I couldn't find a cost extimate or a decent cost analysis.

Point being...my dear Scott, Dilberts out there probably will never be able to afford that house considering the rabbit exponential breeding rate of pointy haired bosses.

It doesn't matter what they WANT!

[Medievalist]

I assume you don't have kids?

What they WANT is nothing that is practical or good for them, at least until they are teenagers (then, they still don't want healthy practical things, but there is no longer any point in trying to fight the tide).

What you need is things they don't INSTANTANEOUSLY DESTROY. That's the parent's guideline, take it from me.

For example, in the "kids bathroom" of the DUH there is a sink cantilevered out from the wall. BRZZZT! No fly zone!!

If you actually construct this thing with a support system that will prevent kiddies from ripping it off the wall (something involving huge stainless steel beams and multi-ton weights, I think) when they and their little friends start doing the mambo on the countertop, then somebody will split his little forehead open when chasing his (shorter) sister through the room and not ducking fast enough. If you pad the edge, it will get ripped apart the first time said little sister passes through the room carrying a cat frantic to escape the Tea Party of Doom. The cat will be leaving gouges a quarter inch deep in the mouldings, so you can kiss your padded bolster goodbye.

The towel rack off the front of the sink, that's a GREAT idea, though. It'll soak up at least a tenth of the fifty gallons of water any four-year old spills while "washing his hands".

Re:Kids, Wife?

[mikewas]

Naw, marriage wasn't the intent. It's just that by the time an engineer has figured out what's going on they're already married.

This could be a poll question. If you're married, what was it that you really wanted:

A. laid

B. blow job ...

I can't believe how many times I've heard a newlywed engineer say: "All I wanted was ".