Global Warming Expected to Intensify Hurricanes
DoraLives writes "Think this hurricane season was bad? Well according to the New York Times, a study was published online on Tuesday by The Journal of Climate indicating that warming ocean temperatures are going to make for stronger, wetter hurricanes in the coming years and decades. An abstract of the article concludes cheerfully enough that 'greenhouse gas-induced warming may lead to a gradually increasing risk in the occurrence of highly destructive category-5 storms.' Oh joy."
GNAA introduces first open-source corpse
GNAP [Gay Nigger Associated Press], ASSEVILLERS, FRANCE - In a move that is sure to redefine the open source community of the future, Gay Nigger Association of America (News | Websites) introduced the first open source corpse after the untimely death of Hans Bakker.
Bakker, a developer for the OpenBSD project, which preceded him in death, was travelling back to Paris after the SANE conference. Unfortunately, known hippie and NAMBLA member Richard Stallman had been dropped off at his hotel and was not in the car when a truck made the first contribution to Bakker's corpse's CVS by merging into it at high speed. Bakker's death was confirmed immediately via IRC by his virtual girlfriend.
The instant the opened skull was declared in the public domain, GNAA member Gary Niger annointed it with Holy Gay Nigger Seed to ensure a smooth passage into the afterlife and robust continued development. Thrusting rhythmically into the still-warm and pulsing brain of the dying man, Gary shouted "FUCK BSD; BSD IS DYING; BSD SUCKS; BSD IS DEAD TO ME; BSD DID WTC LOL" before exploding in orgasmic waves of pleasure as the sensitive nerves at the tip of his penis made contact with Bakker's last semi-conscious thoughts.
Associated bacteria immediately lined up to make their contributions, as did several nearby flies hoping to raise families of open source maggots. However, CmdrTaco of Slashdot, a known scene gadfly and AZT addict, flopped heavily into the area while loudly proclaiming first dibs on the rectum. In response, #GNAA attendee GasJews challenged him. "Tell that fag CmdrTaco that I've got first dibs on this dead anus," he said, "and that I'm going to beat him down, then fuck him tenderly all night long," said GasJews, liberally spraying Holy Gay Nigger Seed over the EMS personnel and local French police, who were delighted.
Since the 1990s, open source has been a popular way of developing free software for the general public, maintained by teams of pimply nerds with angst at their utter uselessness outside of the imaginary world of computers and networks. Much like a religion, it requires absolute obedience to its concept and encourages contributors to vehemently rail against any software which actually functions, including Microsoft's popular Windows operating system.
The future of Open Source Hans Baker Corpse (OSHBC) remains to be determined as the development team is still being assembled. Using the Concurrent Versions System (CVS), developers will be able to modify the corpse to refine its function as a BSD-analogue, something made easier by the fact that both are dead. All interested developers are encouraged to contact the OSHBC project at http://sourceforge.net/.
About Hans Bakker
Hans Bakker was a lowly BSD developer who like many sought to replace a real world life with online presence as a feeble justification that he was "doing something" about the world's dire situation. Most of his days were spent on IRC, flirting with fat girls who had once gone through a gothic phase before deciding on Lesbianism, at which point the resounding lack of attention nearly starved them. Read more at his unfinished closed-source site, http://www.hans.cx.
About Assevillers
Assevillers, France, is a small town of population 228 in the gorgeous pastel-colored French countryside. During WWII, it was home to several prostitutes who slept with occupying Germans, recognizing the dominant cocks of these very hetero warriors as the future of France, which has been a bottom since roughly AD 1250. The French people have fought many wars during that time and have won none of them, distingu
~~~~ "For a gay universe!"
"In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
The US reneged it's signature when dubya? was intronized by the Supreme Court.
The southeastern US saw plenty of hurricane devastation lately.
1+1=2
If people kick the shrub out, the US will stand a better chance at ratifying the Kyoto accord and remove the wasteful SUVs from the roads.
This will help reduce climate change through greenhouse gases.
And mean less damage for the US.
But that's only if the voters are able to figure out 1+1=2...Eventually, the North Atlantic currents will be affected, causing a new Ice Age. This will cause disastrous numbers of human causalities, leaving only people who are very bad actors and Al Gore. The living will envy the dead.
The US reneged it's signature when kiddy-shrub was intronized by the Supreme Court.
The southeastern US saw plenty of hurricane devastation lately.
1+1=2
If people kick the shrub out, the US will stand a better chance at ratifying the Kyoto accord and remove the wasteful SUVs from the roads.
This will help reduce climate change through greenhouse gases.
And mean less damage for the US.
But that's only if the voters are able to figure out "1+1=2"you're making the false assumption that people in America value the life of foreigners. I'd say that less than 20% of us do.
50 people killed in a car bomb in Baghdad? fuck em! all this while Lacy Peterson and "Baby Connor" warrant years of endless news coverage.
. SLASHDOT: Home of the vicious nerd.
Perhaps this is nature's way of saying "I hate you."
I think it's more like: Stop voting for Bush you arses. You deserve it.
how long until
Are you really blaming GLOBAL WARMING on George Bush? You liberals never cease to amaze.
Abortion is advocated only by persons who have themselves been born.
--Ronald Reagan
Yeah, doing what's best for the U.S. will make a lot of people angry.
No data, no cry
But it's not America, so Americans dont care.
Thank go the UN is in charge of helping out the people of Haiti...oh wait...nevermind.
People who bite the hand that feeds them usually lick the boot that kicks them
Democrats like John Kerry drive a geo metro and live in a 950 sq ft house with no air conditioning. (And his jet is towed by reindeer.)
That's assuming global warming even exists to begin with.
this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom. -- Lincoln, Gettysburg Address