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President Bush's Money For Space Cometh
citanon writes " The Washington Post reports that
House Majority Leader Tom DeLay has delivered, via the omnibus spending bill passed
Nov. 20, the President's full budgetary request of $16.2 billion dollars for NASA as a part of his
Vision for Space Exploration. Despite earlier reports that NASA's
budget will be cut, DeLay, whose congressional district now includes the Johnson Space
Center, was able to deliver the full budgetary request without any debate. NASA now has "enough money to forge ahead on a plan that would reshape U.S. space policy for decades to come."
Despite this early victory, questions regarding the full cost of the program remain unresolved. It is also unclear whether the NASA
bureaucracy will be able to rise to the challenges posed in the initiative and which current projects will suffer as a consequence."
RTFA. This $16.2 billion is for praying our way to Mars.
Bush needs somewhere to run to after he causese Armageddon... why not Mars?
"Yeah, a shrink ray! Just like that time on Muppet Babies!"
More money for NASA?!?! Wow, that's great. We've been pushing this for years. We need to look towards the future.
Oh... wait..., Bush is backing this? What a terrible idea.
The Truth.
That all the monkeys we sent up into space came back SUPER INTELLIGENT!
"Figure out a way to spin this against the Bush administration"
Easy;
There's oil in that thar Mars.....
We know Marvin has WMD's (P-38 Space Modulator)
Mars must be attacked before Mars Attacks us.
Mars is a "Red" planet....
I am the unwilling control for my Origin.
Don't panic, we've got aproximately 5 billion years to think of a way off this planet...
Nothing an e-book that says "don't panic" on the cover and a towel can't solve...
"A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of" - Ogden Nash
See Joe.
See Joe read an article on Slashdot.
See Joe get excited about NASA funding.
See Joe say bad things about Republicans.
See Joe's ambivalence -- good NASA, bad Republicans.
See Joe's head explode.
Tech, life, family, faith: Give me a visit
And it's sort of a stretch to call ant farms in space the "future of our civilization."
Is it ok if we just call it the "future of civilization" rather than the "future of OUR civilization"?
Our prospective space-ant overlords are very appreciative of the funding and support.
I think I speak for all for all physics grads when I say: "where can I sign up?".
- This and all my posts are public domain. I am a Physicist. I am not your Physicist. This is not Physically advice
tang ?
Surely, you can't be serious in suggesting we fund yet another Wonder of the World. While another Manhattan Product or an Apollo Mission would bring us valuable influence and perhaps lead Canadian and Mexican border cities to rebel and join our nation, there is little chance that we would complete either project.
Our scout units have reported that the Chinese and the Indians are both working on these Wonders, devoting the output of their largest cities. You and I both know that our industrial output, measured in shields, cannot compete with theirs.
The long-term path to victory is clear, my friends. We must build Improvements on a city-by-city basis in order to solve the energy problem. Most of our cities have a Granary and an Aqueduct now, which is a good first step. I recommend a Factory to boost production, followed by a Recycling Center and a Power Plant in each city. This will both reduce pollution and increase industrial output, allowing us to build ever more military units and product ourselves from ever-more-frequent Barbarian uprisings.
Once we have adequately defended ourselves, we can turn our industrial output toward the most important goal: building Modules for the starship that will someday take our descendants to Alpha Centauri and allow us to win The Game. Scuttlebutt has it that our scientists have almost completed the research necessary to build a Propulsion Module for our starship!
(Ignore this post if you've never played Civilization.)
Carl Rove: Where's the President now?
Aide #1: Umm, I think he just went to make a press statement about the increase in NASA's budget...?
Carl Rove spots unused, filled syringe lying on table
CR: Oh God! You forgot to give him the injection!
Scene: White House Press Conference
President GWB: Thank you Americans and members of the Press. The exploration of the Outer Spaces is an important initiative in these dangerous and uncertain times. We have enemies abroad and ih our homes. We have enemies visible and indivisible. Enemies that wish to do us harm, and enemies that don't.
Pauses, blinks.
That is why I am giving my authorization to increase funding to the Nationalized Air and Space Association, because we need to bring the fight to the enemy. Right now, we don't have a man on the Mars. This is embarrassing! We've been to Mars and by God we ought to stay there! In the days since my father ended the Cold War, we've relaxed our posture on the Space Chase, but now a new enemy is on our doorstep. He's in our backyard, too because he climbed over the fence without asking.
dramatic pause. squints at audience.
My friends, now isn't the time to fall behind and ignore these things--we must act. We must bring the fight to the enemy whenever and wherever he appears, be it in Omaha, Wisconsin or on the Mars. We cannot wait until he has the advantage and saps our precious vital fluids while we sleep.
(Carl Rove is seen edging towards the President)
Now, you may think that with our current deploymentization in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Ko-Rea we can't sustain a fight for Mars. But I'm telling you, it's not about the numbers--we have smart weapons, smart troops, and smart ideas on how to Win the Peace on Mars, by winning their hearts and minds. You see, they envy our freedom and our way of life. They envy our precious vital fluids and we...
Carl Rove moves behind the President and plunges a syringe into his buttocks.
Thank you, that's all I have to say...
[pink beam of light]
Usually the 'l' is capitalized, but I understand the gesture. Good show, submitter.
Since when has this country used intellectual elite as a pejorative term?
Didn't we outsource that already?
--
"Open source is good." - Steve Jobs
"Open source is evil." - Microsoft
You left? Really? I distinctly remember you getting kicked out. Twice.
Next thing you know, you'll be telling us that you broke up with India. "No, we totally dumped her, seriously."
Sure you did...