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Patently Silly Blog

Posted by michael on from the can't-make-it-up dept.

clonebarkins writes "The Patently Silly blog takes a humorous look at ridiculous (and, in some cases, rather uncomfortable) patents, using limericks, haikus, and Dr. Seuss-style rhymes to explain functions covered by the patent. Examples of patents parodied: Post-Mortem Reconstitution Of Circulation (6824389), Gene Related To Migraine In Man (6825332), and the anus-delving Micro Robot (6824508). Links to details about each patent are available for the genuinely curious."

11 comments

  1. Except for a few... by sconeu · · Score: 2, Interesting

    While they may be silly, they're not dumb.

    The exceptions (that I saw) were the Migraine Gene and the Transgenic Pig.

    All the others (that I saw) were actual inventions. Dumb or silly in some cases, but actual inventions.

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    General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
    1. Re:Except for a few... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Isn't the transgenic pig an actual invention (as opposed to the Migraine Gene, which clearly is a scientific discovery) as well? Why shouldn't I be able to patent the pig if I can patent the butt-bot?

  2. Shhhhhhh!!! by Stop+Error · · Score: 1

    Be careful or they will patent your comment. ;)

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  3. silly, and dumb by Changa_MC · · Score: 0
    The buttcam was the least dumb. It might be medically useful. But not particularly creative either, since a dozen actual medical dvices already perform all the jobs it might be used for.

    The rest... very dumb.

    I mean, a tail-gate cushion? There's already a cushion with a back attached for using on benches, and a tailgate is just another bench. So it's redundant and the patent should never have been accepted.

    The helicopter was invented in 2002? How is this thing different than a dozen other flying machines with propellors? The patent is again too vague to differentiate from previous art.

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    Changa hates change.
    1. Re:silly, and dumb by lothar97 · · Score: 2, Interesting
      The helicopter was invented in 2002? How is this thing different than a dozen other flying machines with properllers? The patent is again too vague to differentiate from previous art.

      No, it's actually called an orincopter. It is actually different than other helicopters, which require some sort of counterbalancing torque. Otherwise the helicopter just spins around out of control. Most helicopters have the sideways propeller in the rear (which consume 5-10% of total power per http://www.fmp.lr.tudelft.nl/showarticle.php?artic le=30), and others, like the Chinook, have two separated top blades that rotate in opposite directions.

      This guy's "orincopter" invention is not too vague- it's just in patentese. I speak patentese (IAAL), and this was a horribly drafted patent. It utilizes terms that are not defined anywhere else (such as orincopter), and do not define them in the patent itself- poor patent drafting IMHO. You want all non-common terms defined within a patent itself. The patent, although confusing, does describe the invention.

      That said, the orincopter stabilizes its flight by both spinning the propellers for lift, and also flapping the propellers for stabilization. It's kind of based upon how birds/dragonflies flap their wings. And before people start crying "you cannot patent natural things like gravity," this guy has a patent for a mechanical invention that performs this. That is something patentable.

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  4. Patent violation by SouperIan · · Score: 1

    I'm sorry, I thought SCO held the patent on worthless patents.

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    http://unelite.freelinuxhost.com - Rock/Scissors/Paper and RPGs shouldn't mix.
  5. Alright... by Changa_MC · · Score: 0

    ...I'm impressed. It said something about distorting the shape of the prop, but I didn't understand the purpose.
    That's extremely cool, although also incredibly strange.

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    Changa hates change.
  6. Something that worked for me by ShatteredDream · · Score: 3, Insightful

    My Congressman, Bob Goodlatte (R-VA, 6th), was one of the guys behind the DMCA. He got on my case for suggesting a few years ago that the DMCA might actually be harmful to individual rights and the economy. So when I contacted his office about the abuse of patent law, I sent several examples from the USPTO. I took the time to find a few stories online, pulled the patents out, looked them up on the USPTO website in a few minutes, printed them out and mailed them with a quick not on each saying what they did in plain English.

    I actually got a semi-personalized response from Goodlatte saying thanks for sending him examples of how messed up the system is. In the end that package only got his attention for a few minutes, but imagine if thousands of geeks poured through the USPTO's website and sent 10,000-20,000 patents dangerous to the U.S. economy to Congress like that. It might be enough to give whoever is in opposition enough ammo to take charge and push reform through as a way to take a jab at the majority party.

    At least do something about it, then you're basically blameless when it all goes to hell in a handbasket.

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  7. Wow by StalinJoe · · Score: 1

    I *really* enjoyed this one. Approaching this subject with humor has a kind of relief...Thank you Mr. Daniel Wright from Brooklyn.

    # whois pattentlysilly.com

    (Even the above line sounds funny when spoken aloud.)

    --
    "Those who cast the votes decide nothing; those who count the votes decide everything." - Josef Stalin
  8. Patently Grateful by damnwright · · Score: 2, Interesting

    You're most welcome.

    Thanks for the link SlashDot! I was wondering why my traffic shot up over the last few days!

    Daniel Wright
    www.patentlysilly.com