FCC to Fine Curses More Than Nuke Violations

DiZNoG writes "With Congress debating new higher fines for broadcast indecency in the wake of last year's 'wardrobe malfunction' and Howard Stern's antics, Rolling Stone has published an interesting perspective on things. Rolling Stone did a review of fines levied by other federal regulatory bodies, and has found the new indecency fines disproportionately large compared to other fines. According to the article, if the bill passes then 'for the price of Janet Jackson's 'wardrobe malfunction' during the Super Bowl, you could cause the wrongful death of an elderly patient in a nursing home and still have enough money left to create dangerous mishaps at two nuclear reactors.' The article further states the largest fine the Nuclear Regulatory Commission levied last year was $60,000, this new bill would allow broadcast indecency fines up to $500,000. Glad I keep my broadcast cursing to a minimum, now if I could only get a handle on those pesky dangerous nuclear mishaps."

Comments

Useful Terms

[DrunkenTerror]

Shit
piss
fuck
cunt
cocksucker
motherfucker

Re:Useful Terms

[Anonymous Coward]

Keep it up, I can feel the budget deficit shrinking as you speak.

Re:Useful Terms

[Tjoppen]

You left out Barbara Streisand

Re:Useful Terms

[TheRaven64]

Belgium!

Re:Useful Terms

[wfberg]

Let's work on some alternatives here..

I suggest fist to replace fuck. As in fist you, motherfister.. That immediately sounds a lot nicer.

Also, perhaps to replace piss, if it's used as a derogatory term (since there's already a perfectly good word for piss; urine), I'd suggest come, or cum as it's known online.

The phrase, this place smells like two-week old come would surely please the FCC immensly, as it contains not a single dirty word.

Now, for cunt one might describe the actual organ as vagina, or perhaps, on Oprah, as beafcurtain covered meathole, but I understand it's ofted used to refer to a person, as in "he's a cunt". Luckily, dickhead isn't on the list, otherwise what would one call Mr.Cheney's face for example?

"cocksucker" is a bit of a mystery to me. Neither word the composite is made up of is particularly naughty in its own right. While applicant of low pressure to a rooster might be an odd jobdescription, who knows if these people exist, and how much pride they might take in their work? Surely people working at the fudgepacking plant have similar feelings. Perhaps cumbucket would be an alternative with enough street-cred to supplant it some day.

As for tits, that just doesn't make sense. In particular, The Royal Tit-Watching (ornithological) Society (SFW) would take serious issue with not being able to discuss the objects of their fascination. Besides "look at the tits on her" is a term of admiration. I'd suggest we go with funbags on this one, since it would, hopefully, infuriate rabid feminists and/or puritans even more if breasts, which are actually pretty mundane things - almost all women and overweight men have them - are consistently referred to explicitely as sexual objects.

So there you have it, folks. Now leave me the fist alone, you're fudgepacking cumbuckets the lot of you!

Re:Benjamins

[Tjoppen]

Well, a wardrobe malfunction won't cause the death of a few thousand souls for starters..

"Oh no, a naked breast! Run for your lives!"

Fines....

[thewiz]

Showing a breast on national TV... $500,000
Killing an elderly person...$100,000
Screwing up at a nuclear power plant...$60,000
Running a red light...$250.00
Getting your story posted to Slashdot...Priceless

Re:Profane political speech is very potent

[colmore]

Shut up you fucking commie prick.