Slashdot Mirror
Microsoft to Offer Patches to U.S. Govt. First
Elitist_Phoenix writes "Reuters reports that 'Microsoft is to give the U.S. government priority in fixing security holes in Windows and other software, The Wall Street Journal reported on Friday. Under a plan to take effect later this year, Microsoft will give the U.S. Air Force versions of software 'patches' to fix serious security vulnerabilities up to a month before they are available to others.' Yet another attempt to fight off impending doom, by trying to keep the government away from open source?"
So they're getting the government to beta-test their patches? Sweet.
Prof. Frink: It's because the Government as the troops and the guns and the tanks and the fire falling from the sky with the burning people running amok in an orgy of blood and kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving...
That's why the Goverment is first.
"Leo Fender was in a 'state of grace' when he designed the Stratocaster." -- Paul Reed Smith
http://jayceecorder.blogspot.com
What if the patches screw up the systems
Some general 'accidentally' orders an airstrike on Redmond and blames it on buggy software.
Ok, before /. gets all in an uproar. Lets go ahead and explain this.
This is marketspeak. Marketspeak is nonsense. There is no such thing as well thought out marketspeak.
I'm sure that when the programmers heard this idea, they sat in a room and just collectively went "duh?!?" to themselves, then realized that marketting execs get paid more than they do, and laughed about it later around the water cooler.
Whoah slow down there people I think when Microsoft mean 'Patches' I think they mean their new cyber buddy aka 'Rambo-Clippy' but with new and improved PTBSD (Post Traumatic Blue Screen Disorder). Patches is gonna open up a whole lotta online whoop-ass on hackers and other terrorists.
'Patches' is a mean son'ova' gun who uses rattle snakes as condoms and pisses napalm. I for one am glad to have this online hero on our side.
I feel sorry for Uncle Sam. They get to experience the bugs of Microsoft's patches first and we'll probobly get less screwed up patches. Brilliant.
Hmm, yeah, I think that's everyone else. Except perhaps those few in Antarctica. Just leave them out in the cold yet again....
You say this.
But circa 1997, when my dad worked on Eglin Air Force Base, he threatened to call in an airstrike on a vendor. It went something like this:
Vendor: "You get to wait, sorry, screw you contractor guys."
Dad: "What does it take to get some service? Do I have to call in an airstrike on Memphis?"
Vendor: -silence- "We'll get right on that."
The phone call ends without incident.
Three hours later, the building's Security guy wanders up to my dad's cube. "...did you just threaten to call in an airstrike on in Memphis?"
Dad: "Um...possibly."
Security: "Funny. Don't do it again."
'If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.'