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Lucas To Redo Star Wars In 3-D

Posted by Zonk on from the nature-trail-to-hell dept.

Warlock7 writes "You might have thought that it was going to all be over on May 19 with the release of Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. Well, not so fast. It seems that George Lucas is planning to re-re-release the Star Wars films in a new 3-D format. There are also several other directors that are interested in this new technology and they are trying to get theaters to install new technology to allow the showing of their films in the new 3-D format [req free reg]."

14 of 593 comments (clear)

  1. Please Say It Ain't So by the_mad_poster · · Score: 5, Funny

    What does Lucas do anyway, just wake up every now and then and think "in what new ways can I rape the fond memories of a younger generation"?

    This guy's gone totally batshit insane. I think the best thing anyone could do for the franchise at this point is put the man in a damned straighjacket and throw him off the brooklyn bridge with a lead weight in a backpack on his back.

    I can respect that some people may have liked the first two pieces (even if it wasn't my cup of tea, so to speak), and this third one might be okay, but this is a little ridiculous.

    PLEASE GEORGE JUST STOP. It was a great idea the first time through with episodes 4-6, and I understand that you had to round it out with the first three parts of the series, but you're just hurting us now. Please.... please stop hurting us.

    --
    Alito: A vote for Alito is a punch in the eye to put that bitch back in her place!
    1. Re:Please Say It Ain't So by phyruxus · · Score: 5, Funny
      Every time George Lucas re-releases a Star Wars movie, god kills a domo-kun.

      PLEASE, Think Of The Domo-Kuns!

      --
      "A witty saying proves nothing." ~Voltaire
      "d'Oh!" ~Homer
    2. Re:Please Say It Ain't So by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      But George Lucas has been CONVICTED OF HAVING A MONOPOLY on Star Wars! As a convicted monopolist I'm actually forced to watch his movies. Stormtroopers with ray-guns to my head take me to the theaters, force me to pay for my tickets and watch these movies. Dear God, please make him stop!!!

    3. Re:Please Say It Ain't So by Babbster · · Score: 5, Funny
      More accurate translation: All you people who have ridiculous over-fucking-reactions to a damned movie need to find something better to care about.

      PS- Han shot first.

    4. Re:Please Say It Ain't So by StalinsNotDead · · Score: 5, Funny

      PS- Han shot first.

      There's rumors that after Episode III is released and they do a 6-DVD extra-final director's cut. Neither Greedo nor Han shoots. Instead they settle their differences peacefully and just agree to disagree.

      --
      Thanks to the internet, we can now all die alone together! -SomeWoman
  2. Maybe this time... by rekenner · · Score: 5, Funny

    Solo won't shoot at all.
    He'll have a badly redubbed over diplomatic way out of it...

    Naaah. This'll be a good thing, if Lucas doesn't mess with his own work again.

    1. Re:Maybe this time... by Winterblink · · Score: 5, Funny

      This is Lucas we're talking about here. He grasps at new ways to rape this classic film like a drowning man for a glass of water. Thus I predict the new 3D enhanced scene will play out thusly:

      GREEDO: You can tell that to Jabba. He may only take your ship.

      HAN: Over my dead body.

      GREEDO: That's the idea. I've been looking forward to killing you for a long time.

      HAN: Yes, I'll bet you have.

      Greedo fires his laser, and the scene switches to Bullet Time (tm). The camera twirls with nausia-inducing speed around the laser blast as it slowly, inexorably, approaches Solo's head. Solo bursts vertically out of his seat to execute a Trinity-style crane kick, sending Greedo sailing backwards of his chair while dodging the laser blast. In mid-air, Solo draws his blaster, drains its power cell into Greedo's twirling body before he hits the ground. Return to Real Time (tm).

      HAN: Sorry about the mess.

      --
      "I'm a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar."
      -Hoban Washburn
  3. Penny Arcade by Anonymous+Crowhead · · Score: 5, Funny

    This DVD set will be called "Star Wars: The Expensive Edition".

  4. Why Stop? by ackthpt · · Score: 5, Funny
    PLEASE GEORGE JUST STOP

    Four words: Jar-Jar in 3D

    "Oh the humanity!"

    --

    A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
    1. Re:Why Stop? by ReverendLoki · · Score: 5, Funny

      Four more: Slave Leia in 3D.

      --
      09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
    2. Re:Why Stop? by MutantHamster · · Score: 5, Funny
      now, if only they'd also show outtakes in #d as well (rumour has it, that thing had a hard time staying on) *grin*

      Yes! You may finally find out what a breast looks like!

      --
      My Greatest Heist - Muisc partly inspired by the unbeatable Qwantz
  5. Awesome! by geeveees · · Score: 5, Funny

    In this version, Alderaan shoots first!

    --
    I am a viral sig. Please help me spread.
  6. That'll show you youngsters! by Thud457 · · Score: 5, Funny
    mmmmmm.... Behold the glory of the gold bikini in stupendous Lucasvision!!!!

    It's like they're following me...

    --

    the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

  7. Re:9 Episodes... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    "The only thing that DOESN'T happen is that Leia isn't tied up and placed on a set of train tracks by a moustached villain."

    Thanks for the idea, I'll go put this into Revenge of the Sith right now!

    -George