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Permormance-Enhancing Contact Lenses

Posted by timothy on from the hola-gargoyle dept.

coastal984 writes "With all the allegations, criticisms, congressional hearings, and suspensions concerning performance-enchancing steroids and supplements in sports, namely Major League Baseball, Nike has now introduced performance-enhancing contact lenses. These new lenses, which give players wearing them a scary orange/amber tint to their eyes, block out useless blue tones and make colors such as red (i.e. the seams on a baseball, vital to batters) easier to see. They also block out sun rays and help ease shadows, as well as improve overall vision. There are also versions for golfers and other sports, and soon to be versions for night contests as well."

2 of 102 comments (clear)

  1. useless blue tones by ZSpade · · Score: 5, Funny

    block out useless blue tones

    And at once a thousand tiny hi-piched screams sounded through the night, and no one ever saw a smurf, ever again.

    --
    Go ahead and call me unreliable; reliable is just a synonym for predictable.
  2. slashdot... news for... by killa62 · · Score: 5, Funny

    NERDS. stuff that MATTERS!
    Sports? bah...