Slashdot Mirror
Canada Loses North Pole
An anonymous reader submits "The Earth's roaming magnetic pole has moved out of Canada and into international waters as it heads towards Siberia. The magnetic pole has been within Canada's current boundaries for at least the past 400 years and left sometime in the past year after rapidly picking up speed in 2001. If it keeps to its current course and expected speed, it should reach Siberia by the middle of the century. There's speculation that December's tsunami causing earthquake may have been one of the factors causing the pole to move more quickly than predicted."
Good day, gentlemen. As you are no doubt aware, I have perfected a device capable of manipulating the earth's magnetic field. This device has already shifted the position of the earth's poles by a significant margin, and will continue to do so, eventually forcing the poles to swap positions entirely. For this reason, I've christened this latest caper 'Operation Roly-Poley'...
You see, gentlemen, Operation Roly-Poley will continue to destabilize the magnetic field of our fragile world, causing geological and meteorological disturbances on a global scale...that is, of course...unless you pay me...
One hundred billion kajillion fafillion dollaaaars!
(cue dramatic music)
Gentlemen, you have my demands...peace out.
____
~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey
in a shocking turn of events, Santa Claus takes advantage of his new out-of-borders workshop and cuts elf wages by 50%
Why does everyone always blame Canada?
Maybe they didn't lose it, maybe it was stolen, maybe it snuck off on it's own, maybe it's just on summer vacation.
I see even classic Slashdot is now pretty much unusable on dial up anymore.
Le monde finit. Les Canadiens disent ce qui continue, eh?
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