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Solar Sail Launch Failure Confirmed

Creedo writes "Russian space officials announced today that the yesterday's solar sail vehicle launch has indeed failed."

10 of 431 comments (clear)

  1. i'm sorry by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    in soviet russia, solar sails fail you.

    i didnt want to do this, but i had to. i dont know why.

    i'm so sorry. all i've ever wanted was to be loved

  2. In other news... by It+doesn't+come+easy · · Score: 5, Funny

    Chief Spokesperson for the North American Aerospace Defense Command (NORAD) today confirmed that the new and improved Cheyenne Mountain Operations Center (CMOC), first announced last January, is fully functional. "We had our first real world test yesterday when an ICBM launch was detected from an as yet unidentified submarine in the Barents Sea. I am happy to report that the threat was eliminated without incident."

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    The NSA: The only part of the US government that actually listens.
  3. misappropreations by TrippTDF · · Score: 5, Funny

    they could have spent the same 4 million to become Batman, and still have money to spare.

  4. Laughing by Cthefuture · · Score: 3, Funny

    You just know that right now there are some aliens up there watching and laughing their asses off. They probably record everything we do and broadcast their own reality series back to their planet(s). "Tonight on funniest earth out-takes..."

    Come on you Vulcan bastards, come down here and help us pathic morons!

    Seriously though, I think current world events (including the decline of Russia's military and America's focus on homeland dipshiatery) has lead to lack of interest/funding/training in space-related activies. The result is inevitable.

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    The ratio of people to cake is too big
  5. Re:Contradiction? by glsunder · · Score: 5, Funny

    Is it me, or does the Fox article contradict itself?

    Nah, they're just being Fair and Balanced.

  6. Re:Three strikes and you're *out*... by saider · · Score: 5, Funny

    Cosmos 1 was funded by the insurance money from the previous failure...

    Explorer : I want to buy some insurance for a satellite that I plan on launching on a Soviet...er....Russian ICBM.

    Insurance Agent : What dollar value is your craft valued at?

    Explorer : The launch vehicle and orbiter total to about 4 million dollars. So what's the premium going to look like?

    Insurance Agent : 4 million dollars.

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    Remember, You are unique...just like everyone else.
  7. Re:So much for cold war escalation. by saider · · Score: 3, Funny

    I mean, if they can't even make a simple booster rocket on a modified SLBM fire correctly, how are they supposed to get MIRVs up to a height to fall (albeit haphazardly) on US soil?

    That's what Canada was for.

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    Remember, You are unique...just like everyone else.
  8. Monty Python by kaellinn18 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Reminds me of the scene from the Holy Grail. Edited to make it relevant to the situation.

    Other countries said we were daft to build a solar sail and launch it into the atmosphere, but we built it all the same, just to show 'em. It burned up in the atmosphere. So, we built a second one. That burned up in the atmosphere. So, we built a third one. That launched, failed to boost, then burned up in the atmosphere, but the fourth one... stayed up! And that's what you're gonna get, lad: the strongest solar sail in this system.

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  9. Re:Contradiction? by Rei · · Score: 5, Funny

    I thought their slogan was "Fox News: We Decide, You Nod Your Head In Agreement Or Yell At The Screen, But Either Way Our Ratings Climb"

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    The War of 1812... the good 'ol days when the federal government actually tried to save New Orleans.
  10. Only on Slashdot by Detritus · · Score: 3, Funny

    Only on Slashdot can the Russians fuck up a launch, and then some idiot uses it as "evidence" of NASA's incompetence, and gets modded up for it.

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    Mea navis aericumbens anguillis abundat