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Wild Gorillas Impress With Their Tools
fatgav writes "The BBC is running an article about wild gorillas being seen to use tools in the wild. It is especially significant as not only have Gorillas never been seen to use tools, but they have been using them in a way unlike other great apes. From the article: 'The most astonishing thing is that we have observed them using tools not for obtaining food, but for postural support.' The scientists are getting excited as it can help to explain questions as to how the most advanced great ape (us) came to evolve."
Are we any closer to explaining this:
http://www.ntk.net/media/dancemonkeyboy.mpg.
And yet they say "Intelligent Design" isn't a falsifiable theory...
Let's just hope they never evolve to the level where they take up arms and declare war against us. Our record in Gorilla warfare hasn't been so stellar.
I thought Gorillas had relatively small "tools" compared to their human counterparts. Certainly nothing much to impress with.
Human tools are bigger than gorilla tools... I mean, that's what makes us "great" apes right? (That and out ability to make puns at the drop of a hat!)
Hahaha, hey, 769 BC called, they want their myths and lengends they pulled out of their ass back!!!
Such the wrong impression from that title. My mind is way too low right now.
My teacher says it proves all answers are in the Bible and that science nowdays is work of the devil. If you believe in science you're a fool. I pray for your souls.
Not a big deal, we already control the gorillas' habitats.
Now when the dolphins grow opposable thumbs, then we're screwed.
See these WILD gorillas use their tools in ways never seen before! Order now and get "Gorillas Gone Wild: Spring Break Edition." A new tape sent every month, cancel any time!
Wild Gorillas Impress With Their Tools... oh my, they do.
(Seriously, this is from a real book)
Excerpt From "Gorillas among Us: A Primate Ethnographer's Book of Days"
"Whoever would overthrow the liberty of a nation must begin by subduing the freeness of speech."--Benjamin Franklin
And they are such showoffs about it. I was invited over to the zoo last weekend by a gorilla. He was chugging the beers when he suddenly decided to take me to the tool shed to show me the new bandsaw he bought the day before.
:(
From t-squares to circular saws, that ape had it all. I'm envious
Advice for my fellow geeks: before seeking out that threesome you dream of, you might see what a TWOsome is like first.
k.
"In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart." - Anne Frank
Really now, slashdot. I'm ashamed. You call yourselves technophiles? My buddies and I were on 'the scene' of these new technologies 6,000 years ago! Honestly!
Next comes Planet of the Apes
Where do I sign up for these jobs?
From the article: 'The most astonishing thing is that we have observed them using tools not for obtaining food, but for postural support.'
Sure, because being simple souls, they get all of the flown-in pasta they can pray for. And of course, Postural Support is exactly the sort of thing that you'd expect from a Creator that really understands what it's like to have only Noodly Appendages.
Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
"Actually, some folks think baboons are more intelligent than gorillas... Steve Van Nattan is one. Here's a really odd..." Uhh, are you saying that Steve van Nattan is a baboon or a gorilla?
Oh well, what the hell...
Murdoc & Noodle do OK with their axes - dunno if you give Russel credit (are drumsticks tools?) but 2D's certainly learned to make the best with what he's lost...
"Win treats sysadmins better than users. Mac treats users better than sysadmins. Linux treats everyone like sysadmins."
Now they're seen using walking sticks. Perhaps we'll find that apes use the sticks in different styles, and that some styles are learned by watching other apes. What would we look for to discover that some of that learning is derived from the marks made by the sticks, rather than watching a stick-using ape "in person"? If we found those records, would we have discovered "ape fashion magazines"?
"Oh... My... God. Did you even SEE that gnarly branch that Og was carrying around yesterday? And he calls that a walking stick? What-EVER. I so can't believe that I almost copulated with him last mating season. I only hope the primatologists weren't watching. I would NEVER be able to live with myself..."
"That must have been some come-hither look she was giving him!"
That wasn't a "come hither" look. That was a "Are you done already? Don't you dare roll over and fall asleep until I've had an orgasm".
You forgot the 1 comment wishing for a beowulf cluster of tool-using gorillas.
"All great wisdom is contained in .signature files"
Evolution? Pssssh. Everyone knows we were created by the flying spaghetti monster.
Wild Gorillas Impress With Their Tools
The Internet is just full of sickos, isn't it.
Thirty three times and he still wouldn't give her a bite of his celery... Meanwhile, somewhere among the hairless apes, there is a male who has taken a female to dinner thirty three times and never even gotten to second base. Proof that the universe is in perfect balance.
Liberals call everyone Nazis yet they are the closest thing to it.
The three most important words in a relationship are "I love you." The two most important are "Humor me."
They use chairs as a tool. An alpha male will throw a chair at a beta male leaving for another tribe.
That last sentence... is he talking about the celery?
Lost: Sig, white with black letters. No collar. Reward if found!
sorry wilted stalk still clenched in his fist
I bet he did!!
"There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter," Jeeves, (Jeeves and the Impending Doom)
This is just another example of the extreme activist scientists pushing their satanic lies of "evolution" down our throats. You see an ape with a stick and you think evolution? HELLO PEOPLE! God made the world in 7 DAYS! God made MAN. God made APES. APES did NOT make MAN!!!
You need to crack open your Holy Bible and repent for this transgression against God almighty! It is through HIS Intelligent Design of the world that you exist!!!
I shall go and tell the indestructible man that someone plans to murder him.