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Superman 'Too Big' for the Big Screen

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the i-always-thought-hal-would-be-the-hung-one dept.

Evilelf writes "The new Superman is giving movie bosses a headache - because of the size of his bulge. They fear Brandon Routh's profile in the superhero's skintight costume could be distracting, reports the Sun. Hollywood executives have ordered the makers of Superman Returns to cover it up with digital effects."

7 of 427 comments (clear)

  1. Lies! by xmuskrat · · Score: 5, Informative

    This is totally untrue. The actually designed the suit with that in mind, and added padding to deal with it.

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    activestudios web design
    1. Re:Lies! by Agent00Wang · · Score: 5, Informative

      Apparently just an rumor.

      http://www.darkhorizons.com/news05/051213f.php

      --
      NINJA SPIRIT - The Ancient Art of Insanity
    2. Re:Lies! by sgant · · Score: 5, Informative

      Yes, this is totally untrue and no they didn't spend a bunch of money to digitally take it out.

      Sheesh EvilElf....nice how you actually go about researching a story. Heck, one google search on this would show you that this is totally made up.

      And also kudos to CmdrTaco for posting this....you submit anything now?

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      "Leo Fender was in a 'state of grace' when he designed the Stratocaster." -- Paul Reed Smith
  2. False. Debunked. On Tuesday. by loggia · · Score: 5, Informative

    link

    1. Re:False. Debunked. On Tuesday. by Fnkmaster · · Score: 5, Informative

      Just look for yourself. I'm sure he's well endowed, but there's nothing distractingly large about that bulge - you know, nothing John Holmes-style. Superman is still supposed to have the normal masculine anatomy, as far as I know, so having no bulge would be much weirder.

  3. Obligatory Niven Link by __aagctu1952 · · Score: 5, Informative

    Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex

  4. Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex by Savantissimo · · Score: 5, Informative
    That could cause some problems.

    From: "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex", by Larry Niven:

    Consider the driving urge between a man and a woman, the monomaniacal urge to achieve greater and greater penetration. Remember also that we are dealing with kryptonian muscles.

    Superman would literally crush LL's body in his arms, while simultaneously ripping her open from crotch to sternum, gutting her like a trout.

    *

    Lastly, he'd blow off the top of her head.

    Ejaculation of semen is entirely involuntary in the human male, and in all other forms of terrestrial life. It would be unreasonable to assume otherwise for a kryptonian. But with kryptonian muscles behind it, Kal-El's semen would emerge with the muzzle velocity of a machine gun bullet. (*One can imagine that the Kent home in Smallville was riddled with holes during Superboy's puberty. And why did Lana Lang never notice that?*) ...
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